Funny story: LOST - Sense of Humour - search is underway

LOST - Sense of Humour - search is underway

It would seem that many people in this world have, indeed, lost their 'sense of humour'. A search is being launched to address this sad situation. An 'Anger Alert' has been issued worldwide in an effort to track down where some people's 'sense of humour' is hiding. Special SWAT teams (Searching Whilst Amusing Themselves)are being put together in an effort to end the misery of these saddos...
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Funny story: BA Goofs by including Osama in Collector Boarding Passes

BA Goofs by including Osama in Collector Boarding Passes

Just like baseball cards, BA is issuing boarding passes of famous passengers. One of the first in the series is Osama Bin Laden, which has received a great deal of criticism. Embarrassed by the choice, an official apology was issued today and down...
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Funny story: BP Ship Icelandic Lava to Plug Oil Leak

BP Ship Icelandic Lava to Plug Oil Leak

British Petroleum have loaded a flotilla of ships with lava from the Icelandic volcano in the latest attempt to plug the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico; an operation that BP are calling Cup Pompeii. The ships now face a four thousand mile journey...
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Funny story: Gary Coleman Police Report -- 'Little to be Suspicious About'

Gary Coleman Police Report -- 'Little to be Suspicious About'

The police officer who responded to Gary Coleman's home on the day he was hospitalized claims he observed "little to be suspicious about" about the scene at the actor's diminutive home, according to the police report. In the report, Officer Mike...
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Funny story: Irrelevant Billionaire to Direct That Guy From Remote Control. Not Kari Wuhrer, The Other Guy. No, Not The Dead Guy, The Other Guy.

Irrelevant Billionaire to Direct That Guy From Remote Control. Not Kari Wuhrer, The Other Guy. No, Not The Dead Guy, The Other Guy.

Jerry Seinfeld will descend from the Heavens to make his stage-directing Off-Broadway debut, with hugely underrated comedian Colin Quinn's upcoming show Long Story Short. The one man show will be focusing on "2,000 years of human civilization and...
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Funny story: Cantankerous Contractions Prevent Loss of Prom Night Virginity

Cantankerous Contractions Prevent Loss of Prom Night Virginity

While teenagers around the U.S. prepare for the end of the regular school year, the onset of an annual Prom night event promises to yield a new set of challenges to those young lovers anxious to get their first 15 second sexual experience out of the...
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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan Had To be Anesthetized For Surgery; No Drug Strong Enough Exists.

Lindsay Lohan Had To be Anesthetized For Surgery; No Drug Strong Enough Exists.

A Beverly Hills dentist had to anesthetize alleged celebrity cocaine tester Lindsay Lohan so that her wisdom teeth could be removed. Lohan's dentist, Dr. Frank Sangster, tried normal methods of treating Lohan, but nothing he tried worked. "I tr...
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Funny story: Royal Freak Hospital boffin heads Bloodbath in Cumbria Inquiry

Royal Freak Hospital boffin heads Bloodbath in Cumbria Inquiry

Whitehaven, Cumbria - (Rioters): "Fare dodgers and stingy tippers, ya?" Prof Einstein Flinstone commented today as news of the Cumbrian cabbie's bloodbath rampage spread across the world. The eminent psychiatrist was airlifted from Yorkshire to le...
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Funny story: Shades Of 2000! Al Gore Comes In Second Again As Heidi Montag Divorces Spencer Pratt

Shades Of 2000! Al Gore Comes In Second Again As Heidi Montag Divorces Spencer Pratt

As Yogi Berra would say, "It's deja vue all over again" as Dumb & Dumber knock Al Gore from the front page! "I bet that if I killed myself, Obama's Mama-In-Law would pick that day to run naked through the Rose Garden", stated Al Gore after som...
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Funny story: Lee Nelson's well bad broken nose

Lee Nelson's well bad broken nose

The BBC's tepid foray into underclass humour has suffered a set back even before the first show is due to be aired. The so called 'likeable' chav Lee Nelson (aka Simon Brodkin) was involved in a fracas with a californian singer that nearly cost hi...
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Funny story: Medium Acorah in TV First

Medium Acorah in TV First

Spiritualist Derek Acorah is set to attempt a TV first by contacting the spirit of Phil Collins' pet dog. 'Buster', a 10-year-old German Shepherd, died in 2005 after mistaking a small land-mine for a Frisbee, and pop-star Collins is eager to hear...
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Funny story: John Mayer Cancels Tour Due to Terrible Case of Suck

John Mayer Cancels Tour Due to Terrible Case of Suck

Immature Kiss and Tell narcissist and perpetual douchebag John Mayer has canceled several shows in Europe due to illness, according to a posting on his Web site, Guess-who-Im-nailing-now.org Mayer is returning home to the United States, where he w...
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Funny story: God to Smite TT&A For Screwing Over iPad Owners. Again.

God to Smite TT&A For Screwing Over iPad Owners. Again.

God announced today that He will smite the evil overlords at TT&A, who said Wednesday that it is moving to a metered pricing plan for its smartphones, phasing out unlimited data usage for new customers. TT&A also states that new iPad cust...
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Funny story: Drunken Parrots Rob Convenience Store

Drunken Parrots Rob Convenience Store

Palmerston, Australia. Thousands of parrots live in and around this northern Australian town with a tropical climate. Occasionally a parrot will drop from a tree, after eating fruit that has fermented, and spout whatever they have heard humans sa...
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Funny story: BP's latest attempt to stop oil flow fails

BP's latest attempt to stop oil flow fails

BP's latest attempt to stop the oil flow from the ruptured pipe has failed. The company is attempting to contain the spill from the well by cutting off the fractured pipe and sealing it with a cap. During the cutting process the saw has got stuck...
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Funny story: America's Got Talent: Maricar The Sexy Whip-Cracking Dominatrix Is A Big Hit

America's Got Talent: Maricar The Sexy Whip-Cracking Dominatrix Is A Big Hit

LOS ANGELES - Every year on America's Got Talent there is a certain act that really makes the judges sit up and take notice. This year is no exception and the act is Maricar the sexy, whip-cracking dominatrix. The 38-year-old masked beauty certain...
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Funny story: Islamic 'Nutty" professor say's breastfeeding women dressed in burkas can also feed adult males?!

Islamic 'Nutty" professor say's breastfeeding women dressed in burkas can also feed adult males?!

An amazing fatwa has been issued by an Egyptian Islamic professor claiming he spoke to the prophet Mohammed and he told him: "burka clad women breastfeeding their babies can also breastfeed adult men?" Now, most normal, modern people would suggest...
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Funny story: "Lost" Star Jorge Garcia Deals With Personal Tragedy

"Lost" Star Jorge Garcia Deals With Personal Tragedy

"I don't care what anyone thinks, she and I were very close and I'll let the tears go if I like." That was 'Lost' star Jorge Garcia's message to the press yesterday after he told them he had lost his beloved dog, Nunu. The Chihuahua had ran out...
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Funny story: Latest Internet Scam turns out to be a Hoax

Latest Internet Scam turns out to be a Hoax

The latest scam put out by unscrupulous spammers turns out to be just a simple hoax. The scam mail was sent to the inbox of anyone with a government email address in the UK, but is also thought to have been circulated using other mailing lists.
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Funny story: BP: "Cut & Cap" Not Working! Obama: I'm Cutting A Fart & Gonna Cap It Over CEO's Mouth!

BP: "Cut & Cap" Not Working! Obama: I'm Cutting A Fart & Gonna Cap It Over CEO's Mouth!

Now the saw that was cutting through the leaking oil well in the Gulf of Mexico has gotten stuck. "I knew we shouldn't have pulled that slick deal in Haiti", mumbled BP Oil's third spokesman in as many weeks. "Sure as the world we're under a curs...
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Funny story: Brazilian footy team give Zimbabweans something to laugh about, or?

Brazilian footy team give Zimbabweans something to laugh about, or?

The Brazilian Footy team entered Zimbabwe at their peril today and offered 50.000 Zimbabweans something to laugh at, or not? Zimbabwe these days is no laughing matter with multi-millionaire scoundrel, dictator and general arse-hole, Robert Mugabe,...
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Funny story: Sky News Reporter Anna Botting Slammed Over Ghoulish Coverage Of Cumbria Gun Rampage

Sky News Reporter Anna Botting Slammed Over Ghoulish Coverage Of Cumbria Gun Rampage

Sky News reporter Anna Botting was slammed today by media watchers for what has been described as "insensitive" reporting over the Derrick Bird Cumbrian gun rampage. Complaints were received about Botting's reporting, as she seemed almost in a sta...
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Funny story: BP Worker's Oversized Bowel Movement Blamed for Disaster

BP Worker's Oversized Bowel Movement Blamed for Disaster

After starting their criminal investigation into the BP Oil Spill only very recently, Attorney General Eric Holder, and his team of Federal experts believe that they have finally gotten to the bottom of the matter. Investigators now seem to b...
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Funny story: Kim Jong Il Hires Fashion Consultant to Spruce Up Image

Kim Jong Il Hires Fashion Consultant to Spruce Up Image

Known for a forehead seventeen times the width of his mouth and oversized glasses that went out of style in the 70's, Kim Jong Il has hired a famed Hollywood fashion consultant to help refresh the leader's public image. German born wunderkind of t...
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Funny story: SEC Chairman Denies Porn Problem: "Employees Capable of Chewing Gum And Masturbating At Same Time"

SEC Chairman Denies Porn Problem: "Employees Capable of Chewing Gum And Masturbating At Same Time"

SEC Chairman Mary Schapiro, stunned by accusations that dozens of her employees, some making more than $200,000 a year, were not sleeping at the job during the financial crisis after all. According to reports, they were wide awake and fully aroused...
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Funny story: Top 2010 Investment Tips

Top 2010 Investment Tips

New York, NY: Expectations for significant economic growth are foreseen in the second half of 2010, according to a blue ribbon panel of financial, economic, and business leaders. Despite uncertain global economic conditions plagued by mounting i...
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Funny story: Derrick Bird - Cumbrian Gun Rampage Sparks Media Mess

Derrick Bird - Cumbrian Gun Rampage Sparks Media Mess

Live report - Following another murderous gun rampage conducted by a gunman in Cumbria this lunchtime, which left so far 12 confirmed dead and 25 wounded, media coverage of the event is bound to prompt some hard questions. Our sources say that Der...
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Funny story: Al Gore Caught In Sex Toy Shop!

Al Gore Caught In Sex Toy Shop!

Obviously wearing a red wig and big handlebar mustache, Al Gore was spotted this morning in a Sex Toy store in Knoxville, "The Big Boy Toys"! "Let's see", I've got the Wonderful Wanda and the Fireman's red pump...I wonder what else I need", stated...
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Funny story: America's Got Talent Season Premier: David Hasselhoff Out - Howie Mandel In

America's Got Talent Season Premier: David Hasselhoff Out - Howie Mandel In

LOS ANGELES - America's Got Talent kicked off its fifth season and judge David "The Brewmaster" Hasselhoff was nowhere to be seen. And sitting in the Hoff's chair was Howie "Don't Touch Me Bro" Mandel. Howie apparently made a pretty good deal for...
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Funny story: 4.5-billion-year-old "fossil brain" located inside Sen. Robert Byrd's head!

4.5-billion-year-old "fossil brain" located inside Sen. Robert Byrd's head!

WALTER REED HOSPITAL (ABSNN) -- Army physicians conducting a MRI of Senator Robert Byrd Democrat from West Virgina, were stunned to discover that where his brain should be was, instead, a 4.5-billion-year-old fossil corporolite (dung) which proved, a...
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Funny story: More Letters To The Editor

More Letters To The Editor

Sir I see on the news again that we've got another nutter running amok shooting people. This time in Cumbria. What really gets my goat about this kind of thing is that the killer eventually turns the gun on himself. If he would only start at the end and work his way backwards then the first victim of his killing spree would be himself. It would save an awful lot of time and trouble for all conc...
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Funny story: Church doesn't get the odds

Church doesn't get the odds

So me and Dino go to church last Sunday 'cause we're been doing all kinds of shit that God can't stand, like banging chicks out of matrimony on the kitchen tables. Anyway, out front of the church on the God board it says Philippians 1:3-6. I can't believe what I'm fuckin' reading. If this church is giving the Flyers 1:3 odds against Chicago and having them win in 6, I'm becoming a Protestant.
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Funny story: Confusion reigns as Fabio picks wrong squad

Confusion reigns as Fabio picks wrong squad

Fooball bosses admitted today that "terrible mistakes" had been made when announcing England's final 23 players for the World Cup Finals. Bosses blamed Fabio Capello's inability to communicate effectively in English for the fact that Boris Johnson...
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Funny story: Robert Pattinson Gets The Crap Beat Out Of Him!

Robert Pattinson Gets The Crap Beat Out Of Him!

A group of young men spotted the heartbreak of many of their girlfriends on a street in New York City yesterday, made some quick calls and waylaid actor Robert Pattinson after he was pulled into an alley. "I guess his hair looks a bit messed up at...
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Funny story: Crossbow Cannibal 'boasted of dumping ex-girlfriend on Faecesbook'

Crossbow Cannibal 'boasted of dumping ex-girlfriend on Faecesbook'

Bradford, Yorks - (Slashers): Debriefing sources said today the self-confessed Crossbow Cannibal 'had invited an ex-girlfriend for dinner' before dumping her on the iconic social networking site. Stephen Griffiths, a postgraduate doctoral faeces (...
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Funny story: EU Council of Rodents Declares Amnesty On Rats to Encourage Understanding and Enforce Health & Safety!

EU Council of Rodents Declares Amnesty On Rats to Encourage Understanding and Enforce Health & Safety!

In yet another show of humanity, the EU Council of Rodents declared a life time amnesty on previous efforts to eradicate the rodents by banning any type of anticoagulants in trying to control the disease carrying pests! Saying that some ingredient...
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Funny story: Cumbria drive-by shooter Derrick Bird causes 'Hungerford-style' carnage

Cumbria drive-by shooter Derrick Bird causes 'Hungerford-style' carnage

Cumbria - (Big Bang Theories): A massive manhunt is under way after 52 year-old Rowrah cabbie Derrick Bird went on a Hungerford-style shooting rampage. The incident has temporarily knocked Bradford Ripper and self-declared 'Crossbow Cannibal' off...
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Funny story: Derek Acorah goes on strike - the dead rebel!

Derek Acorah goes on strike - the dead rebel!

Derek Acorah, the world's most good looking psychic medium, has announced that he is to go on strike, starting last week. His week-old self will psychically know that he has decided in the future to go on strike, and down tools. Already, the dead...
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Funny story: New Derek Acorah Applelet causes a sensation

New Derek Acorah Applelet causes a sensation

Derek Acorah, world famous psychic medium and carpet whisperer has teamed up with Apple to create the Derek Acorah iPhone Applelet. This applet has three functions. Firstly, it does away with the need to store telephone numbers of your contacts. U...
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Funny story: Princess Fergie to appear in Star Wars VII

Princess Fergie to appear in Star Wars VII

The financial woes of Sarah Ferguson may be over after she signed up yesterday to appear in a new science-fiction blockbuster. Fergie will take a leading role in Star Wars VII - the Return of the Syphillis. She has been offered £500,000 to pla...
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Funny story: "Please stand clear of the doors or everyone will drown."

"Please stand clear of the doors or everyone will drown."

Boris Johnson has promised to cheer up commuters with a Victoria Line extension that will rival Thorpe Park for thrills and spills. Brixton to Loughborough Junction will be like any other tube journey, however between Loughbrough Juction and Cambe...
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Funny story: Every British taxpayer is involved with illegal drugs

Every British taxpayer is involved with illegal drugs

If you are a taxpayer in England and you think you are squeaky clean when it comes to illegal drugs etc., think again! Apparently, some of your tax monies are helping pay for methadone or other heroine substitutes for inmates in the prison system. Hey! They have 'rights' too you know! Poor babies! "The report by independent think-tank Policy Exchange warned that by next year 73,000 priso...
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Funny story: Leona Lewis tour is cursed

Leona Lewis tour is cursed

Willowy pop princess Leona Lewis is bringing in an exorcist for her current Labyrinth tour after an old gypsy woman cursed the show. The old gypsy woman was waiting outside the stage door of the first show in Sheffield, begging for change. When th...
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Funny story: Simon Cowell Blasts X-Factor Judge Louis Walsh and Britain's Got Talent Judge Piers Morgan

Simon Cowell Blasts X-Factor Judge Louis Walsh and Britain's Got Talent Judge Piers Morgan

LONDON - In a somewhat surprising move Simon Cowell has lashed out at two of his employees. Cowell first jumped all over X-Factor judge Louis Walsh. Cowell, who is known by many nicknames including "The Viceroy of Venom" remarked that Walsh has go...
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Funny story: Hopper Chopper up for Auction

Hopper Chopper up for Auction

Dennis Hopper Paraphernalia Auction, Hollywood. Brad Simpson, no relation to Bart, is a rich but not famous collector of Hollywood related regalia. With the sad passing of actor Dennis Hopper, Simpson is ready to part with everything that remind...
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Funny story: Israel Wins Paintball Match Off Gaza

Israel Wins Paintball Match Off Gaza

Israel seals another win to further strengthen it's bit to uproot record for Most Kills, held, ironically, by the Nazi Germans of '43. The Freedom Flotilla played a different game compared to Israel: mostly defensive, and on their knees. But Israe...
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Funny story: Sarah Palin Criticizes NBC, Uses Big Words.

Sarah Palin Criticizes NBC, Uses Big Words.

Psycho nitwit Sarah Palin is moose-shootin' mad at NBC over their interview Tuesday with Joe McGinniss, the journalist who is writing a book about the 8-time college dropout and currently renting the home next door to her. Ignoring her thesaurus,...
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Funny story: Homer Simpson named Greatest TV Character!

Homer Simpson named Greatest TV Character!

According to an Entertainment Weekly survey Homer Simpson has been voted the greatest TV and Film character of the last 20 years. This is particularly poignant for England as it has long been known in celebrity circles that despite Homer being a U...
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Funny story: Letters To The Editor: Dogs, Robin Hood, and The Blarney Stone

Letters To The Editor: Dogs, Robin Hood, and The Blarney Stone

Dear Editor: My unmarried auntie Ida Ravenscroft, 67, and I were wondering if they ever found out "Who Let The Dogs Out?" Byron Basil Ravenscroft Tooting, England Dear Byron: Yes they did. It was a 33-year-old unemployed crumpet maker from Coventry by the name of Lysander Walpole. He was arrested and is currently serving 2 years (that's 14 in dog years) in London's Petula Clark Prison For B...
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Funny story: Catholic Priest Found To Be "Completely Normal"

Catholic Priest Found To Be "Completely Normal"

After the many recent scandals involving the Roman Catholic church and sex, there was only a muffled silence this morning when it was announced that a Catholic priest had been found who was 'completely normal' . The priest, identified from thousan...
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Funny story: Feds to James Cameron: Can You CGI This Oil Spill For Us?

Feds to James Cameron: Can You CGI This Oil Spill For Us?

Federal officials hope King of the World film director James Cameron can help them come up with ideas on how to stop the disastrous oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. The writer and director of the 1981 fecesburger "Piranha II: The Spawning", who, b...
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Funny story: Racist Arizona Governor Defends "Git The F--k Out Beaners Act of 2010" to Obama; Obama warned to bring passport with him.

Racist Arizona Governor Defends "Git The F--k Out Beaners Act of 2010" to Obama; Obama warned to bring passport with him.

Arizona Grand Wizard Jan Brewer said on Tuesday that she intends to press the issue of "gettin' rid of the Beaners" in a meeting this week with President Barack Obama at the White House. Arizona recently enacted a bill cracking down on undocumente...
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Funny story: Charlie Sheen To Beat Himself With Hundred Dollar Bills

Charlie Sheen To Beat Himself With Hundred Dollar Bills

It seems Charlie Sheen has reached an agreement with authorities in Colorado over domestic violence allegations involving his wife, though either party would disclose details. Sheen has reportedly thrown himself at the mercy of the court over assa...
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Funny story: Gelatinous, Useless Big Boobed Orange Midget Spotted Dancing With Mother in Deptford, NJ Club.

Gelatinous, Useless Big Boobed Orange Midget Spotted Dancing With Mother in Deptford, NJ Club.

By the way, everyone knows that she is 100% Chilean, right? I mean, she was adopted by an Italian family. That doesn't make her Italian. Hated Italian stereotype Nicole "Snooki" "Fat F-ck" Polizzi, the self proclaimed "Guidette" from Marlboro, New...
View 'Gelatinous, Useless Big Boobed Orange Midget Spotted Dancing With Mother in Deptford, NJ Club.'
Funny story: J.J. Abrams Crappy Lost Finale Kills Hurley's Dog! "The ending of Nunu's life was as terrible and senseless as the ending of 'Lost'."

J.J. Abrams Crappy Lost Finale Kills Hurley's Dog! "The ending of Nunu's life was as terrible and senseless as the ending of 'Lost'."

Jorge Garcia, the gelatinous actor who spent 14 of his 15 minutes of fame playing Hurley on "Lost," claims that Oceanic 815 has taken another life: This time it's his chihuahua. On his blog, Garcia, 37, states that his dog Nunu, 49 in dog years,...
View 'J.J. Abrams Crappy Lost Finale Kills Hurley's Dog! "The ending of Nunu's life was as terrible and senseless as the ending of 'Lost'."'
Funny story: Letters to the Editor -Part II from the Colonies!

Letters to the Editor -Part II from the Colonies!

Myrtle Beach Fun Times: Letters to the Editor Section. Sir: I totally agree with the new immigration laws. It is about time our lawmakers did something about the illegal alienation of affection, especially from those people from Argentina. Sincerely, Ginny Sanford First Lady of SC (divorced) Sir: I have been a life long motorcyclist and avid believer in not wearing a helmet. Af...
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Funny story: Cheese Roll Causes Chaos

Cheese Roll Causes Chaos

Gloucestershire - Chaos broke out today in Gloucestershire when the 2010 Cheese Rolling Contest got out of control. A crowd of 15.000 watched in horror as the cheeses began to mow down the competitors. The event had been originally cancelled...
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« May 2010 June 2010 Jul 2010 »
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60
2nd
57
3rd
63
4th
62
5th
68
6th
63
7th
59
8th
56
9th
70
10th
73
11th
55
12th
42
13th
57
14th
71
15th
60
16th
75
17th
57
18th
58
19th
44
20th
57
21st
60
22nd
64
23rd
50
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80
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27
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