Funny story: Philadelphia Eagles To Host Funeral For Giants' Playoff Hopes. F--kers.

Philadelphia Eagles To Host Funeral For Giants' Playoff Hopes. F--kers.

In an unbelievable act of selflessness and comaraderie, the Philadelphia Eagles have charitably agreed to host a funeral for the New York Giants playoff hopes, which died in the New Meadowlands Sunday, during the Eagles record-breaking comeback to be...
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Funny story: Deck The Halls With Boughs Of Hexavalent Chromium, Fa La La La La, La La La La.

Deck The Halls With Boughs Of Hexavalent Chromium, Fa La La La La, La La La La.

A self-serving, 'I-told-you-so' report to be released just in time to brighten your Christmas morning states that 31 out of 35 cities whose drinking water was surveyed contains hexavalent chromium, a probable carcinogen that was made famous by Julia...
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Funny story: Paris Hilton defies Hadron Collider

Paris Hilton defies Hadron Collider

Scientists at LCH in Switzerland were elated today when a major question regarding the nature of our universe appeared to be solved. Paris Hilton's brain was hurtled through the Swiss Hadron Collider and smashed into a similar size particle at close...
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Funny story: Julian Assange schtum about anonymous DNA birth father George W Bush

Julian Assange schtum about anonymous DNA birth father George W Bush

Norfolk - (Reuterus): The halo's looking pretty damned tarnished amid reports George W Bush is Julian Assange's father. Spawned in the Australian humpback - er...outback! - Dubya-Bloody-Junior soon learned to milk the paternity for kudos and cash.
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Funny story: Leonardo DiCaprio's Girlfreind Calls Egyptians Primitive, Eygpt Claims It's an Israeli Plot of Ass Destruction.

Leonardo DiCaprio's Girlfreind Calls Egyptians Primitive, Eygpt Claims It's an Israeli Plot of Ass Destruction.

Leonardo DiCaprio's girlfriend, Bar Rafaeli was visiting Egypt when she was offended by the way the Egyptians handled their camel markets. She thought their behavior was, and is primitive. She was particularly disturbed by the way camels were, tr...
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Funny story: Supermarket lays on biggest ever Christmas dinner for 230,000 staff

Supermarket lays on biggest ever Christmas dinner for 230,000 staff

Tesco has spared no expense to treat its staff to a wonderful Christmas dinner this year, all 230,000 of them, including cleaners and shelf-stackers. 150,000 lbs of turkey was purchased from Asda, 100,000 lbs of potatoes were purchased from Penrit...
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Funny story: White Snow to be Banned!

White Snow to be Banned!

Due to numerous complaints by members of the public, white snow is to be banned due to its racist colouring and as it enters our country without the correct legislation it is likely to be deported. Levi Roots is leading the campaign by attempting...
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Funny story: Daily Mirror £100,000 Littlewoods.com Christmas Giveaway - Five Wii black consoles and Michael Jackson: The Experience games to be won

Daily Mirror £100,000 Littlewoods.com Christmas Giveaway - Five Wii black consoles and Michael Jackson: The Experience games to be won

'Daily Mirror £100,000 Littlewoods.com Christmas Giveaway - Five Wii black consoles and Michael Jackson: The Experience games to be won' This headline in the Daily Mirror could be construed as a tad racist. Five Wii black consoles mentioned in the same sentence as Michael Jackson seems a little bit Politically incorrect. Or maybe I am merely over-reacting? I mean though, why black? Michae...
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Funny story: David Beckham To Join Hull City?

David Beckham To Join Hull City?

It's the question thousands of football fans all over East Yorkshire are asking each other this evening, after former Manchester United and England star David Beckham said that he needs to be actively playing football to regain his international plac...
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Funny story: Paris Hilton sent to North Korean labour camp

Paris Hilton sent to North Korean labour camp

Socialite and sex tape star Paris Hilton has been sent to a North Korean labour camp after trying to become Kim Jong-Il's best friend. Ms Hilton wanted to become the North Korean dictator's friend after hearing about his vast fortune, luxury homes...
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Funny story: The Three Wise Men of the Spoof

The Three Wise Men of the Spoof

The story of the Three Wise Men is told every Christmas holiday season but no one is really certain that the story has any basis in reality. This makes such a story ripe for a satirical slant. Therefore, without further adieu, I bring you "The Three Wise Men of the Spoof." And it is told that in ancient times (or at least back in 2003) there was and had been a young man who believed in nothing...
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Funny story: Skating On very thin Ice!

Skating On very thin Ice!

Its almost that time of the year again-or rather next year-when ITV, that well known 'death wish' TV channel inflict their clapped out ice skating circus, "Dancing On Very Thin Ice" upon viewers yet again! Hosted as always by, Phillip 'Dorian Gray' S...
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Funny story: New Year's Honours to be Decided by X-Factor style Public Vote

New Year's Honours to be Decided by X-Factor style Public Vote

In a radical shake-up of the traditional process for selecting the recipients of Knighthoods and other honours, the British public will now be invited to help decide. A telephone vote, much like the polls used by programs such as the X-Factor and St...
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Funny story: Why elephants can't dance

Why elephants can't dance

'Ever wondered why elephant's can't dance or why hamsters can sky dive without a parachute then the historic Royal Institution Christmas Lectures will reveal all this Christmas.' Well who the bloody hell gives a flying fig whether elephants can or cannot dance? It has never been of concern to this writer and I don't think any of our readers were planning to ask an elephant out on a date anytim...
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Funny story: Hunt on for hot tub burglary gang who take a dip in victims' pools

Hunt on for hot tub burglary gang who take a dip in victims' pools

Yes, 'cheeky burglars' abound in part of England. So far they have struck four times. Each time they have made a "clean" getaway. Police are said to be looking for three 'squeaky-clean' men in their early 20s, according to forensic expert, Luk...
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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan In Rehab Rampage Rummaging for Cat Nip!

Lindsay Lohan In Rehab Rampage Rummaging for Cat Nip!

Lindsay Lohan, Hollywood's most confused former teen idol, was said to have gone on a rampage whilst still undergoing rehab in one of Beverly Hill's most exclusive get aways for wayward souls. According to an inside source, the clinic, said to be...
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Funny story: Cameron meets Union Leaders

Cameron meets Union Leaders

A Christmas Party at 10 Downing Street, with David Cameron hosting the leaders of most Trade Unions, resulted in a few carols and presents all round. 'This is great fun!' exclaimed Cameron afterwards 'I've been telling the chaps all about Eton. Th...
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Funny story: Deputy PM Nick Clegg - said to be angry about colleague Vince Cable's Strictly Come Dancing appearance - was told to "get a life" by Ann Widdecombe, yesterday

Deputy PM Nick Clegg - said to be angry about colleague Vince Cable's Strictly Come Dancing appearance - was told to "get a life" by Ann Widdecombe, yesterday

DEPUTY PM Nick Clegg - said to be angry about colleague Vince Cable's Strictly Come Dancing appearance - was told to "get a life" by Ann Widdecombe, yesterday Rumour has it that Nick is merely jealous because he has two left feet and couldn't find...
View 'Deputy PM Nick Clegg - said to be angry about colleague Vince Cable's Strictly Come Dancing appearance - was told to "get a life" by Ann Widdecombe, yesterday'
Funny story: Everyone Who Bought X-Factor Single Hunted Down

Everyone Who Bought X-Factor Single Hunted Down

LONDON - After the shocking news that the X-Factor loser won #1 in the Xmas charts, people took to the streets. "What douchebag actually buys X-Factor CDs?" said music psychologist Dave Green. "Really? It's okay... but that stuff is SHIT. SHIT. Yo...
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Funny story: Santa to Visit Only Top 2% in Income!

Santa to Visit Only Top 2% in Income!

In an announcement that rocked the world's population and destroyed the hopes of children around the globe, Santa Claus announced today that he would only be visiting the homes of the top 2% in income in the world. "I have to do it," Santa said w...
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Funny story: Julianne Hough: My Music Video Didn't Include Male Cousins

Julianne Hough: My Music Video Didn't Include Male Cousins

Hollywood - Julianne Hough's new music video wasn't good enough for Country Music Television(CMT) because it didn't include any scenes of her with her male cousins. "I forgot the number one rule in country music, and that is too make sure that yo...
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Funny story: Internet Crashes as Spoof reader count hit 666

Internet Crashes as Spoof reader count hit 666

LONDON - As the severs holding website TheSpoof.com registered that the 666th person was reading the page, the internet crashed. The outage, which caused major work startages from Los Angeles to Auckland across the globe, meant that work output de...
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Funny story: Potty Full Of Shit Found Under Boy's Bed

Potty Full Of Shit Found Under Boy's Bed

In what has been ably-described by a woman in the Potteries as "the most gruesome moment of my week", the woman from Stoke-on-Trent has told how she discovered a potty full of shit underneath her son's bed. The woman, whose name you all know, rela...
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Funny story: Massive chunk of Halley's Comet black opal orbiting eclipsed full moon

Massive chunk of Halley's Comet black opal orbiting eclipsed full moon

Area 51, Nevada - (Cool Yule News): NASA HQ sources said today a huge breakaway chunk of black opal from Halley's Comet has been detected orbiting the periphery of the moon. Its emergence comes ahead of the Winter Solstice lunar eclipse on Tuesd...
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Funny story: Gays in military ask for more fashionable fatigues

Gays in military ask for more fashionable fatigues

Washington, DC - On the high heels of the historic vote to repeal "Don't Ask, Don't Tell", openly gay troops are now pushing for the Pentagon to bring in the top fashion designers to create more stylish uniforms. Dubbing it the, "War on Utilitariani...
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Funny story: India beg England to send them some snow, they also desire their very own "White Christmas"?

India beg England to send them some snow, they also desire their very own "White Christmas"?

Bangalore Herald, Bangalore, India: The Indian government have begged (enough of them here) their ex-colonial rulers, Britain, to send them over some snow before Christmas. Hearing of the unusual heavy snow falling on the Chelsea-Man Utd game and...
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Funny story: Exclusive interview: Charles talks

Exclusive interview: Charles talks

In an exclusive interview with whatinthe world, HRH Prince Charles,Prince of Wales, has let off steam about various celebrities and other members of the aristocracy. A number of popular personalities come in for verbal abuse from the future King of England and its unseemly what he really thinks of them. "Oh, you know, that blasted Susan Boyle, what an appropriate surname that is. She really is...
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Funny story: Carpet Found Under Boy's Bed

Carpet Found Under Boy's Bed

A woman in the Potteries has today described the moment when she discovered that the floorboards underneath her son's bed were covered with carpet. Karen Low-Cal, 46, mother of Child C, who has behavioural problems, told how she had been clearing...
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Funny story: UN award India with "World's Hugest Public Rubbish Tip" prize!

UN award India with "World's Hugest Public Rubbish Tip" prize!

Bangalore Herald, Bangalore, India: The UN have awarded one of the world's most prestigious prizes back to India for the 5th time, a record. The prize they received was the title of "The World's Hugest Rubbish Tip", which they have proudly held fo...
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Funny story: The Day the Earth Stood Still OR Panic Around the World As All Holes Disappear

The Day the Earth Stood Still OR Panic Around the World As All Holes Disappear

The World was in a state of panic yesterday. People in every nook and cranny of this wonderous globe woke up to find 'all holes missing'. People wandered happily, into doughnut shops, unaware of the issue, and came out crestfallen. No holes in their doughnuts meant that they weren't really doughnuts after all. As they looked around them and discussed the situation, many admitted they had...
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Funny story: Prince Harry To Marry Slut, April 28

Prince Harry To Marry Slut, April 28

London, England - Britain's Prince Harry says he will marry a common slut on April 28, the day before his brother's wedding. The younger prince says he means no disrespect to his elder brother and his betrothed, he simply "needs a good shag". The s...
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Funny story: Pride in Craftsmanship Outdated by Overwhelming Production.

Pride in Craftsmanship Outdated by Overwhelming Production.

It has been discovered that, Just Good Enough, has taken over the outdated, "Pride in Craftsmanship", credo. Craftsmanship was the work ethic of a generation gone past. Mass production is the cry of today, Faster, Cheaper, More. Anyone can look in...
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Funny story: Sending Coats to Newcastle

Sending Coats to Newcastle

The weather in Britain continues to plumb new depths and cause the bottom to fall out of thermometers. With temperatures plummeting to minus twenty, setting records as it goes, the people of Newcastle, effectively referred to as Geordies, have procla...
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Funny story: Bankers Face Bonus Clampdown

Bankers Face Bonus Clampdown

As George Osborne and Vince Cable sing a duet on the action they will take if the Banks pay their top executives massive bonuses for Christmas, Bankers are preparing themselves for an austere Christmas. 'No turkey for us' revealed one top Banker '...
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Funny story: Louie Spence And David Hasselhoff Panto "Pile Of Crap" Say Experts

Louie Spence And David Hasselhoff Panto "Pile Of Crap" Say Experts

Mincing TV dance "star" Louie Spence has been given a resounding thumbs-down by panto reviewers. The choreographer and 'TV personality,' who emerged from Sky's fly-on-the-wall series Pineapple Dance Studios, is appearing in Peter Pan at the Wimble...
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Funny story: White Christmas Fear For Britain

White Christmas Fear For Britain

The lines of the famous old song are ringing out in the aisles of every department store and supermarket in Britain, but it's the harsh reality that has got tongues wagging in bitter complaint as the whole country remains enveloped in a white shroud...
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Funny story: Bogey Found Under Boy's Bed

Bogey Found Under Boy's Bed

It's what the parent of every knows is there but is unable to locate, but when one Stoke-on-Trent mum had a delve around under her son's bed yesterday, she got a good deal more than she bargained for - a bogey the size of a tennis ball! Karen Low-...
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Funny story: Is Katy Perry Pregnant?

Is Katy Perry Pregnant?

Rumours are rife across the internet that Katy Perry is pregnant, and due to give birth to Russell Brand's child sometime in June 2011, however the couple strongly deny the rumour. A close friend of the Brands has revealed that the rumours are tru...
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Funny story: Andrex Puppies' College Fund In Peril As TV Ad Goes CGI

Andrex Puppies' College Fund In Peril As TV Ad Goes CGI

The UK's Golden Labrador population is barking mad over a change of direction in toilet roll advertising. And they claim 'ruff' treatment by the advertisers is putting young Labradors' futures in danger. For years, TV viewers have enjoyed the a...
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Funny story: Kings of Leon revealed to have no royal connection at all

Kings of Leon revealed to have no royal connection at all

Popular beat combo, Kings of Leon have been asked to change their name to just Leon after it has been revealed that the French city does not have one royal person, never mind four separate kings. "It is an atrocity that these Followill brothers ar...
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Funny story: Alien Marine Vessels Spotted off Corsican Coast Prompt 'Sea-Trek' Investigation

Alien Marine Vessels Spotted off Corsican Coast Prompt 'Sea-Trek' Investigation

Reports of sea-going vessels traveling at speeds of more than 150 knots off the coast of Corsica in the Mediterranean Sea have local officials and alien hunters alike staked out to see for themselves if the rumors are true. Traveling at unbelievab...
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Funny story: Dustin Hoffman, Danny DeVito, And Katie Couric Star In The "R" Rated Seasonal Classic, "Christmas Elves From Hell"

Dustin Hoffman, Danny DeVito, And Katie Couric Star In The "R" Rated Seasonal Classic, "Christmas Elves From Hell"

HOLLYOOD - The Hallmark Channel has just announced that they will be presenting the seasonal classic, Christmas Elves From Hell. The film is loosely based on the book by noted Christmas elf writer Devereux F. Haystack who has also penned other hol...
View 'Dustin Hoffman, Danny DeVito, And Katie Couric Star In The "R" Rated Seasonal Classic, "Christmas Elves From Hell"'
Funny story: Cheryl Cole Faints During 'TSA Pat Down' At LAX Airport

Cheryl Cole Faints During 'TSA Pat Down' At LAX Airport

LOS ANGELES - Cheryl Cole was at LAX airport on her way to catch a flight to New York City to meet with her boyfriend Derek Hough. Hough had flown to the 'Big Apple' to accept an ABC Network award for being the best dancer on network television.
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Funny story: "Sarah Palin's Frozen Alaska" The Wilderness Woman Shows She Can Dog Mush With The Best of 'Em

"Sarah Palin's Frozen Alaska" The Wilderness Woman Shows She Can Dog Mush With The Best of 'Em

WASILLA, Alaska - After watching Sarah Palin's latest episode of her hit reality show Sarah Palin's Frozen Alaska, I am beginning to wonder why she would ever remotely want to be president of the United States knowing that it will greatly cut into th...
View '"Sarah Palin's Frozen Alaska" The Wilderness Woman Shows She Can Dog Mush With The Best of 'Em'
Funny story: Microscopic Organism Found Under Boy's Bed

Microscopic Organism Found Under Boy's Bed

Scientists have called on the government to allocate 'special funds' towards new research after a previously-unknown microscopic organism was discovered under the bed of a 9-year-old boy in Stoke-on-Trent at the weekend. The organism, which is unl...
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Funny story: Tony McCoy's 2010 BBC Sports Personality Of The Year Award Shows Public's Complete Lack Of Interest In Sport

Tony McCoy's 2010 BBC Sports Personality Of The Year Award Shows Public's Complete Lack Of Interest In Sport

There were grave concerns over the public's distinct and complete lack of interest in 'real sport' this morning, after Grand National winner Tony McCoy was voted the 2010 BBC Sports Personality of the Year. For those who didn't know, the Grand Nat...
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Funny story: TheSpoof.com Scribe Has No Idea How Points System Works

TheSpoof.com Scribe Has No Idea How Points System Works

Irregular TheSpoof.com donor, CrepeSalivator, has confessed that he has "absolutely no clue" how the POINTS SYSTEM works on the website. "Somehow I managed to get approximately two-million points during a three-year stretch when I was distracted.
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Funny story: US Cell Phone Industry Declares Bankruptcy

US Cell Phone Industry Declares Bankruptcy

New York NY: Domestic cell phone companies and the US subsidiaries of foreign cell phone companies stocks violently plummeted on the New York Stock Exchange (NYSE) today. Soon after this event all these electronics companies declared bankruptcy. R...
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Funny story: Barney Frank Goes To West Point: Tells Cadets To Pucker Up

Barney Frank Goes To West Point: Tells Cadets To Pucker Up

70 year old Barney Frank announced today that he was resigning from Congress and will be entering the Military Academy at West Point this fall, becoming the oldest plebe since the opening of the Academy. In doing so, he will be commissioned an offic...
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Funny story: Boehner, Bachmann, Huckabee, and King Protest List of "Haters"

Boehner, Bachmann, Huckabee, and King Protest List of "Haters"

(Hate Group Monthly) - Several House Republicans are outraged that the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) has added four groups to a nationwide database of colored pins on the map. This brings the number of hate groups in the U.S. even closer to t...
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Funny story: Balotelli: "F*ck it I'll quit"

Balotelli: "F*ck it I'll quit"

Manchester City's wantaway striker Mario Balotelli has issued a threat to his employers in his latest verbal attack on the club. Balotelli said, "I wana go Milan and if that lot aren't going to sell me, then f*ck it I'll retire. It's just a job in...
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