Funny story: Pentagon Buys J.D. Salinger's Toilet for $1 Million

Pentagon Buys J.D. Salinger's Toilet for $1 Million

The Pentagon today announced that in keeping with the President's unofficial request to keep spending to a minimum, it would henceforth be purchasing many items used from the popular auction site, eBay at considerably less than they would cost if bou...
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Funny story: Hog Jaw, Arkansas Lights Cause Major Frights

Hog Jaw, Arkansas Lights Cause Major Frights

Locals in Hog Jaw, Arkansas, have witnessed strange lights in the night sky this Tuesday last. Cletus Albright, forester, told us "well, I guess I shooda taken a picyture wit' ma telephone, but Mary-Lou was yakkin' to her momma, and wouldn't let m...
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Funny story: Mooning Oz Scientist's puckered 'freckle' mistaken as newly-discovered Moon crater

Mooning Oz Scientist's puckered 'freckle' mistaken as newly-discovered Moon crater

SYDNEY, OZ: As his fellow scientists hollered: "Show us your freckle, luv", obliging Oz astronomer Freddie 'Feckin' Feckless lowered his drawers and revealed his puckered freckle to the world. Freddie, who has spent a life-time searching the skie...
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Funny story: Convicted terrorist freed on compassionate grounds because he has dandruff

Convicted terrorist freed on compassionate grounds because he has dandruff

Convicted Libyan terrorist Abu Abas Abat Abamus Abatis Abant was released from a Scottish prison yesterday on compassionate grounds, because he suffers from dandruff. An Al Qaeda doctor had previously pronounced that Abant had less than 3 weeks to...
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Funny story: Drowning Pak continues deceitful blame-game - says "US-India-Afghanistan sending floods to destroy the nation"!

Drowning Pak continues deceitful blame-game - says "US-India-Afghanistan sending floods to destroy the nation"!

UN HQ: - Paranoidistan's big buffoon top-cat, Madman Showcat Querulous polished up his begging bowl and stood before the assembly lecturing the world on its "failures" of not providing enough aid to save the already-failed state. In the continuing...
View 'Drowning Pak continues deceitful blame-game - says "US-India-Afghanistan sending floods to destroy the nation"!'
Funny story: Joe Cole Proves He's A Crap Penalty Taker - Cheryl Cole Says 'Dancing' Derek Hough Would Have Made A Better Job Of It

Joe Cole Proves He's A Crap Penalty Taker - Cheryl Cole Says 'Dancing' Derek Hough Would Have Made A Better Job Of It

Latest news - final score not in yet. Liverpool FC, leading 1-0 from a Ryan Babel goal on half time uncharacteristically playing for a penalty at the Kop end in their Europa League tie against Trabzonspor, from somewhere in the back of beyond, were s...
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Funny story: Glenn Beck's Wife Mowed Down by Angry Connecticut Motorist

Glenn Beck's Wife Mowed Down by Angry Connecticut Motorist

NEW CANAAN, Connecticut -- A furious man in a borrowed car ran Glenn Beck's wife Tania over in front of the controversial commentator's $4.2 million colonial mansion Tuesday morning, according to a police report. While listening to Beck's morning...
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Funny story: Kirstie Alley To Enter Boston Marathon

Kirstie Alley To Enter Boston Marathon

Some people are very concerned about Kirstie Alley entering the next Boston Marathon but Kirstie says that she will be fine. "All you have to do is enter the thing and you'll help obese people everywhere begin to think that they can do things too.
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Funny story: Dr, Laura and Niger native get married

Dr, Laura and Niger native get married

Niamey, Niger - Niger French speaking newspaper is reporting that two weeks ago radio personality Dr. Laura married twenty eight year old Nigel Samanya. A native of the western Africa republic of Niger. Nigel a Maracas and Vuvuzuela instructor a...
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Funny story: Miley Cyrus Setting Web For Justin Bieber, "Come On Over!"

Miley Cyrus Setting Web For Justin Bieber, "Come On Over!"

After having her latest live-in boyfriend Liam Hemsworth thrown out after a confrontation with her dad, Miley Cyrus has been threatening to move out. However, it seems that she has suddenly eyeballed 16-year-old Justin Bieber. "I just love the way...
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Funny story: Crocodile Dundee says Fair Dinkum Mate - as he does the nasty with latest Sheila - fellow Aussie Crocodile Vicki

Crocodile Dundee says Fair Dinkum Mate - as he does the nasty with latest Sheila - fellow Aussie Crocodile Vicki

MELBOURNE: Soul-mates are hard to find; even harder to keep. Especially if you're into the creepy-crawly-scaly. And if you're not the full quid - well mate that's fair dinkum. But Crocodile Mick Dundee was all smiles today as he told reporters...
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Funny story: High Mass "Hi-Jinks" Mar Hog Jaw First Communion Service

High Mass "Hi-Jinks" Mar Hog Jaw First Communion Service

HOG JAW, ARKANSAS (ABSNN) -- Jesus was always known to have a funny story with which to illustrate His otherwise, insane agenda of Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men (but not to Yankees, faggots, harlots, thieves, communists, Mad Dogs and Englishmen, th...
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Funny story: Snooki's Charges Misrepresented By Major News Agencies

Snooki's Charges Misrepresented By Major News Agencies

It doesn't matter that "Jersey Shore" castmember Snooki Polizzi looks like a tangerine-colored manatee. She is now a defendant in a quasi-criminal case before a New Jersey Municipal court, and the major news agencies are too busy making jokes about...
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Funny story: Miley Cyrus In Cell Phone Crisis - Her Father Threatens To Take Away Her Cell Phone

Miley Cyrus In Cell Phone Crisis - Her Father Threatens To Take Away Her Cell Phone

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Teen singing sensation and all around publicity queen Miley Cyrus is literally fit to be tied, but not in a perverted way. It seems that Miley's daddy, former 90s singer Billy Ray Cyrus is upset that every time he calls up to tal...
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Funny story: UPDATE: Hog Jaw People and Places

UPDATE: Hog Jaw People and Places

To keep everyone in the loop on who's who and what's what in Hog Jaw, Arkansas, here is a list of the characters so far that have come to life on the Spoof pages. I've updated it. From this point forward, I'll start a thread for updates instead of writing a new magazine article for the updates. that may work better. i will keep a master list of the list up to date and anyone needing a copy can PM...
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Funny story: Natalie Portman girl-on-girl lezzer kiss

Natalie Portman girl-on-girl lezzer kiss

This will set tongues wagging! Natalie Portman locks lips in a sexy girl-on-girl scene in the eagerly-anticipated thriller exploring the cut-throat world of ballet. Ballet, once thought to be the upper class, top nobs art form, is actually a seet...
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Funny story: Black Bear Escape gets Grizzly

Black Bear Escape gets Grizzly

Koala Lumpur - An American black bear became enraged this weekend at a Malaysian zoo and broke out of it's enclosure after being taunted by a twelve year old boy who tossed caramel corn just out of reach of the tormented beast. The agitated ursa l...
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Funny story: John Terry mistaken for giant rat and shot on West Yorkshire housing estate

John Terry mistaken for giant rat and shot on West Yorkshire housing estate

Footballer John Terry is recovering after being shot on a housing estate in West Yorkshire. The former England captain was mistaken for a 30 inch rat that had infested the area. Brandon Goddard, 31, who shot Terry, said voluminous vermin have been...
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Funny story: US survey certain that Obama is a Muslim and his wife wearing a burka didn't help either!

US survey certain that Obama is a Muslim and his wife wearing a burka didn't help either!

The majority of US citizens believe that President Obama is a Muslim in disguise, shock, horror! A recent survey proved the point and now Obama is attempting to enhance this belief by allowing a mosque to be built adjacent to the 9/11 site (whatev...
View 'US survey certain that Obama is a Muslim and his wife wearing a burka didn't help either!'
Funny story: Lily Allen gets lashed,... whip lashed, that is.

Lily Allen gets lashed,... whip lashed, that is.

Poor LILY ALLEN has been treated for painful whiplash following an incident at a London hotel. The singer was in the lobby of the plush hotel following a meeting to discuss her proposed summer slapper clothes store. Trooper Lil was convinced sh...
View 'Lily Allen gets lashed,... whip lashed, that is.'
Funny story: Local Progressive Group Gets A Mouthful!

Local Progressive Group Gets A Mouthful!

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - The liberal activist group, Progressive Democrats of America (PDA), got more than they bargained for after challenging the local "Teabagging Right-Wing-Nuts (RWNs)" to a contest. PDA threw down the gauntlet on Monday and challe...
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Funny story: Twat who fell off mountain says "Fuck"

Twat who fell off mountain says "Fuck"

One moment adventurer Ben De Buses was standing on top of some mountain ogling at the world below and having a friend take his photograph on an iPhone to be uploaded to the Internet. The next moment, he was falling thousands of feet into a chasm.
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Funny story: Dope smoking, stoned bears guard Canadian marijuana farm

Dope smoking, stoned bears guard Canadian marijuana farm

Police raiding a marijuana farm in western Canada were astonished to find bears apparently guarding it. However initial alarm wore off when officers realised the 10 or so bears did not behave aggressively and were in fact docile and tame due to b...
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Funny story: Everyone will get A stars in A levels from now

Everyone will get A stars in A levels from now

Everyone will get A stars in A levels from now, it has been announced. The Government decided that the old system, whereby some students got Bs, Cs, Ds and ever less, was unfair, since it discriminates against candidates according to how clever th...
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Funny story: Stingy Blair Blasted for Donating Millions

Stingy Blair Blasted for Donating Millions

FORMER Prime Minister Tony Blair has been lambasted for donating all the proceeds from his memoirs to a veterans charity. Although British workers have been donating up to a half of everything they earn to a similar charity for their entire workin...
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Funny story: Three In Five In US Believe Obama Is Muslim - Two In Five Believe He's Black!

Three In Five In US Believe Obama Is Muslim - Two In Five Believe He's Black!

A ever-growing number of Americans say they believe President Barack Obama is a Muslim, with many people also believing he is black, claims research. A poll found that 59% said the president was a Muslim, up from 11% in March 2009, with 35% saying...
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Funny story: Shock: Devonshire Man Wins Lottery

Shock: Devonshire Man Wins Lottery

A Devonshire man has told us of the moment he won the National Lottery. Dennis Rubbery, 67, was knocked spang out of his slippers when the news came that he was a winner. "I couldn't ruddy believe it," he beamed, "it's changed my life, really i...
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Funny story: Foreign Shrine at Attack Site Angers Many

Foreign Shrine at Attack Site Angers Many

A proposed Japanese Buddhist Temple (1) to be built near the U.S. Arizona Memorial(2) has angered many residents of Hawaii (3) and across the country. The builders of the proposed site, however, say that it is private property and that they do have...
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Funny story: Wetwang Man Had Jar Stuck On Head For Thirty Years - And A Bear Up His Arse For Twenty!

Wetwang Man Had Jar Stuck On Head For Thirty Years - And A Bear Up His Arse For Twenty!

Stories currently circulating the internet about a bear that had a jar stuck on its head, or about a jar that had a bear stuck on its head, have prompted a Wetwang man to tell his own extraordinary tale about a jar he has kept on his head for the las...
View 'Wetwang Man Had Jar Stuck On Head For Thirty Years - And A Bear Up His Arse For Twenty!'
Funny story: Mary-Kate Olsen: My Childhood Sucked. "Those big sacks of money were sooo heavy!"

Mary-Kate Olsen: My Childhood Sucked. "Those big sacks of money were sooo heavy!"

Mary-Kate Olsen, 1/2 of a twin-sister acting team so bereft of talent it took two of them to play one character, is bitching and moaning to Marie Claire about how much the childhood she had --which earned her about $400 million-- "Whaaah, poor me...
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Funny story: Kanye, Fifty and Justin Bieber Collaborate on New Teenage CD

Kanye, Fifty and Justin Bieber Collaborate on New Teenage CD

Carrying the working title, "I Wanna Hug You All Night", it was clear that adult market rappers, Kanye West and Fifty Cent, were looking to expand to the teenage and pre-teen audiences through a newly formed collaboration with Justin Bieber. Secre...
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Funny story: Hog Jaw Mania Grips Krakow, Poland

Hog Jaw Mania Grips Krakow, Poland

Nobody understands it. Nobody can explain the sudden upsurge in popularity of the township of Hog Jaw, Arkansas, USA - least of all the residents of Krakow in southern Poland. Tee-shirt vendors in the Polish city can't get hold of enough 'I heart...
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Funny story: Blair To Donate Life Story Cash To Army

Blair To Donate Life Story Cash To Army

Big hearted former Prime Minister, Tony Blair, has today announced that he will donate all the proceeds of his memoirs to the Armed Forces in a bid to drive up falling recruitment numbers. Brave The peace loving ex Premier said "Those poor boys...
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Funny story: Record A Level Results Announced

Record A Level Results Announced

Remarkable results this year for A level results as 100% of papers were awarded A* grades. Speaking on behalf of the Department for Education Mr C Dick said "All this nonsense about papers getting easier is very frustrating. These exams are reall...
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Funny story: Hellfire Club Regiment clue links Lord Lucan to Julie Ward death probe

Hellfire Club Regiment clue links Lord Lucan to Julie Ward death probe

London - (Foren (sic) News): Anonymous DNA samples found in the 7th Earl of Lucan's Chelsea home have surfaced in the Masai Mara game reserve. The Kenyan safari site saw Suffolk hotelier's daughter Julie Ward killed in 1988 in what still remains a...
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Funny story: Cheryl's Tapeworm Graham releases single

Cheryl's Tapeworm Graham releases single

Things are hotting up nicely for Cheryl Cole's new friend, tapeworm Graham as they release a new duet today following his success in Celebrity Big Brother. "It seems like the next natural step really." Said Graham. "Cheryl's been a great mentor fo...
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Funny story: Taylor Swift: Sure I'd Get My Boobs Fixed For Taylor Lautner

Taylor Swift: Sure I'd Get My Boobs Fixed For Taylor Lautner

Mutual friends say that Taylor Swift and Taylor Lautner are still seeing each other and are even more serious than a year ago. At the time the two were overwhelmed by the paparazzi and schedules so that they were forced to give it up and get back...
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Funny story: Shock: Wind Causes Cornish Tree To Bend

Shock: Wind Causes Cornish Tree To Bend

A sudden and shocking gust of wind in a small cornish village caused a usually straight standing tree to 'lean dramatically'. Eyewitness Kenwyn Cribbs told us "we were all in the pub when this gust came whippin' by! Next thing ol' leafy, thats the...
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Funny story: Long awaited verdict from the B.M.A.

Long awaited verdict from the B.M.A.

The long believed theory that all footballers are born with congenital brain defects has been disproved by the British Medical Council after thousands of extensive tests lasting over thirty seven years. Some are actually quite normal when born, a...
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Funny story: Entrepreneur Plans Raoul Moat Theme Park

Entrepreneur Plans Raoul Moat Theme Park

Residents of Rothbury, Northumberland, are up in arms over plans for a new theme park, "Moatland." Raoul Moat shot himself near the village after murdering his former girlfriend and her boyfriend earlier this year. Since the incidents, a ghouli...
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Funny story: Spend, Spend, Spend

Spend, Spend, Spend

Leaders of the Grey Economy are advising people 'of a certain age' to stop saving and spend. Not only will this help to revive the ailing economy it will mean they can apply for all the benefits being taken away because they have too much saved to...
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Funny story: Stig In BBC Sights?

Stig In BBC Sights?

BBC chiefs have denied that they are prepared to go to any lengths to keep the identity of one of its stars a secret. They are involved in a legal battle to prevent Top Gear mystery driver, The Stig, from revealing his identity in a planned autobi...
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Funny story: Big Soapy Yawn

Big Soapy Yawn

Revelations concerning an "attempted" murder in the six millionth episode of Ozzie soap Neighbours have been greeted with a wave of indifference. Long-term character, Paul Robinson, is to be pushed off a balcony at Lassiters hotel complex by an en...
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Funny story: Hog Jaw, Arkansas's Civil War Re-Enactment Goes Haywire And The Cannon Blows The Hell Out of The Cornbread Movie House

Hog Jaw, Arkansas's Civil War Re-Enactment Goes Haywire And The Cannon Blows The Hell Out of The Cornbread Movie House

HOG JAW, Arkansas - Well sad to report that The 147th Annual Civil War Re-Enactment of The Battle of Hog Jaw Creek ended on kind of a somber note this year. The original battle was fought on August 19, 1863, between the members of The 13th Arkansa...
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Funny story: Bar Patron's Urine Magical Juice for Prolific Corn Plant

Bar Patron's Urine Magical Juice for Prolific Corn Plant

A single corn stalk plant that is growing in front of a tavern in Mason City, Iowa was discovered to have 27 ears of corn growing on it-that is approximately 25 ears more than any other average corn stalk has growing on it in a growing season. The...
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Funny story: Pink Rupee makes everyone Gay in India

Pink Rupee makes everyone Gay in India

The Pink Rupee is on the rise, according to business trackers in India. Though this piece of information may make the Rainbow people in La La land happy and Gay, insiders say that the depraved West shouldn't assume too much. "Our twenty rupee not...
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Funny story: Ann Coulter Sells Soul to Gay GOP

Ann Coulter Sells Soul to Gay GOP

Ann Coulter has been dropped like a hot potato by one right-wing website because she has agreed to speak to a gay GOP group. Originally scheduled to speak at the "Taking America Back National Conference," Coulter was told her services as a speaker wo...
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Funny story: VH1 Cancels Fantasia Barrino's Reality Show "Fantasia For Real"

VH1 Cancels Fantasia Barrino's Reality Show "Fantasia For Real"

HIGH POINT, North Carolina - VH1 has decided to cancel Fantasia Barrino's reality show after just one season. The producer of Fantasia For Real, Dexter Pettyjohn, said that last week Miss Barrino got just a little bit to real with her suicide atte...
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Funny story: Musical Bombshell - Kanye West Is Dating Taylor Momsen

Musical Bombshell - Kanye West Is Dating Taylor Momsen

BOISE, Idaho - Kanye West was in Boise, Idaho performing at The Mashed Potatoes Arena when he was asked about the rumor that he was dating Courtney Love lookalike Taylor Momsen. West, grinned and shook his head and said that he isn't really dating...
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Funny story: Kenny 'Cheatin' Chesney Whoopin' It Up With Another Gal Pal Down In Cancun, Mexico?

Kenny 'Cheatin' Chesney Whoopin' It Up With Another Gal Pal Down In Cancun, Mexico?

CANCUN, Mexico - Country music singer Kenny Chesney who sings about tractors, and plows, and crop rotating, can now sing about the age old country music tradition of 'cheatin'. Chesney, who wears a cowboy hat to hide his bald head, kinda like Tim...
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Funny story: Bin Ladens and the USA screwing up things in Pakistan?

Bin Ladens and the USA screwing up things in Pakistan?

Washington: There is absolutely no truth in reports that The United States is helping the Bin Ladens to turn the screws on Pakistani Prime Minister Geelani, reliable sources in the White House have told this correspondent. "It's a well known fact...
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Funny story: Isle Of Wight News - Hog Jaw Arkansas Twinning "Never Really An Option" Says Ryde Kebab Shop Proprietor.

Isle Of Wight News - Hog Jaw Arkansas Twinning "Never Really An Option" Says Ryde Kebab Shop Proprietor.

Ryde kebab and pizzeria shop proprietor Ali Bullo, today pitched his views in on the failed twinning bid between Ryde, Isle of Wight and Hog Jaw, Arkansas, USA. Ali Bullo, creator of the Full English Breakfast pizza contacted IOWN to say that he w...
View 'Isle Of Wight News - Hog Jaw Arkansas Twinning "Never Really An Option" Says Ryde Kebab Shop Proprietor.'
Funny story: Amy Winehouse Gave My GPS Unit AIDS!

Amy Winehouse Gave My GPS Unit AIDS!

I used to have a Harmon-Kardon GPS unit. I mean, I still have it, but Amy Winehouse gave it AIDS. Now, Harmon-Kardon is well-known for their audio equipment, and that is exactly why I bought a H-K GPS unit. GPS Magazine reviewed my GPS, and its verdict is, "Not Bad. Not Great. Plays Videos." Indeed, it is the "Not Great" and "Plays Videos" aspects that have sent me to electronics stores t...
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Funny story: The End Of Days fo H&R Block? High Put/Call Ratio Means Wall Street Expects HRB Stock to Tank! Put/Call ratio at 13.83:1

The End Of Days fo H&R Block? High Put/Call Ratio Means Wall Street Expects HRB Stock to Tank! Put/Call ratio at 13.83:1

For those that hold shares in the United States' largest tax return preparation company, H&R Block, they've become used to watching their net-worth flushed away, day after day, down the Kansas City company's crapper. From a 52-week high of $23.2...
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Funny story: Buckner Triplets Volunteer For Kissing Booth At Squirrel Holler County Fair

Buckner Triplets Volunteer For Kissing Booth At Squirrel Holler County Fair

The Buckner sisters (Maybelline, Avon, and Mary Kaye) of Hog Jaw, Arkansas have volunteered to man the kissing booth at this year's Squirrel Holler County Fair. The aim of this year's booth is to raise money for a hair transplant for Rusty Lefferts.
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Funny story: Spoof Writers In Revolt - Demand Permanent Reinstatement Of Fergus McCarthy As Featured Writer

Spoof Writers In Revolt - Demand Permanent Reinstatement Of Fergus McCarthy As Featured Writer

Writers for satirical online website theSpoof.com were threatening to pack away their keyboards in disgust last night after the run of popular Spoofer and forum philosopher Fergus McCarthy as Featured Writer came to a premature end. "I'm really an...
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Funny story: New study shows Meerkats cannot use the Internet

New study shows Meerkats cannot use the Internet

Myth, legend and now folly surround the rituals of meerkats, as a new study firmly slams the browser shut on their on line behaviour. The study was commissioned by 67 yr old Arthur Jones of Ribblesthwaite Road, Ostwaldtwistle, Lancashire who was f...
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Funny story: Hog Jaw, Alabama declares war on Hog Jaw, Arkansas…Bloodbath feared!

Hog Jaw, Alabama declares war on Hog Jaw, Arkansas…Bloodbath feared!

HOG JAW, ALABAMA (ABSNN) -- Fred Fortineer, Adjudant of the Sons of the American Legion Post 1950, in Hog Jaw, Alabama led a group of 14 pick up trucks filled with young men eager to fight it out with the Hog Jaw, Arkansas Boy Scout Troop 2. A blood...
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Funny story: Isle Of Wight News - Ryde Turns Down Twin-Town Offer From Hog Jaw Arkansas

Isle Of Wight News - Ryde Turns Down Twin-Town Offer From Hog Jaw Arkansas

Mayor Vernon Adcock, the first openly gay Mayor of Ryde today announced that Ryde had politely declined offers to be twinned with the township of Hog Jaw, Arkansas, USA. Mayor Adcock, speaking on behalf of Ryde Council, explained that the problem...
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