Funny story: Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, Norris McWhirter and the Eohippus Quest

Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, Norris McWhirter and the Eohippus Quest

Gaunt, enigmatic, sexually-charged Twilight couple Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart have been looking high and low for a suitable pet, a source close to the Daily Effluent told me yesterday. Unfortunately, their search was diligent but fruit...
View 'Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, Norris McWhirter and the Eohippus Quest'
Funny story: Malcolm McLaren buried at Highate Cemetery next to Jane Fonda

Malcolm McLaren buried at Highate Cemetery next to Jane Fonda

London - (RIP Mess): A plot reserved for the Kray Twins' PR guru was hastily sequestered by the McLaren family following a tense stand-off between HM tax inspectors and the Public Records Orifice in Kew. McLaren, 69, was buried next to 70s movie d...
View 'Malcolm McLaren buried at Highate Cemetery next to Jane Fonda'
Funny story: Charges Against Cheerleader Implicated in "TattooGate" Turn Out To Be Unfounded

Charges Against Cheerleader Implicated in "TattooGate" Turn Out To Be Unfounded

DALLAS - A prominent football organization has issued a statement to the national media stating that the rumor about one of their cheerleaders being involved with Jesse James "TattooGate" scandal is totally without basis. Agnes Lulu Webbsnicker sp...
View 'Charges Against Cheerleader Implicated in "TattooGate" Turn Out To Be Unfounded'
Funny story: President Obama Celebrates Earth Day by Promising to Legalize Marijuana

President Obama Celebrates Earth Day by Promising to Legalize Marijuana

"Today, as we celebrate Earth Day, we must keep in mind all the wonderful plants and weeds that Mother Nature has provided for us for medicinal purposes, some of which are perfectly legal to use at our disposal, while others may have to wait just a tad longer to become a part of our own personal medicine chests." "While I don't wish to make light of the seriousness of whether or not marijuana s...
View 'President Obama Celebrates Earth Day by Promising to Legalize Marijuana'
Funny story: Catholic priests disappointed with Pope

Catholic priests disappointed with Pope

A Catholic priest, who shall remain anonymous, expressed his disappointment with the Pope and his comments about priests child sexual abuse today in a short letter. "Dear Pope What happened to you man? You weren't always like this. Remember when we used to go on long rides with only a tank full of gas, six pack of beer, two kids and a lot of loving in our hearts? Those were the happy days, t...
View 'Catholic priests disappointed with Pope'
Funny story: Tea Party Protests Earth Day

Tea Party Protests Earth Day

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington, D.C. - Tea Party protesters gathered in Washington today to protest Earth Day which they claim is a "Liberul, Commie, Socialist, Marxist, Nazi" plot to destroy America and the Constitution. They carried signs, some of the more prominent being the following: "Eurth Day is Marxist Burth Day" "Globul Warming is a Commie Lie" "Envirunmentulists are taking jobs...
View 'Tea Party Protests Earth Day'
Funny story: Duchess of York - New Force in US Politics?

Duchess of York - New Force in US Politics?

Not to be outdone by Sarah Palin, the Duchess of York, Sarah Ferguson, has announced that she wants her own US TV series. According to Reuters, she said to reporters, that she wants to enter into the political debate over the state of American societ...
View 'Duchess of York - New Force in US Politics?'
Funny story: Alternative View: Scotland Against Crooked Lawyers

Alternative View: Scotland Against Crooked Lawyers

A man has been arrested twice for trying to expose a massive cover up of the abuse by paedophiles of a young girl called Holly Grieg. This has been covered up because people in high places could lose their jobs Robert Green is now standing at the General Election as a candidate in Aberdeen against the sitting Labour candidate. Mr Green is sitting under the banner Scotland against crooked law...
View 'Alternative View: Scotland Against Crooked Lawyers'
Funny story: The Agony

The Agony

Dear Bonnie Contention, I have this problem where I find myself asking perilously under-qualified people for advice. What's your advice? Yours desperately, Hope Toodye Dear Hope, I am a big fan of lubrication. It makes things run more smoothly, you can last longer and enjoy every second rather than anticipating perhaps a less comfortable moment in sex. Every day I meet people purcha...
View 'The Agony'
Funny story: Seven Year old expelled from school for lewdness

Seven Year old expelled from school for lewdness

A seven-year old girl has been expelled from her primary school for her lewd behaviour. Miss X was caught in the girls' toilets on a number of occasions, looking under the doors into the occupied stalls. Children in the toilet stalls were obvio...
View 'Seven Year old expelled from school for lewdness'
Funny story: Gay magazine reviews UK election candidates

Gay magazine reviews UK election candidates

Gay magazine "Ass-lover monthly" has printed a review of the leaders of the three main parties who are competing for the up and coming UK election. They said, "David Cameron has a cherubic boyish face, which would look delicious with semen drippin...
View 'Gay magazine reviews UK election candidates'
Funny story: University Students Carry Out a Variety of Surveys in Toronto

University Students Carry Out a Variety of Surveys in Toronto

This past two months U of T students have been carrying out a variety of surveys on the streets of Toronto. Data being collected covers such topics as, 'Opinions on Medical Health Services', 'Women's Issues', 'Discipline in Schools', 'Quality of care in Nursing Homes', 'The condition of our highyways', 'Canadian Welfare System' and 'The Immagration issue." Part of the data collection include...
View 'University Students Carry Out a Variety of Surveys in Toronto'
Funny story: Heather Locklear faces jail time over recent 'hit and run' incident

Heather Locklear faces jail time over recent 'hit and run' incident

Heather Locklear faces jail time over recent 'hit and run' incident. The 48 year old actress was involved in a fracas outside a New York night club yesterday evening. Heather was turned away from "Club 69" for being unsuitably dressed. "Club 69"...
View 'Heather Locklear faces jail time over recent 'hit and run' incident'
Funny story: Election Promises - A Return to a Golden Age of War

Election Promises - A Return to a Golden Age of War

Modern Warfare is simply not as good as it used to be, say politicians, and Britain may well see a return to the golden age of militarism following the May general election. The leaders of the two main parties, and David Cameron, privately agree...
View 'Election Promises - A Return to a Golden Age of War'
Funny story: Jellied spiels!

Jellied spiels!

It was announced this evening that following two boring televised debates between the UK's three main political parties, next week's debate will be replaced by a three-way jelly wrestling contest. The rules are as follows: - Each contestant is...
View 'Jellied spiels!'
Funny story: Armed carjacker from Wiggington trapped by dog turd

Armed carjacker from Wiggington trapped by dog turd

A man whose dog's crap was used to link him to an armed carjacking has been jailed for at least four minutes. Fred Bumberclart was arrested in November 2008 when police recovered excrement from the burnt-out vehicle, seized the animal - called Bod...
View 'Armed carjacker from Wiggington trapped by dog turd'
Funny story: Obama apologizes to Wall Street: Actually meant to blame Sesame Street for Nation's financial woes

Obama apologizes to Wall Street: Actually meant to blame Sesame Street for Nation's financial woes

Washington, D.C.: President Obama sheepishly apologized today for his incessant attacks on Wall Street over the first 15 months of his presidency. Claiming that he often mixes up the inanimate objects he likes to blame for our nation's troubles, Oba...
View 'Obama apologizes to Wall Street: Actually meant to blame Sesame Street for Nation's financial woes'
Funny story: Tobacco Industry Rejoicing over latest medical advice

Tobacco Industry Rejoicing over latest medical advice

Smoking is good for you! It's official - The Department of Health has just released findings from a ten-year investigation into the dangers of smoking tobacco and has concluded that all the evidence points to the fact that it makes no difference whet...
View 'Tobacco Industry Rejoicing over latest medical advice'
Funny story: End of the Rainbow elves sue Obama

End of the Rainbow elves sue Obama

The elves who reside at the end of the rainbow have filed a lawsuit against the Obama administration. The elves are claiming that his secret service broke into there houses in the middle of the night and confiscated all the gold they have saved u...
View 'End of the Rainbow elves sue Obama'
Funny story: Royal British Navy Warships Are En Route To Iceland To Blast The Hell Out of The Volcano

Royal British Navy Warships Are En Route To Iceland To Blast The Hell Out of The Volcano

PORTSMOUTH, England - A Royal British Navy warship flotilla left this English Channel port city early today en route to Iceland. The British government has expressed extreme anger, disdain, outrage, and bitterness at the ugly hellacious volcanic a...
View 'Royal British Navy Warships Are En Route To Iceland To Blast The Hell Out of The Volcano'
Funny story: Labour says hospitals are there to treat sick people

Labour says hospitals are there to treat sick people

The Labour Party have announced how they will cut funding for the NHS without reducing quality - by only treating sick people. A spokeswoman said,"we are wasting so much money on fringe activities and want to reacquaint the NHS with its core principl...
View 'Labour says hospitals are there to treat sick people'
Funny story: Sam-Cam Says She Hates Nick Clegg Because He's Got Hairy Nostrils

Sam-Cam Says She Hates Nick Clegg Because He's Got Hairy Nostrils

In a snatched interview with Samantha Cameron, the Conservative Party Leader's wife explained - as she sat on her backside creosoting a fence - that she has nothing personal against Nick Clegg, but that she is surprised that the Lib-Dem leader manage...
View 'Sam-Cam Says She Hates Nick Clegg Because He's Got Hairy Nostrils'
Funny story: Supermarket to offer Value range legal stuff

Supermarket to offer Value range legal stuff

Following the changes in the Legal Services Act allowing anyone to offer legal services, a supermarket has launched their new Value Legal services. Saying they guarantee to 'undercut any law firm in the country', they offer for example: "sue one...
View 'Supermarket to offer Value range legal stuff'
Funny story: Samantha Ronson Spits In Lindsay Lohan's Face - Lindsay Kicks Samantha in The Balls

Samantha Ronson Spits In Lindsay Lohan's Face - Lindsay Kicks Samantha in The Balls

WEST HOLLYWOOD - It certainly does appear that Lindsay Lohan just does not know what the meaning of "no" is. Her ex-boyfriend Samantha Ronson dumped her last year and since then LiLo has been openly pining for the oafish looking 'pixie boy.' It ha...
View 'Samantha Ronson Spits In Lindsay Lohan's Face - Lindsay Kicks Samantha in The Balls'
Funny story: Store Wars - Episode One - The Phantom Menace

Store Wars - Episode One - The Phantom Menace

CNN (Corb News Network) Can Reveal that supermarket chain ASDA's shares have soared this evening as a takeover bid has been placed by an unknown consortium. A Spokesperson from Asda, Mr Barry DeLeargo from their Great Bridge Branch stated. "A G...
View 'Store Wars - Episode One - The Phantom Menace'
Funny story: UK to become ''Immigration Capitol of the World'' by 2012

UK to become ''Immigration Capitol of the World'' by 2012

The Home Office has tried to hide shocking new statistics on Polish Immigration to the UK in the last year and were only forced to make the stats public when a Polish Pole Dancer, Iliaka Rimmurbottomoff had the 2inch file shoved into her knickers, wh...
View 'UK to become ''Immigration Capitol of the World'' by 2012'
Funny story: Two thousand Year Old Vending Machine Discovered

Two thousand Year Old Vending Machine Discovered

Fayoum Oasis south of Cairo - The extensive dig at Fayoum has rewarded the scientific community with an enormous amount of artifacts and new information about ancient Egypt. The dig site is dated in the 3rd century B.C., during the reign of King Pto...
View 'Two thousand Year Old Vending Machine Discovered'
Funny story: Man Might vote Marmite

Man Might vote Marmite

After the number of times the Marmite advertisement has been shown a man has come forward saying he wants to vote Marmite. Victor Meldrew who is totally pissed of with the lot of them said "We have had Blairites, and Brownites, and other Shites, a...
View 'Man Might vote Marmite'
Funny story: Kate Gosselin Jonesing for Katie Holmes' Life

Kate Gosselin Jonesing for Katie Holmes' Life

So far, Kate Gosselin's attempt at becoming a big name in Hollywood has failed miserably, but that isn't keeping her from her dream of some day having her name associated with stardom. Perhaps all those lonely, angry housewives who've been in Kate's...
View 'Kate Gosselin Jonesing for Katie Holmes' Life'
Funny story: Simon Cowell's Fiancée Mezhgan Hussainy Places A Restraining Order Against Kara "Raging Hormones" DioGuardi

Simon Cowell's Fiancée Mezhgan Hussainy Places A Restraining Order Against Kara "Raging Hormones" DioGuardi

LOS ANGELES - In a move that many in the know knew was coming, Simon Cowell's fiancée Mezhgan Hussainy has asked the county court of Los Angeles to place a restraining order on American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi. Hussainy, who is an ex-Afghani fre...
View 'Simon Cowell's Fiancée Mezhgan Hussainy Places A Restraining Order Against Kara "Raging Hormones" DioGuardi'
Funny story: 'More As We Get It' - Tagline Axed

'More As We Get It' - Tagline Axed

It has been decided by unanimous agreement that the tagline 'More as we get it' is to be axed with immediate effect from all satirical websites. The tagline, which has been used prolifically in recent years has been dubbed as politically incorrect...
View ''More As We Get It' - Tagline Axed'
Funny story: A McMahon in Every Corner!

A McMahon in Every Corner!

Tonights Triple Threat Match live from the Bristol Silverdome is going to be a slobberknocker, Three Men destined to become Prime Minister and more importantly the WWE UK Champion. But The Corb News Network can reveal today that there will be a Mcmah...
View 'A McMahon in Every Corner!'
Funny story: Florida Governor Crist Tops Latest GOP Sh*t List

Florida Governor Crist Tops Latest GOP Sh*t List

Don't let the "R" by his name fool you, Charlie Crist is not your typical Republican. The Florida Governor does not tow the Republican Party line and expects to face a considerable backlash as he runs against the Tea Party's "Boy Wonder", Marco Rubi...
View 'Florida Governor Crist Tops Latest GOP Sh*t List'
Funny story: Cambridge's congestion charge a step nearer

Cambridge's congestion charge a step nearer

Cambridge has announced plans to introduce even more traffic lights on the city's busy ring road in an attempt to force residents to accept the congestion charge. Latest plans show additional pot-holes and collapsed sewers to be investigated in 6...
View 'Cambridge's congestion charge a step nearer'
Funny story: Female paedophile wins custody of her child

Female paedophile wins custody of her child

Further demonstrating their lack of a grasp on reality, a family court ruled yesterday that nursery nurse Diana Taken should be awarded sole custody of her 6 year old son, Stephen. Ms Taken was convicted last week at the Old Bailey of sexually ab...
View 'Female paedophile wins custody of her child'
Funny story: Nick Clegg Denies Being The Grandson Of Cleggy Out Of Last Of The Summer Wine

Nick Clegg Denies Being The Grandson Of Cleggy Out Of Last Of The Summer Wine

A clearly exasperated Lib-Dem leader Nick Clegg today issued his strongest denial yet as smears against his character continue to surface. Nick Clegg vehemently denied that he is the grandson of Cleggy out of Last Of The Summer Wine, saying that C...
View 'Nick Clegg Denies Being The Grandson Of Cleggy Out Of Last Of The Summer Wine'
Funny story: 98.6 is Now 98.7 Thanks to Global Warming

98.6 is Now 98.7 Thanks to Global Warming

Global warming is the cause of lots of scientific proven anomalies that are changing the environment. Glaciers are disappearing, the ozone has a hole in it, Jay Leno is back on the tonight show, Glacier Park is being renamed Just Mountain Park, and...
View '98.6 is Now 98.7 Thanks to Global Warming'
Funny story: Gordon Brown caught shoplifting

Gordon Brown caught shoplifting

Prime Minister Gordon Brown was caught by store detectives at his local Tesco store leaving with a calculator which he hadn't paid for. When stopped by security, he immediately admitted that he hadn't paid for it and offered to pay straight away.
View 'Gordon Brown caught shoplifting'
Funny story: Mother has 16th baby taken into care

Mother has 16th baby taken into care

30-year old mother of 16, Josephine Led, from Hackney has just broken the UK record for most children taken into care following the birth of her 16th child, a boy, yesterday. Social Services officials were present at the birth to take the child a...
View 'Mother has 16th baby taken into care'
Funny story: Quintuplets to stand for election

Quintuplets to stand for election

Identical sisters and quintuplets, Susan (Labour), Sally (Lib-Dems), Stephanie (Tory), Sarah (UKIP) and Sandra Stallion (Green) have all decided to stand for the highly marginal seat of Great Floatering-on-Sea. Their parents are very proud of them al...
View 'Quintuplets to stand for election'
Funny story: Nick Clegg Is As Bent As A Nine Pound Note Claim Rivals

Nick Clegg Is As Bent As A Nine Pound Note Claim Rivals

Hot on the heels of his meteoric rise in popularity, Lib-Dem leader Nick Clegg is quickly having to adjust to the seedy underbelly of political life as he becomes the target of an unprecedented smear campaign. Allegations of financial irregulariti...
View 'Nick Clegg Is As Bent As A Nine Pound Note Claim Rivals'
Funny story: Kristen Stewart and Rob Pattinson Engaged for: 'Dances With Werewolves'

Kristen Stewart and Rob Pattinson Engaged for: 'Dances With Werewolves'

Taking full advantage of their type casting Hollywood's favorite couple has signed up to do the remake of Kevin Costner's best film. 'Dances With Werewolves' has Rob playing Lieutenant John Goodbar who is turned by a vampire on a civil war battle...
View 'Kristen Stewart and Rob Pattinson Engaged for: 'Dances With Werewolves''
Funny story: Nick Griffin Strips Naked, Covers Himself With Marmite And Declares "I'm Full Of Goodness!"

Nick Griffin Strips Naked, Covers Himself With Marmite And Declares "I'm Full Of Goodness!"

BNP leader Nick Griffin was embroiled in a row with Marmite earlier today following his behaviour at a party meeting. Griffin attended the meeting at Stoke-on-Trent wearing only a thin layer of Marmite. He urged party members to "try a lick and see i...
View 'Nick Griffin Strips Naked, Covers Himself With Marmite And Declares "I'm Full Of Goodness!"'
Funny story: Stop Volcanic Activity

Stop Volcanic Activity

"These volcanic eruptions have got to stop," was the basis of a memo that recently came out of the Oval Office. It was a source of bewilderment to the Office Secretarial Pool, who had no idea which way to direct the Presidential Memo. One commente...
View 'Stop Volcanic Activity'
Funny story: Wigan winger Charles N'Zogbia in spelling test arrest

Wigan winger Charles N'Zogbia in spelling test arrest

Wigan Athletic footballer Charles N'Zogbia has been arrested over allegations that someone else completed the written part of his spelling test. He was held on suspicion of causing fraud by false representation as he turned up at Sale Spelling Tes...
View 'Wigan winger Charles N'Zogbia in spelling test arrest'
Funny story: Clegg in being a Nazi shock!

Clegg in being a Nazi shock!

It was today revealed by the Daily Smellygraph that PM hopeful Nick Clegg is a raving Nazi. 'Ten years ago, writes Walter Torysmith, 'Clegg wrote an article in which he suggested that, a mere 70 years after the war individual Germans, including child...
View 'Clegg in being a Nazi shock!'
Funny story: Obama Stumps for California Democrat Rocky Balboa

Obama Stumps for California Democrat Rocky Balboa

In an obvious political panic attack President Obama flew to Hollywood to act as the cut man for Senator Boxer. Boxer has been a long time supporter of Obama's every whim but is destined to be knocked out in the mid term elections. Obama arri...
View 'Obama Stumps for California Democrat Rocky Balboa'
Funny story: Over 40 Crowd Swoons for Michael Buble'

Over 40 Crowd Swoons for Michael Buble'

Mature female audiences the world over have found a new crooning heartthrob to adore, whose name alone paints the romantic picture of a chilled glass of Champagne. Still hot from his recent win at the Canadian JUNO Awards, Michael Buble' has been se...
View 'Over 40 Crowd Swoons for Michael Buble''
Funny story: Penis McFlypaper In Controversial Fifth Round Bangkok KO

Penis McFlypaper In Controversial Fifth Round Bangkok KO

World Cruiserweight Champion Penis McFlypaper retained his crown last night here in Bangkok in controversial circumstances after KO-ing Welsh challenger Blethyn 'Brickhead' O'Jones in Round 5. It looked good for Penis McFlypaper as he made a spect...
View 'Penis McFlypaper In Controversial Fifth Round Bangkok KO'
Funny story: Fulham To Play Hamburg In Car Park-Jumpers For Goalposts

Fulham To Play Hamburg In Car Park-Jumpers For Goalposts

The Europa League semi final first leg between Hamburg and Fulham is to take place in a car park at the back of Jurgen's Beer and Sauerkraut Emporium, Hamburg. Originally the match was scheduled to take place in Hamburg's modern stadium. However, Ful...
View 'Fulham To Play Hamburg In Car Park-Jumpers For Goalposts'
Funny story: "God is Definitely Gay" Says Gay Dutch Sexpert

"God is Definitely Gay" Says Gay Dutch Sexpert

At the risk of raising the ire of religious straight people worldwide, Barend Hardwinkel, Gay Sexpert from Amsterdam, Netherlands has written in his new book, Move Over, Mary, that, "Yes, God is definitely gay." In an interview punctuated with co...
View '"God is Definitely Gay" Says Gay Dutch Sexpert'
Funny story: Nick Cleggover's famous 'no more than 30 lovers' start emerging from the woodwork!

Nick Cleggover's famous 'no more than 30 lovers' start emerging from the woodwork!

London - (Rotters): They're hardly in the Jamie Jungers or Loredana Joile Tiger masterclass of notches on the bedpost. But some of the thirty Nick Clegg shags that Glib Dem leader boasted about in his 2008 GQ interview have agreed to be quizzed...
View 'Nick Cleggover's famous 'no more than 30 lovers' start emerging from the woodwork!'
Funny story: American Rugrats Nick "Idols" Mentor Victoria Beckham's Jewelry

American Rugrats Nick "Idols" Mentor Victoria Beckham's Jewelry

LOS ANGELES, California - Ex-Spice Girl Victoria Beckham has no problem stealing the spotlight, but she has a serious problem with the little rugrats who stole jewelry from her dressing room after they appeared with her on America's Got Idols Wednesd...
View 'American Rugrats Nick "Idols" Mentor Victoria Beckham's Jewelry'
Funny story: Ass Hole Bilboa To Fight Anal (Whizz Bang) Roberts In Vegas

Ass Hole Bilboa To Fight Anal (Whizz Bang) Roberts In Vegas

Middleweight Championship contender Ass Hole Bilboa will be fighting reigning champ Anal (Whizz Bang) Roberts in Vegas in September according to promoter Don Kiddick. It's a fight that many fight fans thought they'd never see as Anal (Whizz Bang)...
View 'Ass Hole Bilboa To Fight Anal (Whizz Bang) Roberts In Vegas'
Funny story: Alternative view: How to get a Democracy

Alternative view: How to get a Democracy

Totally peed off with the brainwashing, three party, brain washing, crap system, that they keep shoving down our throats? Then its time to speak up. If any of these unscrupulous bastards comes to your door during the election tell them where to go and tell your family and friends do not vote for any of the three horsemen of the Apocalypse. They all are responsible for fiddling their expense...
View 'Alternative view: How to get a Democracy'
Funny story: Larry King Divorce Heads for Extra Innings as Little League Coach Talks About Scoring on Squeeze Play with Wife!

Larry King Divorce Heads for Extra Innings as Little League Coach Talks About Scoring on Squeeze Play with Wife!

Just as the King Divorce frenzy appeared to be settled in the late innings, a pinch hitter has stepped up to blow the game wide open with revelations of a 'torrid' affair with the 76 year old septuagenarian's wife. King's 7th or 8th wife, (who'...
View 'Larry King Divorce Heads for Extra Innings as Little League Coach Talks About Scoring on Squeeze Play with Wife!'
Funny story: Robert Pattinson on Mars

Robert Pattinson on Mars

Robert Pattinson has been short listed to appear in the remake of that cult classic Movie, Robinson Crusoe on Mars, which was made in 1964 starring Adam West, who is famous for playing Batman, in the television series in the 1960s. "It will be a c...
View 'Robert Pattinson on Mars'
Funny story: Years Later: The Good The Bad & The Ugly

Years Later: The Good The Bad & The Ugly

Some people have things that pray on their minds for years, eating away at them until eventually they do something because of what happened many years before. A pensioner called John Bibby, stole a packet of Jaffa Cakes 50 years ago when he worke...
View 'Years Later: The Good The Bad & The Ugly'
Funny story: Things to Ponder over

Things to Ponder over

1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out"? 2. Who was the first one who thought that the white thing that came from a hen's butt looked edible? 3. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat? 4. If Jimmy cracks corn and no on...
View 'Things to Ponder over'
Funny story: Glib Dems airbrush away benefits cheat Mayor

Glib Dems airbrush away benefits cheat Mayor

London - (Glib Gab Pact): "Someone should quiz Nick Clegg about dodgy Liberal Democrat Mayor of Camden, Omar Faruque Ansari," pollsters said today ahead of the second (c)leg of the party leaders' televised debate. Ansar, 69, was arrested by police...
View 'Glib Dems airbrush away benefits cheat Mayor'
Funny story: Demi Lovato damages tween hearing

Demi Lovato damages tween hearing

Los Angeles: Demi Lovato (yes, that girl who dresses as bee in Sonny with a Chance) was found pleading for mercy in the court after she got sued for ruining the hearing power of several young tweens around the world. Her 'songs', as she calls the...
View 'Demi Lovato damages tween hearing'
Funny story: Santa Claus puts Gordon Brown & The Labour Cult on his naughty list

Santa Claus puts Gordon Brown & The Labour Cult on his naughty list

We are not used to hearing from Santa Claus, at this time of year but Santa, is so annoyed with the amount of General Election, rubbish taking up the TV, that he has come out with a sensational announcement. Speaking at a press conference, in Icel...
View 'Santa Claus puts Gordon Brown & The Labour Cult on his naughty list'
Funny story: Ape research points way to origin of religion

Ape research points way to origin of religion

Controversial research published in New Scientist, demonstrating that apes suffer self-doubt, has given scientists an important clue into how religion may have originated in our early hominid ancestors. In the research, apes first watched a human...
View 'Ape research points way to origin of religion'
Funny story: Is it the end of Bliar and Browns' thousand year Socialist Reich?

Is it the end of Bliar and Browns' thousand year Socialist Reich?

Socialist Reichs Bunker, LONDON: Surrounded by Gordon Browns inner conclave of sychophants, the stone faced Socialist Reichs Prime Minister, listens to a top economist explaining what needs to be done to prevent the United Kingdom losing its triple...
View 'Is it the end of Bliar and Browns' thousand year Socialist Reich?'
Funny story: Schwarzenegger makes Great Movie's but is Lousy Governor

Schwarzenegger makes Great Movie's but is Lousy Governor

Arnold Schwarzenegger makes great Movies but when it comes to being Governor of California he is being slated as just about the worst Governor there is. This claim has Americans deeply divided between those who claim Schwarzenegger, cannot even s...
View 'Schwarzenegger makes Great Movie's but is Lousy Governor'
Funny story: Robert Downey Jr as Wizard of Oz we can do better than that

Robert Downey Jr as Wizard of Oz we can do better than that

Robert Downey Jnr is being lined up to play the Wizard of Oz in a new Movie and is in talks with Sam Mendes. The Wizard as we found out in the original Movie of the Wizard Of Oz is just an old man hiding behind a curtain deceiving everybody to his tr...
View 'Robert Downey Jr as Wizard of Oz we can do better than that'
Funny story: New James Bond Movie may be a case of Deja View

New James Bond Movie may be a case of Deja View

As a result of the huge debt owed by the studios the new James Bond Movie may not be hitting a screen near you. A plan is afoot so as not to disappoint all the Bond fans out there. In order to keep movie theatres full, producers of the Bond Movie...
View 'New James Bond Movie may be a case of Deja View'
Funny story: Nick Clegg under the bar ahead of second election debate

Nick Clegg under the bar ahead of second election debate

Lib Dem leader Nick Clegg has been put under heavy sedation ahead of the second prime ministerial TV debate. His colleague Wesley Buxomley-Smythe said Tory-supporting papers were trying to get Mr Clegg drunk, after last week's debate led to a Lib...
View 'Nick Clegg under the bar ahead of second election debate'
Funny story: Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart conned in Volcanic Dust storm

Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart conned in Volcanic Dust storm

Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart have been involved in the case of a conman Freddy the Fraudster, from Fakenham. Pattinson likes buying unusual presents so he bought Kristen, a jar of Volcanic Ash from Iceland, which he bought from Freddy. E...
View 'Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart conned in Volcanic Dust storm'
Funny story: Pfizzier unveil new wonder drug

Pfizzier unveil new wonder drug

Multinational drug giant Pfizzier have been searching for the next big drug, and believe that they have found it. The new drug, with the chemical name Codafil-dioxymethyl, is due to go on sale after extensive trials have proven it safe and effect...
View 'Pfizzier unveil new wonder drug'
Funny story: TV Channel admits discriminating in programme choice

TV Channel admits discriminating in programme choice

Following the last second cancellation of a TV programme about separated dads, a spokeswoman for the channel was forced to admit that, they have a panel of members of the public whom they ask what should be shown on TV and which songs should be on ra...
View 'TV Channel admits discriminating in programme choice'
Funny story: Apple Social Applelet out now on iPhone

Apple Social Applelet out now on iPhone

The latest Applelet to come out of the Apple Labs has set the Social Networking world alight with the possibilities. Called simply iD it is a clever piece of technology combined with Apple's traditional ease of use. Currently, the iD app is only a...
View 'Apple Social Applelet out now on iPhone'
Funny story: Manchester United is world's stupidest club says High-IQ Society

Manchester United is world's stupidest club says High-IQ Society

Manchester United is still the most stupid football club in the world, according to the world's leading high IQ society. The Premier League title holders, who came second in a list compiled by the Education Secretary in February, again topped the...
View 'Manchester United is world's stupidest club says High-IQ Society'
Funny story: 10-year old sues government for IVF refusal

10-year old sues government for IVF refusal

10-year old Luce Knickers has today announced that she is suing the Government over their refusal to allow her IVF treatment. Ms Knickers said,"it is terribly unfair and discriminatory. All my friends have babies and council houses and I have bee...
View '10-year old sues government for IVF refusal'
Funny story: Maggie to stand in election

Maggie to stand in election

The safe Conservative seat of West Fotherington today announced that their candidate for the forthcoming election will be Maggie, a 3-year old ginger tom cat. Marmaduke Toryalltheway, Chairman of the West Fotherington Conservative party said,"Dav...
View 'Maggie to stand in election'
Funny story: Katie Price Diagnosed EDD Positive - Alex Reid Devastated

Katie Price Diagnosed EDD Positive - Alex Reid Devastated

Katie Price is being comforted by friends this morning after confirmation from a Harley Street doctor that she is actually EDD Positive. The ex-Page Three girl is said by sources to be 'emotionally fragile' after tests confirmed the presence of th...
View 'Katie Price Diagnosed EDD Positive - Alex Reid Devastated'
Funny story: Airline Cargo Goes by Container Ship

Airline Cargo Goes by Container Ship

Rather than wait for the ash to clear, one British airline has shipped its entire airplanes, loaded with cargo, on container ships. During the Icelandic ash trauma several cargo airplanes were stranded in Amsterdam destined for the Middle East.
View 'Airline Cargo Goes by Container Ship'
Funny story: Tim Urban Is The Latest American Idol Victim

Tim Urban Is The Latest American Idol Victim

HOLLYWOOD - In an American Idol results show night that saw performances by The Black Eyed Peas, Alicia Keys, Queen Latifah, Tatiana Del Toro, George Lopez, Carrie Underwood, Mary J. Blige, Wanda Sykes, Elton John, and Kelly Ripa, the producers final...
View 'Tim Urban Is The Latest American Idol Victim'
Funny story: Jesse James Says That He Has No Idea Where The Rumor of Him Being in The KKK Came From

Jesse James Says That He Has No Idea Where The Rumor of Him Being in The KKK Came From

LONG BEACH, California - Jesse James, owner of West Coast Choppers, and one of the biggest, dumbest jerks in the Lower 48 has angrily stated that he has no idea where the hell the rumors about him being a card-carrying member of the Ku Klux Klan came...
View 'Jesse James Says That He Has No Idea Where The Rumor of Him Being in The KKK Came From'
Funny story: Susan Boyle Working on Her Autobiography Called, "Me Voice It Comes From Me Bloomin' Boobies It Does"

Susan Boyle Working on Her Autobiography Called, "Me Voice It Comes From Me Bloomin' Boobies It Does"

BLACKBURN, Scotland - The Scottish lass or lassie depending on which part of Ireland you're from has stated that she is currently working on her autobiography entitled Me Voice It Comes From Me Bloomin' Boobies. SuBo, as most people from Wales, Gr...
View 'Susan Boyle Working on Her Autobiography Called, "Me Voice It Comes From Me Bloomin' Boobies It Does"'
Funny story: Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, Sandra Bullock, Cheryl Cole, and Kerry Katona To Star in "Titanic 3 - What Blimey Iceberg?"

Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, Sandra Bullock, Cheryl Cole, and Kerry Katona To Star in "Titanic 3 - What Blimey Iceberg?"

LONDON - Noted Italian producer Bellanino Terrabini has announced that he will begin filming on his latest ocean going epic, Titanic 3 - What Blimey Iceberg? in late May. Terrabini says that he is really looking forward to working with one of the...
View 'Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, Sandra Bullock, Cheryl Cole, and Kerry Katona To Star in "Titanic 3 - What Blimey Iceberg?"'
Funny story: Robert Pattinson Proposes To Kristen Stewart Again

Robert Pattinson Proposes To Kristen Stewart Again

A Hollywood insider has informed us that Twilight star Robert Pattinson popped the question to co-star Kristen Stewart just last night - the 17th time he's proposed this week. It appears that K-Stew, currently rumored to be suffering from a severe...
View 'Robert Pattinson Proposes To Kristen Stewart Again'
Funny story: Lady Gaga In Hairy Legs Mystery

Lady Gaga In Hairy Legs Mystery

Nobody is really sure how it started but rumours abounded in the entertainment world last night that singer/fashion icon Lady Gaga has got really hairy legs. Some commentators maintain that the hairy legs jibes first saw the light of day on a sati...
View 'Lady Gaga In Hairy Legs Mystery'
Funny story: Spock Retiring His Leonard Nimoy Ears: pointless ears a turn-off for gay partner Sulu

Spock Retiring His Leonard Nimoy Ears: pointless ears a turn-off for gay partner Sulu

Don't expect to see Spock in the 52nd Star Trek film sequel now in the works for 2012. The 79-year-old bisexual half-Vulcan tells the Toronto Sun he's retiring from all acting gigs, including appearances as Leonard Nimoy, "I've been doing this pr...
View 'Spock Retiring His Leonard Nimoy Ears: pointless ears a turn-off for gay partner Sulu'
Funny story: Queen's Birthday Party Marred By Massive Food Fight

Queen's Birthday Party Marred By Massive Food Fight

The Queen's Birthday Party descended into chaos yesterday and had to be prematurely broken up as a massive food fight broke out between the guests and their hosts. A source told me that the party, attended by heads of state, and various celebritie...
View 'Queen's Birthday Party Marred By Massive Food Fight'
Funny story: Ricky Martin poops donuts

Ricky Martin poops donuts

Puerto Rican singer Ricky Martin said in an interview with me that since he came out of the closet late last month that he has been really busy. "Everybody just want to have sex with me!" According to Mr. Martin's manager,...
View 'Ricky Martin poops donuts'
Funny story: Ronnie Barker is 'Open all hours' in order to attract customers now boycotting Iceland

Ronnie Barker is 'Open all hours' in order to attract customers now boycotting Iceland

Ronnie Barker is 'Open All Hours' as per usual, but is now REALLY 'Open All Hours' 24/7. "Me an' Granville - me little Hungarian nephew - are g-g-g-oing to be o-o-pen twenty four s-s-s-s-. Oh bugger it. We'll be open all d-d-d-ay and night. "I...
View 'Ronnie Barker is 'Open all hours' in order to attract customers now boycotting Iceland'
Funny story: Girls Aloud's Nadine Coyle's Twitter Account Hacked

Girls Aloud's Nadine Coyle's Twitter Account Hacked

Fans of Nadine Coyle, the Girls Aloud singer, were left confused and upset this week when a hacker posted on her Twitter account that the singer had lost 44lbs in weight by using a new dieting regime. The hacker, writing as Nadine, said that she w...
View 'Girls Aloud's Nadine Coyle's Twitter Account Hacked'
« Mar 2010 April 2010 May 2010 »
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun
 
1st
63
2nd
46
3rd
44
4th
44
5th
64
6th
59
7th
56
8th
57
9th
53
10th
49
11th
53
12th
47
13th
65
14th
58
15th
71
16th
70
17th
57
18th
57
19th
62
20th
73
21st
89
22nd
88
23rd
68
24th
50
25th
56
26th
53
27th
47
28th
54
29th
55
30th
55
 

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 multiplied by 2?

6 1 8 24


55 readers are online right now!

Go to top