Funny story: I Promise My Toothpaste Won't Explode

I Promise My Toothpaste Won't Explode

Recently I was on a flight from LA to Chicago. Without thinking, I brought my large tube of toothpaste. It made it through checkout at LAX with no trouble. I brought it to Chicago, happily brushed my teeth with it several times over the course of four days and all was right with the world. However, on the way back, a sharp-eyed security man at O'Hare saw the monstrous tube. "Sir, we must take t...
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Funny story: Hitler says Tony evicted him for no reason

Hitler says Tony evicted him for no reason

A Centugenarian, known to his friends down the OAP centre, as Dolfie, has been evicted by Tony Blair. The very old German said Tony and his wife Cherie had just kicked him out on the street for no reason. Tony denies this. He said he had very good...
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Funny story: Darling recommends a pay freeze for Labour MPs

Darling recommends a pay freeze for Labour MPs

Chancellor Alastair Darling has recommended that all 356 Labour MPs should have their pay - plus expenses and perks - freezed for 2010-11, to pay for doctors, dentists, scientists, teachers, and other valuable public employees. This breaks the con...
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Funny story: Teen Buzz Threat To Global Stability

Teen Buzz Threat To Global Stability

The new "Teen (Mosquito) Buzz" which was originally created to prevent teenage crime is been used by school kids to drive their teachers nuts! All US, Japanese, European and worldwide adolescents have found the once annoying sound can be used as a...
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Funny story: Three Letterman Staff Members File A $100 Million Class-Action Lawsuit

Three Letterman Staff Members File A $100 Million Class-Action Lawsuit

MANHATTAN - Three of the Late Show with David Letterman staff members have filed a $100 million class-action lawsuit against the gap-toothed host who seems to be getting less and less funny with each passing show. Attorney Mildred Rothstein has be...
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Funny story: Sitting On De Fence Of The Realm: An Official Hystery Of M15

Sitting On De Fence Of The Realm: An Official Hystery Of M15

London - (Smoke 'N' Mirrors): A new book published this week has archived some spectacular clangers by UK security service MI5. Sitting On De Fence of The Realm by Rear Admiral (Rtd) Sir Gusset Baloochie chronicles fifty years of KGB catastrophe a...
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Funny story: Detroit Lions' Only Fan Calls It Quits After Sunday's Crushing Defeat

Detroit Lions' Only Fan Calls It Quits After Sunday's Crushing Defeat

DETROIT, MICHIGAN - When the Detroit Lions had their first win in nearly two years - a 19-14 defeat of the Washington Redskins on September 27 - Harry Havisham was there to rejoice in the moment. In fact, he was the only fan in Ford Field that day,...
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Funny story: Huge "Woody" wows the US in Zombieland film but Janet Jackson refused to suck up to it

Huge "Woody" wows the US in Zombieland film but Janet Jackson refused to suck up to it

The latest blockbuster movie to wow the Yanks is Zombieland starring Woody Harrelson, better known as that Zombie barkeeper, thanks Frazier, Cheers. Only problem haunting the movie was the refusal of Janet Jackson to star alongside the massive "Wo...
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Funny story: African Cannibal Tribal Chief Wants To Buy Roman Polanski

African Cannibal Tribal Chief Wants To Buy Roman Polanski

CHITUNGWIZA, Zimbabwe - One of the most popular cannibal tribal chiefs in Africa, Chief Boomboosha has emailed the Swiss authorities offering to buy Roman Polanski for $20. The Zimbabwean cannibal chief said that he wants to serve RoPo to his trib...
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Funny story: Glastonbury Festival 2010 sells out in 5 minutes, only problem is nobody knows the crap line-up

Glastonbury Festival 2010 sells out in 5 minutes, only problem is nobody knows the crap line-up

The annual Glastonbury "Bash" is sold out for 2010 without the organisers divulging their main acts. The once so famous rock festival (Led Zeppelin performed there once!) now turned into a mega-festival of, well, much to do about nothing really, a...
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Funny story: Chanel #69, Now $3,000 An Ounce, Develops #2P

Chanel #69, Now $3,000 An Ounce, Develops #2P

The world-renowned fashion house and famous perfumer Chanel, after producing the 2008 masterpiece $3,000-an-ounce, new #69, has now developed a very special #2P for canines only. "We have taken some of the main ingredients of the odor of 92 diff...
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Funny story: Indian Airline Claims Sex Flight A Success

Indian Airline Claims Sex Flight A Success

Executives at an Indian airline have hailed as a tremendous success, a new service which caters for the depraved and sex-mad amongst travellers, providing in-flight gratuitous sex facilities. Kabbadi Air started its service with a flight from the...
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Funny story: Grandma Lee Joins The Cast Of Saturday Night Live

Grandma Lee Joins The Cast Of Saturday Night Live

NEW YORK CITY - A spokesperson for Saturday Night Live has stated that Grandma Lee who finished third in this year's America's Got Talent reality show has agreed to join the cast of regulars on the popular NBC show. The Gramster, as her granddaugh...
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Funny story: Whoopi Goldbeg Confesses: Sex with Polanski and Letterman was a 'Joke-Joke'!

Whoopi Goldbeg Confesses: Sex with Polanski and Letterman was a 'Joke-Joke'!

Hollywood,CA/ Left Coast Entertainment Commentary - Comedian Whoopi Goldberg shocked her live TV audience on the daytime talk show, The View, with an admission of having sex with both Roman Polanski and David Letterman. Goldberg further confounde...
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Funny story: Roman Polanski Rape Comedy Set For Xmas Release

Roman Polanski Rape Comedy Set For Xmas Release

Good news for devotees of noted locked-up film director Roman Polanski as his latest movie is set for a December release. It's a comedy based around a rape, and is somewhat autobiographical in concept. Polanski remains in protective police custody...
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Funny story: Another Letterman Shocker!

Another Letterman Shocker!

No sooner has David Letterman revealed that he has been sleeping with the ladies on his late night TV show, today it was announced in the National Inquirer -in an exclusive! -that the lady he has always called "Mom" who usually comes around on his Th...
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Funny story: Senate Democrats to sell votes on Craigslist

Senate Democrats to sell votes on Craigslist

Senate Democrats on The Senate Finance Committee revealed today that they are putting their votes up for sale on Craigslist. The announcement came amid speculation that the work on the Health Care bill was finally winding down. Senator Max Baucus...
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Funny story: Bonkettes Blow Rio Away

Bonkettes Blow Rio Away

The sexiest girl band on the planet, the Bonkettes today blew Rio De Janiero away with a stunning performance, made all the more remarkable by the fact that at one point, things threatened to take an ugly turn, before the girls at last emerged triump...
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Funny story: The Royal Christmas Message to be Internet Only

The Royal Christmas Message to be Internet Only

The Queen's Christmas Message will be shown exclusively live only to subscribers on the internet who will pay at least £4.99. All previously broadcast Royal Christmas Messages have been available on TV. Regal Media - an international agency appoin...
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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan Collapsed On Street, Rushed To Hospital

Lindsay Lohan Collapsed On Street, Rushed To Hospital

Lindsay Lohan was rushed to the hospital yesterday after she collapsed on the street. An ambulance was summoned and she was rushed to Graves General Hospital & Clinic. This morning there has already been an announcement that Ms. Lohan is doing...
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Funny story: Alabama judge accused of sex with invertebrates

Alabama judge accused of sex with invertebrates

Mobile, Alabama - (Cell Phone Scam): Judge Herman Thomas has been indicted on multiple c[o]unts of shagging a spineless fifth column of perpetrators. A former Democratic Party hot pick to be the first black feral judge in south Alabama, Thomas is...
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Funny story: Opening A Door Should Give You Right Of Way

Opening A Door Should Give You Right Of Way

Opening a door towards you puts you at a disadvantage if you have some pushy person from the other side coming towards you who doesn't wait his/her turn. Most people when going through a doorway won't think much of this unless it happens to them b...
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Funny story: Secret Government document: Hidden nuclear weapons in London!

Secret Government document: Hidden nuclear weapons in London!

A top secret Government memo detailing the locations of London's secret nuclear weapons arsenal has been found on a school bus in Southwark. The weapons are apparently live and ready to launch within two minutes from just one phone call from the P...
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Funny story: Letterman blackmailed -- again!

Letterman blackmailed -- again!

Unnamed sources in New York City law enforcement have leaked information that Talk Show comedian David Letterman has found himself as the mark in yet another extortion scheme. This time, however, easy money isn't the goal, but something more inti...
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Funny story: Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders In Alleged Bank Robbery

Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders In Alleged Bank Robbery

Police in Denver, Colorado have issued arrest warrants for six cheerleaders after a daring raid on a city bank this morning, in which 16 customers were assaulted, and three more had their faces sat on. The incident came only hours after the Dallas...
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Funny story: Todd Palin Quits His Oil Job - Plans To Run For Governor of Alaska

Todd Palin Quits His Oil Job - Plans To Run For Governor of Alaska

WASILLA, Alaska - The former 'first dude' of the frozen state of Alaska Todd Palin has just announced that he is resigning his job as oil truck driver for the Dark Black Oil Company of Anchorage. Palin, who was making $14.21 an hour also helped ou...
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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan Depressed - Says The Media Is Ignoring Her

Lindsay Lohan Depressed - Says The Media Is Ignoring Her

BEVERLY HILLS - Lindsay Lohan called up Ryan Seacrest and told him that ever since her affair with Samantha Ronson ended no one seems to care about her. She said that she has fallen into a state of depression and all she wants to do is watch MASH...
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Funny story: Dallas Cowboys Lose: Jessica Simpson Says, "Ya See It Wasn't Me After all Was It?"

Dallas Cowboys Lose: Jessica Simpson Says, "Ya See It Wasn't Me After all Was It?"

DENVER - The Denver Broncos improved their record to 4-0 with a 17-10 win over the Dallas Cowboys who fell to 2-2. The Cowboys cannot blame the mile high altitude, or the snow, or the fact that the Denver fans just happen to cheer louder than most...
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Funny story: Michael Jackson Zombie Plot Foiled?

Michael Jackson Zombie Plot Foiled?

Recently a team of scientists came to the conclusion that while the earth might survive a vampire attack, it could not survive a zombie attack. Not understanding the reasoning behind such a study, most have concluded that these men and women have...
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Funny story: Sea Monster Visions Linked to Distilleries

Sea Monster Visions Linked to Distilleries

Drumnadrochit - Worldwide reports of sea monsters, Bigfoot and other mysterious creatures have been linked with the location of breweries or distilleries nearby causing some to think that a relationship may exist. Investigative reporter Fergus McFadd...
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Funny story: Supreme Court Judge Sotomayor To Be Given Special Attention

Supreme Court Judge Sotomayor To Be Given Special Attention

Washington DC-- When Judge Sotomayor dons the robe of the Supreme Court today, she will be making history. The new judge is the first non-human ever to sit on the US Supreme Court. She will be treated very specially and shown every consideration on...
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Funny story: Letterman Weighs in on Charges of Sexual Impropriety

Letterman Weighs in on Charges of Sexual Impropriety

INDIANAPOLIS, INDIANA - David Letterman chose the Arby's on SW 41st Avenue in the city of his birth to reflect to a hastily-gathered, exclusive group of reporters about the charges of sexual impropriety that have recently plagued him. Smells of th...
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Funny story: John Edwards Exclusive Blockbuster Of A Story!

John Edwards Exclusive Blockbuster Of A Story!

In it's 39th bombshell about John Edwards, the National Inquirer now has it's 54th exclusive, this time it's the mother-in-law of John Edwards former campaign aide's cousin's friend Luigi as he reveals that the family knew all along that her son-in-l...
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