There were 1,301 spoof news stories published in February 2009. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.

Funny story: People Googling "Miley Cyrus nude" in vain

People Googling "Miley Cyrus nude" in vain

According to Google, Inc., despite the ongoing world financial crisis, rising unemployment, the housing market crash, and other more personal troubles, people throughout the world are googling for nude pictures of pop sensation and Hannah Montana sta...
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Funny story: Jade Goody Sexy Page 3 Picture Exclusive

Jade Goody Sexy Page 3 Picture Exclusive

Jade Goody, the former Big Brother contestant who was married to criminal Jack Tweed this week, is in the news again, after it was announced the News of the World have bought exclusive rights to publish her raunchy portfolio of sexy topless photograp...
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Funny story: Taylor Swift The Next Dolly Parton Without the Big Tits

Taylor Swift The Next Dolly Parton Without the Big Tits

Taylor Swift has broken all of the music industry records and she is only nineteen but she has relatively small breasts. Country music critics are comparing her meteoric rise to stardom to the great and big busted country music superstar Dolly Pa...
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Funny story: U Tube Clip Shows a Nude Obama Horsing Around in Shower After Pick Up Ball Game; Times Gets Exclusive Rights!

U Tube Clip Shows a Nude Obama Horsing Around in Shower After Pick Up Ball Game; Times Gets Exclusive Rights!

NY/NY Wall Street Journal - The New York Times, once the proud leader of journalistic excellence, has fallen on hard times, and has now resorted to sensationalism in order to boost sagging sales and its shares on the DOW by catering to Obamamania.
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Funny story: Man with World's Largest Scrotum Fined for Overweight Bags At Heathrow!

Man with World's Largest Scrotum Fined for Overweight Bags At Heathrow!

London, UK / Air Travel News - A disgruntled passenger caused a long flight delay today at Heathrow International Airport when he strongly contested being surcharged for having an overweight scrotum, which airport security classified as "carry on ba...
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Funny story: Miley Cyrus Says She's Not "Too Close" To Dad

Miley Cyrus Says She's Not "Too Close" To Dad

Miley Cyrus doesn't like to admit it, but she's bothered by people who think that she and her dad, singer Billy Ray Cyrus, are "too close or too cuddly." "That's just stupid", stated Cyrus. "Those magazines have to come up with something to print...
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Funny story: American Idol's Tatiana Del Toro Balls

American Idol's Tatiana Del Toro Balls

LOS ANGELES, California - Tatiana Del Toro, who many consider to be the most annoying contestant to ever appear in the eight-year history of American Idol has been eliminated. The 23-year-old drama queen from Puerto Rico has fallen by the wayside.
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Funny story: Aishwarya Rai filing for divorce, blames dodgy astologers' pregnancy rumors

Aishwarya Rai filing for divorce, blames dodgy astologers' pregnancy rumors

Mumbai - (Bollyawful Mess): Bollywood megastar Aishwarya Rai has told divorce lawyers that her marriage has been blighted by Bachchan in-laws' astrologers' pregnancy rumor mill. The stunning green-eyed movie queen has claimed husband Abhishek Bac...
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Funny story: Sparkling Water Has More Calories than Diet Cola

Sparkling Water Has More Calories than Diet Cola

A laboratory in Switzerland has made a discovery that will upset many a dieter who may have opted for a sparkling mineral water as opposed to a diet cola or other low calorie soft drink. For it turns out that fizzy water actually contains more calor...
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Funny story: Darwin's Theory of Evolution Has Changed Beyond All Recognition, Scientists Say

Darwin's Theory of Evolution Has Changed Beyond All Recognition, Scientists Say

Researchers at the University of Lyef near Amsterdam were astounded today when, during their celebrations to mark Charles Darwin's 200th Birthday, they realised his Theory of Evolution is no longer similar to the original. Scientists were observing...
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Funny story: New add-on for Google Earth announced - Indoors:Live

New add-on for Google Earth announced - Indoors:Live

Google announced today the release of their controversial new add-on to Google Earth, Google Indoors:Live. The new software interfaces with Windows, Mac and Linux operating systems to provide users with access to built-in and USB-connected webcams a...
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Funny story: Emma Watson in New Picture Shoot Admits She Might Do Nudity

Emma Watson in New Picture Shoot Admits She Might Do Nudity

Harry Potter actress Emma Watson, who turned eighteen last year, recently sat for a much celebrated photo shoot. "It was my first chance to be taken seriously as a model and to do a bunch of different kinds of pictures. I kind of consider this as m...
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Funny story: Robert Pattinson: Love Trapezoid

Robert Pattinson: Love Trapezoid

It has been less than three months since the movie "Twilight" has hit theaters, and its main man, Robert Pattinson, is already swooning teenage girls all over the globe. So, it comes as no surprise that the new heartthrob is being linked to the likes...
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Funny story: Japanese Woman Mistakenly Pregnant With Fertilized Monkey Egg

Japanese Woman Mistakenly Pregnant With Fertilized Monkey Egg

A Japanese woman was likely impregnated with the fertilized egg of an orangutan by accident during an in vitro procedure last year, hospital officials said Thursday. The woman, who is in her 20s, aborted the pregnancy when she was told of the pote...
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Funny story: Teen queen, Brenda Song and Rob Pattinson spotted kissing!

Teen queen, Brenda Song and Rob Pattinson spotted kissing!

Teen queen, Brenda Song and teen heartthrob Rob Pattinson have been spotted at Central Park in Manhattan. The two teen sensations were earlier spotted at Barney's and Saks Fifth Avenue, were Brenda reportedly bought a purse costing over $100,000 at...
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Funny story: Dubai Going Broke! Proves There is Only One God, and It Ain't Allah!

Dubai Going Broke! Proves There is Only One God, and It Ain't Allah!

Dubai/UAE Raggedy Ass Arab News - Despite claims to the contrary, Allah is not smiling on his children in Dubai. In addition to the recent revelation that the former playground of the rich and famous had turned into a running sewer with infidel s...
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Funny story: Hats Are The Next Big Thing Says Hat Manufacturer

Hats Are The Next Big Thing Says Hat Manufacturer

In these recession hit, snowbound, icebound, eggbound days, at last a hint of an economic revival. Milliner (hatmaker - origin from Milanese fancy goods supplier) Charlie Titfer of East London announced that his business was positively booming as...
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Funny story: Man With Little Penis Braves Taking Shower After Ballgame.

Man With Little Penis Braves Taking Shower After Ballgame.

It took quite a bit of courage for Freddie Hancock to get into the shower with all his teammates after the neighborhood donkey-basketball game for a local charity. "I thought I felt a pin prick when I bent over awhile ago!" yelled Billy Ray Johnso...
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Funny story: Brenda Song & Rob Pattinson vow to stay virgins till marriage!

Brenda Song & Rob Pattinson vow to stay virgins till marriage!

Teen queen, Brenda Song and Twilight hottie Rob Pattinson have vowed to stay virgins till marriage. The teen sensations wear purity rings, Brenda and Rob, both 19, reportedly wear metal bands on their fingers to symbolize. Rob thinks of it as, "a pro...
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Funny story: Mother of Octuplets Is Pregnant Again!

Mother of Octuplets Is Pregnant Again!

BELLFLOWER, California - Nadya Suleman, the woman who gave birth to octuplets ten days ago is pregnant. It is amazing. It is unbelievable. But it is true. Ms. Suleman says that she took an EPT test and the results show that she is in fact pregnant...
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Funny story: Men with Big Penises Live Longer, Happier, More Satisfying and Productive Lives

Men with Big Penises Live Longer, Happier, More Satisfying and Productive Lives

Duke University, NC- After decades of research by sociologists, psychologists, statististions, anthropologists and astrologers it has been determined, without any doubt, that men with large penises live longer, happier, more satisfying and productive...
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Funny story: Pattinson and Stewart: Together?

Pattinson and Stewart: Together?

It seems that stars Rob Pattinson and Kristen Stewart , are together. The two were spotted hugging and laughing at an event in Wallenpaupack, Pennsylvania. "They are just friends. Nothing bad was going on. They're young, they have the right to ha...
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Funny story: Sarah Palin's Vagina Diagnosed with Down Syndrome

Sarah Palin's Vagina Diagnosed with Down Syndrome

Alaska Governor Sarah Palin's Press Secretary Meghan Stapleton has issued a press release which comes close to explaining the former Vice Presidential candidate's often puzzling comments and behavior. It seems Palin's vagina has been diagnosed wit...
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Funny story: "OctuMom" Admits She Has Never Had Sex

"OctuMom" Admits She Has Never Had Sex

BELLFLOWER, California - The 33-year-old mother of octuplets and six other children has admitted to Katie Couric that she has never had sex. In an exclusive interview mom said that yes, she is technically a virgin, since all of her 14 children wer...
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Funny story: Top Swimwear Model Announced

Top Swimwear Model Announced

She turned the head of actor Leonard DiCaprio and now Bar Refaeli will have men around the world turning the pages of Sports Illustrated, as the model with 4 Buttocks bared mostly all for the cover of the magazine's widely-read swimsuit issue. Ref...
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Funny story: Jade Goody all set for role in Eastenders

Jade Goody all set for role in Eastenders

Cancer ridden tabloid cod piece Jade Goody was said to be delighted after the make a wish foundation granted her wish of appearing in long running BBC television show eastenders. It's thought the former big brother, celebrity big brother and racis...
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Funny story: Joseph Mengele Diaries Found in South America

Joseph Mengele Diaries Found in South America

The secret diaries and notebooks of Nazi Doctor Joseph Mengele have been discovered in the library collection of a Catholic Church in Buenos Aires, Argentina. Mengele, known as the Doctor of Death, was responsible for experimentation on Jews in the...
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Funny story: LeBron James Traded To The Los Angeles Lakers

LeBron James Traded To The Los Angeles Lakers

CLEVELAND - NBA superstar LeBron James has been traded by the Cleveland Cavaliers to the Los Angeles Lakers. In a surprise move that left the NBA world stunned beyond belief King James will be going west to join the Los Angeles Lakers who currentl...
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Funny story: Jamie Lynn pregnant again soon after 1st baby!

Jamie Lynn pregnant again soon after 1st baby!

Jamie Lynn Spears revealed yesterday that she's single, and pregnant again. Her now ex-boyfriend, Casey Aldridge says that "Jamie's going to be ok. We're still friends..." Jamie's mom said: "She's doing ok, actually. We still are a bit shocked...
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Funny story: Flyers Announce: WallyMart Offers Big Rollback On Condoms!

Flyers Announce: WallyMart Offers Big Rollback On Condoms!

WallyMart has announced that their "natural lambskin" condoms are being rolled back not only for a lower price but for a snugger, tighter fit. "And", added the retail giant, "these boxes are labeled by code and not by size so even your cashier wo...
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Funny story: Jade Goody to live out days in Big Brother House

Jade Goody to live out days in Big Brother House

A deal has been struck whereby the producers of Big Brother will transform the BB House into a Hospice where Jade Goody will spend her final days. A spokesman for Inyerface Media said "Basically the BB format will be followed, but obviously there...
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Funny story: Britney Spears Invents Bra Phone-Holder, Lingerie Company Interested

Britney Spears Invents Bra Phone-Holder, Lingerie Company Interested

In what sounds like a slam-dunk, sure-fire thing, an idea by Britney Spears and a top lingerie company are hammering out a multimillion dollar deal for her to endorse a new line of sexy, lacy bras for plugged-in babes. The new bras will be featu...
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Funny story: Teen queen, Brenda Song & Rob Pattinson spotted on a date!

Teen queen, Brenda Song & Rob Pattinson spotted on a date!

Teen queen, Brenda Song and Twilight hottie Rob Pattinson have been spotted on a romantic date in Studio City, Hollywood. Earlier this week, Brenda was seen at Rob's new $3 million apartment in Tribeca. The stars shared an ice cream bowl. The paparaz...
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Funny story: Jon Leaves Kate With Eight!

Jon Leaves Kate With Eight!

Jon Gosselin, 31 , has split from wife , Kate Gosselin , 33. He's also leaving the children with her. So Mady, Cara, Collin, Leah, Hannah, Joel, Aaden, and Alexis will have visiting hours set to be with Jon. In an interview, Jon tells that "some...
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Funny story: "Octuplet's Mom's" Sperm Donor Comes Out Of Hiding

"Octuplet's Mom's" Sperm Donor Comes Out Of Hiding

BELLFLOWER, California - The man responsible for donating the sperm that created eight babies has finally come forward. David Solomon, (aka The Sperm Donor) told a reporter for CNN that the reason he had not come out before is because he suffers f...
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Funny story: Robbie Keane Wore Spurs Scarf At Liverpool v. Chelsea Game Last Sunday

Robbie Keane Wore Spurs Scarf At Liverpool v. Chelsea Game Last Sunday

Fans who were sitting near Robbie Keane at Anfield last Sunday during the Liverpool v. Chelsea game, have said that even before his transfer back to White Hart Lane had been announced, the player was wearing a Tottenham scarf around his neck. Kean...
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Funny story: The Search For President Obama's Nickname

The Search For President Obama's Nickname

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Barack Obama's top aides are trying to figure out a nice catchy nickname to use for the president. One aide suggested to simply use his three initials, BHO (Barack Hussein Obama). But that idea was quickly shot down b...
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Funny story: Duffy's Ass Breaks Record at Brits

Duffy's Ass Breaks Record at Brits

We learned today that Welsh singing sensation Duffy had to change her outfit part way through the Brits Awards due to a mishap in the interval. It seems she inadvertently broke an eight metre Gold Disc display with her pert buttock shelf when she tu...
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Funny story: Porn star Stormy Daniels vows to 'join all the other whores in the Senate'

Porn star Stormy Daniels vows to 'join all the other whores in the Senate'

Washington AC/DC - (Horny Ass Mess): Enormous-bosomed peroxide porn star Stormy Daniels has vowed to 'join all the other whores in the Senate' by challenging David Ritter for the Louisiana Senator's seat. "My hot ass is a lot perkier than that abs...
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Funny story: Steven Seagal Injured in Guitar Hero Accident

Steven Seagal Injured in Guitar Hero Accident

Action movie star Steven Seagal was admitted to hospital last week after suffering a sprained testicle while playing the popular Guitar Hero game on the Xbox 360. Seagal is claimed to have been attempting the elusive 'Double Whammy-Bar Deflect wit...
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Funny story: Gordon Brown - "Jade Goody is the People's Princess"

Gordon Brown - "Jade Goody is the People's Princess"

The Prime Minister Gordon Brown took time off running the economy yesterday to comment on the latest news about Jade Goody. He came out of Number 10 and spoke to waiting journalists. "The whole of our country, all of us, will be in a state of shoc...
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Funny story: American Idol's "Bikini Girl" To Appear In Magazine

American Idol's "Bikini Girl" To Appear In Magazine

HOLLYWOOD, California - Katrina Darrell, better known as "Bikini Girl" was recently eliminated from the singing competition show American Idol. But Katrina, who is a sexy-looking 20-year-old California babe will soon be crying all the way to the b...
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Funny story: Teen queen, Brenda Song & Rob Pattinson Dating

Teen queen, Brenda Song & Rob Pattinson Dating

Brenda and Rob, both 20, are set to star in the upcoming indie film, Burning Star. The pair have been seen on a date and apparently, they been seeing each other for several months. The pair reportedly wear matching rings, and have kept their relat...
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Funny story: President Obama's and President Bush's Communication Skills Examined

President Obama's and President Bush's Communication Skills Examined

Washington DC: Dr. Kartoffel Kopf, a visiting professor from the Dusseldorf School of Linguistics, has been lecturing here in the USA about how great leaders communicate. He has postulated an analytical model to measure the information contained in a...
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Funny story: U2's "The Edge" changes name to "Bono"

U2's "The Edge" changes name to "Bono"

A spokeman for world topping band U2, has confirmed that the band's lead guitarist "The Edge" (real name David Howell Evans) has today finalised the legal documentation to change his name to "Bono". The lead signer of the band, "Bono" (real name P...
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Funny story: Federer "I quit" - tennis world in shock

Federer "I quit" - tennis world in shock

Roger Federer, until recently the worlds' no.1 tennis player, has decided to quit. The superstar, who was beaten by Spaniard Rafa Nadal in the Australian Open on Sunday, declared, "You know, I've really tried to play my best game this last year a...
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Funny story: Google Earth Discovers the EU is a Big Dick

Google Earth Discovers the EU is a Big Dick

Google Earth has enabled many onlookers to get googlely eyed about the earth. Giles Cocknbull used Google earth to watch his girlfriend Hortensia mow the lawn of her neighbor, Bull Meacham. Virtual hikes of the Grand canyon, make believe climbs of Ev...
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Funny story: If Britney Can Go Without Underwear, So Can I?

If Britney Can Go Without Underwear, So Can I?

Peter Showman (Not his real name), 51, was "adamant," according to England's Kettering Evening Telegraph, that he had the right to wear whatever outfits he wanted, even though his favorite hangout was in front of Woodville Primary school in the morni...
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Funny story: Jolie To Star in "The Octuplet's Mom" Movie

Jolie To Star in "The Octuplet's Mom" Movie

LOS ANGELES, California - Angelina Jolie has been signed to star in the new movie "The Octuplet's Mom." Jolie will portray the California Super Mom who recently gave birth to octuplets in Kaiser Permanente Hospital in Bellflower, California. T...
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Funny story: Hilary Duff announced that she's having plastic surgery - just to fit in!

Hilary Duff announced that she's having plastic surgery - just to fit in!

Hilary Duff, 21, has announced that she's going to have a breast augmentation. "I just feel I need this to fit in with the other celebrities that have done it," says Duff, "it would make me feel better about myself..." YIKES! She says she's g...
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Funny story: Tatiana Del Toro to open for David Archuleta on tour

Tatiana Del Toro to open for David Archuleta on tour

Hollywood, Calif. - Reports are leaking out that American Idol contestant Tatiana Del Toro will be the opening for Idol second place runner up David Archuleta for his upcoming tour. Tatiana has been one of the most talked about contestants this year...
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Funny story: Demi Moore now "Too Ugly" to strip

Demi Moore now "Too Ugly" to strip

Demi Moore has received some shocking news from her agent, Frank Telling. Telling has told her the reason she has been rebuffed from several parts that she auditioned for in recent months. "Basically," said Misty Morning, Telling's assistant, "she...
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Funny story: Madonna To Auction More Nude Pictures For Obama Stimulus

Madonna To Auction More Nude Pictures For Obama Stimulus

(Los Angeles-CA) Directly on the heels or insert the body part of your choice of this week's Christie's auction of a full frontal nude photograph of Madonna selling for over $37,000.00, the original Material Girl announced today at a Regent Beverly W...
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Funny story: Did Video Games Console kill Jade Goody?

Did Video Games Console kill Jade Goody?

Possible exposure to a video games console may have caused the cancer in Jade Goody, scientists have proved perhaps. Shocking revelations from the Polytechnico of Juventius di Milano departmento di speculananio reveal the Japanese console popular...
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Funny story: Johnny Depp To Star As A Gay Mexican Astronaut

Johnny Depp To Star As A Gay Mexican Astronaut

HOLLYWOOD, California - Columbia Pictures in association with Mexico's Guacamole Films has just announced that Johnny Depp will be starring in their motion picture "Gay Jose, Can You See By The Dawn's Early Light?" The movie which will be shot dow...
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Funny story: Paris Hilton Unearths Missing Super Bowl Rings

Paris Hilton Unearths Missing Super Bowl Rings

It seems Paris Hilton has solved a mystery that has puzzled American football fans for months. Initially it was reported that the New York Giants' Super Bowl Rings were stolen in a heist. It now appears that story was an elaborate cover up. Info...
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Funny story: Everton v. Liverpool FA Cuptie To Go To Penalty Shoot-Out, After Doubt Cast On 'Goal'

Everton v. Liverpool FA Cuptie To Go To Penalty Shoot-Out, After Doubt Cast On 'Goal'

An emergency meeting of the FA at Lancaster Gate today, has decided that the FA Cup fourth round replay between Everton and Liverpool, should be taken to an extraordinary penalty shoot-out after severe doubt was cast on Everton's 'goal'. Viewers w...
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Funny story: Pattinson: America is cramping my style!

Pattinson: America is cramping my style!

Robert Pattinson, heart throb to girls all over the world and international superstar has been heard to have said that he can't wait for the filming of "New Moon" - the gripping sequel to twilight - to have finished filming so he can go back to his a...
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Funny story: Jade Goody To Divorce

Jade Goody To Divorce

Yes, it's true. The news we all feared has arrived. Poor Jade Goody is set for a divorce. Close friends (?) said that Jade came home from a hospital appointment to find her husband in bed with Shilpa Shetty. "It was too much for Jade to take." Cl...
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Funny story: Slumdog Sideshow: Rohan Antao, Freida Pinto's Ex, Blames Bollywood For Break-up

Slumdog Sideshow: Rohan Antao, Freida Pinto's Ex, Blames Bollywood For Break-up

Rohan Antao, former fiance of Slumdog star, Freida Pinto, blames the movies success and Pinto's costar Dev Patel for breaking them up. A report in News Of The World, Antao is quoted as saying , "The film bosses at Bollywood didn't want her to be e...
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Funny story: Vaginas and peckers go virtual reality

Vaginas and peckers go virtual reality

Silicone vaginas and penises, part of a new virtual reality package offered by Microsoft Corporation makes its debut this weekend, and CEO Bill Gates, as usual, is behind the state of the art hardware and software for the game experience. Said to...
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Funny story: Woman Sets Breast Record, 38KKK

Woman Sets Breast Record, 38KKK

A woman underwent nine breast-implant surgeries, even leaving the country, to set the world record for the largest bust. People...well..men.. were already fairly impressed last April, when they heard that one Sheyla Hershey traveled to Houston for...
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Funny story: Ellen DeGeneres And Her Wife To Adopt Octuplets

Ellen DeGeneres And Her Wife To Adopt Octuplets

BEVERLY HILLS, California - In a surprising move, talk show host Ellen DeGeneres, 51, has announced that she and Mrs. DeGeneres, aka Portia de Rossi, 36, are adopting the famous octuplets. Ellen recently met the octuplets' mother at a local Subway...
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Funny story: John Terry - I'm No Ladyboy

John Terry - I'm No Ladyboy

England footballer John Terry has come out and denied that he is actually a cross dressing pervert. Recent revelations in the British gutter press suggested that 'Lucky' Lucy Smith was a looky-likey for the Chelsea captain. Strapping Big John...
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Funny story: Shilpa Shetty voodoo hex blamed for Goody woes

Shilpa Shetty voodoo hex blamed for Goody woes

London - (Karmic Crap Mess): BNP fans of Jade Goody's 2007 Celebrity Racist Big Brother rant are in hiding this weekend after blaming a Shilpa Shetty 'voodoo hex' for the stricken reality TV contestant's woes. "Shetty invoked the wrath of Kali, go...
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Funny story: "OctuMom" Receives $1 Million To Star In Skin Flick

"OctuMom" Receives $1 Million To Star In Skin Flick

WHITTIER, California - The world famous octuplet's mom has just signed a $1 million contract to star in a porn movie. Cicero Spoongate who is the president of LabiaLand Pictures says that the motion picture will be shot on location in Lake Tahoe,...
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Funny story: Higgs Boson discovered - Cern 'furious'

Higgs Boson discovered - Cern 'furious'

The elusive Higgs Boson, the so-called 'God Particle' has been discovered by three schoolboys working with a home-made particle accelerator. The boys, all aged thirteen and from The Francis Howard Academy in York, built the accelerator from bits and...
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Funny story: Obama Admits He Has Multiple Tattoos

Obama Admits He Has Multiple Tattoos

New United States President Barack Hussein Obama admitted yesterday that he has multiple tattoes. "Body Art" is not original in the Oval Office to this President as many previous Presidents served in the military. Obama is the first, however, to ha...
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Funny story: COO melamine aspartame scare smokes out secret bar code scanners for the elite

COO melamine aspartame scare smokes out secret bar code scanners for the elite

GENEVA, Switzerland - UPDATE 1 - Hot on the heals of the country of origin (COO) secret melamine bar code revelation comes an even more shocking cover-up. "Not funny", is the plaintive cry of industry associations in response to the original revelat...
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Funny story: Satan retires, goals achieved

Satan retires, goals achieved

After several thousand years of mayhem, soul snatching, temptation, morality compromising, lust induction, and being the supreme causative factor in moving people to lie, cheat, rape, steal, and murder, Satan has decided to call it quits. Satan, a...
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Funny story: Derren Brown denies influencing Premier League goal chances

Derren Brown denies influencing Premier League goal chances

'Stay with me now'. We've all heard him say it and we've all watched him do it. But none of us can work out how he does it. Yet, despite the quite unbelievable number of missed goal scoring chances across the Premier League last weekend, the TV magic...
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Funny story: Octumom Runs Out of Names

Octumom Runs Out of Names

California - The embattled Octumom is in the news again admitting that she has run out of ideas on what to name her new children. "I'm stumped. My six other children are all named Bob so this is really confusing." "I thought if I called them all B...
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Funny story: Princess Margaret caught Aids from gangster lover/crack dealer Bindon

Princess Margaret caught Aids from gangster lover/crack dealer Bindon

London - (Sordid Cold Whore Mess): Bitter and twisted mobster's moll Princess Margaret died from complications linked to Aids and cocaine addiction after becoming contaminated by her gangster crack dealer lover John Bindon according to a TV docu-dram...
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Funny story: Black Children's TV presenter "scares young viewers"

Black Children's TV presenter "scares young viewers"

A children's TV channel came in for criticism last night when complaints were made about its new presenter Simon Churchill who some parents claimed "scared their kids". Churchill, 26, whose grandfather was from Jamaica and settled in the the UK in...
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Funny story: Penis Monologues, Sequel to Vagina Monologues, Debuts on Broadway

Penis Monologues, Sequel to Vagina Monologues, Debuts on Broadway

The Penis Monologues, a sequel to the very popular and award winning The Vagina Monologues, is scheduled for a Friday evening opening on Broadway. The play has is about men and their relationship with their reproductive organs. All shows for the...
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Funny story: Squirrel Woman Accused of Collecting Men's Nuts

Squirrel Woman Accused of Collecting Men's Nuts

Rumors abound about a squirrel woman and her insatiable appetite for collecting men's nuts. Hospitals are reporting an unusual number of balless males appearing in emergency rooms hysterically screaming about their missing testicles and one or anothe...
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Funny story: Porn Free

Porn Free

The Sport Daily Newspaper announced today that it intends to go Porn Free from next month. The racy red-top has decided to remove all stories and photographs of a blatantly sexual nature from its pages. In fact, anything the least bit saucy will be...
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Funny story: New York Post Attempts "Clarification" With New Cartoon

New York Post Attempts "Clarification" With New Cartoon

New York, New York: Mere days after the New York Post published what was first thought to be one hilarious cartoon involving President Obama's economic policies and a chimpanzee shot dead, The New York Post has published yet another cartoon in order...
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Funny story: 1-seater smart forone Car Planned

1-seater smart forone Car Planned

A car manufacturer has bought the rights to 1960's classic Peel P50 microcar to make the smart forone. Following yesterday's coverage of the new clockwork smart fortwo, we can today report that it has also been announced that the manufacturer will...
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Funny story: Jade Goody To Have State Funeral

Jade Goody To Have State Funeral

Jade Goody, the former Big Brother contestant who has recently captured the hearts of the nation with her cancer-suffering, will be given a state funeral after her death. The body of bald-headed Jade, who was married to a criminal this week, will...
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Funny story: Goody to Become Saint

Goody to Become Saint

Former 'Big Brother' contestant and tabloid revenue-stream Jade Goody is to be beatified by His Holiness Pope Benedict XVI, it was announced today, in recognition of her tireless work to benefit race relations. The move, which is the result of a c...
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Funny story: Fishy tales: nuclear sub crash captain 'was smashed on skunk'

Fishy tales: nuclear sub crash captain 'was smashed on skunk'

Atlantic Ocean - (Merde Alors! Mess): Ministry of Defence sources have blamed the recreational smoking habits of Capt Rongleur for the stricken French submarine Le Triomphant's mid-Atlantic prang with HMS Vanguard The two vessels crashed into one...
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Funny story: 3500 Year Old Egyptian Tomb Reveals a Strange Inscription

3500 Year Old Egyptian Tomb Reveals a Strange Inscription

Cairo Egypt: An archeological expedition to Egypt's Valley of the Kings has reported finding a strange inscription inside the innermost burial chamber of a 3500 year old Pyramid. The inscription @*$! #%* was written on a wall. Dr. Jones the head...
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Funny story: New Atlantis sighting 'is pre-Lemurian UFO airport runway'

New Atlantis sighting 'is pre-Lemurian UFO airport runway'

Atlantic Ocean - (Grateful Dead Sea Scrolls Mess): Thames Estuary Airport backers are elated at reports that an Atlantean 'grid of streets' captured on satellite may be a 'pre-Lemurian UFO airport runway' and not the remains of the fabled ancient Cit...
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Funny story: Man finds solitary remaining new way to masturbate, exhausts it

Man finds solitary remaining new way to masturbate, exhausts it

In an emotional rollercoaster of a journey last night, a local man uncovered the solitary remaining exciting way to masturbate that had been out of his reach for some time. The joy, quickly turned to sadness for that man however, as the thrill of...
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Funny story: "Bikini Girl" Dating Tony Romo of The Dallas Cowboys

"Bikini Girl" Dating Tony Romo of The Dallas Cowboys

LOS ANGELES - Ex-Hooter's Girl and 2009 "American Idol" reject Katrina Darrell was seen at L.A.'s trendy nightclub, The Libido Lounge in the company of none other than Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo. When a reporter for La Raunchy Review Mag...
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Funny story: Robin Williams Lip Syncs for Geithner: US Can't Print Money Fast Enough to Keep up With Corruption and World Welfare!

Robin Williams Lip Syncs for Geithner: US Can't Print Money Fast Enough to Keep up With Corruption and World Welfare!

Washington, DC/ All the News Fit to Print from The Mint and Then Some! - Newly minted Secretary of Treasury, Tim Geithner, appearing at a hastily called news conference with his tie poorly knotted and his shoes untied, hastened through a brief report...
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Funny story: Human rights lawyer sues himself

Human rights lawyer sues himself

Controversial Canadian human rights lawyer Richard Warman sparked more furore last night when he announced he was suing himself. In a press statement, Warman said that he had come to realise that his attempts to stop people like conspiracy theoris...
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Funny story: Mick Jagger lands J Howard Marshall III role in Royal Opera House's Anna Nicole Smith life story

Mick Jagger lands J Howard Marshall III role in Royal Opera House's Anna Nicole Smith life story

London - (Wrinkly Ass Mess): Ageing sexagerian crooner Mick Jagger is to play the role of Texan oil billionaire J Howard Marshall III in the Royal Opera House's production of Anna Nicole Smith's life story. The title role is still up for grabs alt...
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Funny story: Jai Ho! "Slumdog Millionaire" kids return home to India; a heroes welcome turns...ugly

Jai Ho! "Slumdog Millionaire" kids return home to India; a heroes welcome turns...ugly

Mumbai, India - Still laughing and smiling as they were all during their whirlwind trip to Hollywood, California, walking the red carpet on the night of the Oscars, bumping elbows with international movie stars instead members of their overpopulated...
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Funny story: Jade Goody Furious With God

Jade Goody Furious With God

Jade Goody, the thing that made its name by appearing on the Channel 4 shows Big Brother and Celebrity Big Brother, has told reporters that she is absolutely furious with God. Goody, who has terminal cancer, and is expected to live only a few more...
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Funny story: American Idol's "Legs Girl" Told To Walk

American Idol's "Legs Girl" Told To Walk

LOS ANGELES - Jeanine Vailes, the bartender whose wardrobe consists of 17 denim short shorts was told by the "American Idol" voters to head on back to the bar as fast as her much-publicized legs will take her. Both Paula (Abdul) and Simon (Cowell)...
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Funny story: Hillary Clinton slaps French President's wife

Hillary Clinton slaps French President's wife

The newly appointed Secretary of State Hillary Clinton has reportedly slapped the French President's wife Carla Bruni Sarkozy last night in New York. They were attending a fund raising dinner held in the aid of procrastinator's around the world wh...
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Funny story: Donny Osmond Denies He's The Octuplet's Daddy

Donny Osmond Denies He's The Octuplet's Daddy

SALT LAKE CITY - Donny Osmond has told CNN's Anderson Cooper that he has no idea where in the world the rumor came from but he emphatically denies that he is the father of "OctuMom's" eight babies. Osmond, singer, musician, ex-teen idol told Coope...
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Funny story: Hip Hop Harry, Sponge Bob Squarepants and C-Funk arrested for hit on Barney

Hip Hop Harry, Sponge Bob Squarepants and C-Funk arrested for hit on Barney

There is breaking news this morning out of Compton, California where police just arrested Hip Hop Harry, C-Funk, and Sponge Bob Squarepants for the drive-by shooting of Barney, the purple dinosaur loved dearly by millions of children nationwide. W...
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Funny story: New "Ponzi!" game is huge hit

New "Ponzi!" game is huge hit

People are "going bananas", say the makers, for a new boardgame called "Ponzi!", released last week. In the game, players start with 3 houses and £3million each, then take as much money as possible plus bonus on the first "year" (circuit of board...
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Funny story: Man with nanopenis consummates marriage

Man with nanopenis consummates marriage

A 35 year old married man, formerly of Italy, now residing in Littledick, TX, has finally gotten his wife of 10 years pregnant, by proxy, after many, many attempts. The man's name, Canno Finda Mydicka, you see, was born with a "nanopenis" which c...
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Funny story: Chris Brown Apologizes To Rihanna, His Fans, Father Sarduccci, Guy Doing Interview

Chris Brown Apologizes To Rihanna, His Fans, Father Sarduccci, Guy Doing Interview

According to the Los Angeles Amplifier, Chris Brown says he is seeking counseling from loved ones and family members, one week after an alleged attack against his girlfriend, singer Rihanna. "Words cannot begin to express how sorry and saddened an...
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Funny story: President Barack Obama's Prized Bong is Missing

President Barack Obama's Prized Bong is Missing

White House security personnel admit that they are unable to locate President Barack Obama's $1,200.00 Roor Custom Little Sista Icemaster 7.0 Bong that appears to have been stolen from his dresser in his bedroom and they have few clues as to who may...
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Funny story: Researchers Find Marijuana Substitute

Researchers Find Marijuana Substitute

With the US Food and Drug Administration (FDA) cracking down hard on marijuana users and suppliers, researchers have discovered a synthetic compound that mimics the drugs benefits. Researchers at the University of California Berkeley have discover...
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46
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