Funny story: Outbreak of Paper Cuts Prompts Action From Obama

Outbreak of Paper Cuts Prompts Action From Obama

Washington [UPI] - A sudden increase in the number of paper cuts sustained by harried administrative staff in national parks has prompted President Obama to ask Treasury to earmark 1 billion dollars in emergency federal funding to, as the President p...
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Funny story: Illuminati prophecy fortells Hitler's daughter will die on 64th anniversary of father's Berlin Bunker suicide

Illuminati prophecy fortells Hitler's daughter will die on 64th anniversary of father's Berlin Bunker suicide

London - (Doomsday Mess): It's all in the numbers, folks... And numerology freaks are tumescent with expectation that this May Day's 333rd anniversary of the founding of the Bavarian Illuminati will see the death 'by auto-erotic waterboarding' of Hi...
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Funny story: Disease Control Warns: Swine Flu May Actually Enjoy Alcohol Based Hand-Sanitizers

Disease Control Warns: Swine Flu May Actually Enjoy Alcohol Based Hand-Sanitizers

In a press release Thursday, a disease control representative warned that alcohol based hand sanitizers are not effective against swine flu, and may in fact be promoting its spread. "The data is still coming in, but preliminary reports point to an...
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Funny story: Famous cliche disprover teaches an old dog a new trick

Famous cliche disprover teaches an old dog a new trick

British eccentric Lord Michael St-Daniels, famous for having spent a number of years tirelessly disproving famous clich├ęs, has taken another phrase down today as it was announced that he has succeeded in teaching an old dog a new trick. Specifical...
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Funny story: Shock New Poet Laureate announced

Shock New Poet Laureate announced

The new Poet Laureate has been announced by the Queen this morning, following the standing down of Andrew Motion. However the predicted successor Carol Ann Duffy was left speechless (and indeed Rhyme-less) when it was announced that the actual new...
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Funny story: Stockport FC go into Administration as High Street Sales drop

Stockport FC go into Administration as High Street Sales drop

League One football club, and high street purveyor of discount items has announced that it is to go into Administration today. The club, which is most famous for its Pick 'N' Mix brand has suffered in the recession as shoppers have abandoned the h...
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Funny story: Swine Flu TV shows to launch in June

Swine Flu TV shows to launch in June

It has been announced today that 2 new TV shows, based around sufferers of Swine Flu will be launched in June. "Come Swine with me" will see 6 selected members of the public, all suffering from the disease, taking turns to cook a 3 course meal fro...
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Funny story: Nigerian Women Go On Sex Strike

Nigerian Women Go On Sex Strike

Sisters rejoice! The women of Nigeria have issued their partners with an ultimatum: Either you guys sort out a solution to the tribal differences and feuds which so afflict our great nation, or we women will go on sex strike. It's that simple. No tru...
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Funny story: MP's pass new suprise "Monopoly " expense plans

MP's pass new suprise "Monopoly " expense plans

The latest news from the House of Commons is that Members of Parliament have approved the new proposed expense measures by a narrow margin. The revised process will restrict the amounts that MPs are able to claim and are designed to ensure a great...
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Funny story: Chrysler's Collapse inspires new TV series: "Bankruptcy Court TV"

Chrysler's Collapse inspires new TV series: "Bankruptcy Court TV"

Detroit, Michigan - For the first-time ever, with the fate of millions of American jobs on the line, Bankruptcy Court has the potential of becoming just as interesting as a murder trial. At least that is what the producers of the popular Court TV are...
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Funny story: Iraq 'Open For Business' Says Brown

Iraq 'Open For Business' Says Brown

In a landmark speech this morning, Prime Minister Gordon Brown finally announced the end of British military combat operations in Iraq, and told massed ranks of reporters that the country was now officially "open for business". Speaking alongside...
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Funny story: Spoofer Stands In Indian Election

Spoofer Stands In Indian Election

Naresh Singh Bhadouriya, the spoof superstar of India's burgeoning internet entertainment network who regularly hits daily viewing figures in excess of 100,000 on the Indian arm of the spoof empire is to run for President. Mister Bhadouriya, of Ut...
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Funny story: Pig Flu - The Global Response

Pig Flu - The Global Response

As the entire world waits in dread anticipation of that first tell-tale sneeze, withering under the threat of a global pandemic which could see off millions, it's comforting to know that governments the world over are pitching in to do their bit to s...
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Funny story: Spoof writer is furious as his story becomes reality!

Spoof writer is furious as his story becomes reality!

There is as saying that "the truth is a stranger than fiction" but now it could be said that "TheSpoof.com is no stranger than reality". It can be a frightening experience when you see an idea you once had, come to life. It also makes you wonder wh...
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Funny story: Tweed Needs Protection

Tweed Needs Protection

Reports that convict Jack Tweed has suffered appalling abuse at the hands of 'Boy' George O'Dowd have been confirmed by sources at St. Edmund's Hill jail in Suffolk. "It has been a living nightmare for Jack," said a fellow prisoner. "It started on...
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Funny story: Siegfried Fishbacher Makes Regis Disappear

Siegfried Fishbacher Makes Regis Disappear

In a special one night performance in New York City, Siegfried Fishbacher did a one-man magic show to raise funds for a charity that he and his partner, Roy Horn have supported for years. Roy Horn was there, but sitting in the audience. After rece...
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Funny story: Obama sold on Chrysler's new concept car: "The Homer-Mobile"

Obama sold on Chrysler's new concept car: "The Homer-Mobile"

Motor City - Saved by a government bailout for the second time by holding its employees hostage for a second time, the buzz around Capitol Hill is that Chrysler won over President Barack Obama with new concept car design they call: "The Obama-Mobile"...
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Funny story: Sion Simon MP blames Susan Boyle and TheSpoof.com for downfall!

Sion Simon MP blames Susan Boyle and TheSpoof.com for downfall!

Sion Simon, MP and 'all round' pot to toss in, has claimed he was cajoled by imaginary writer Monkey Woods, to say unfunny and daft things about Caledonian Cutie Dame Susan Boyle. The Spoof-writer of notable but not great talent, implied Susie may...
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Funny story: New Book Says A-Rod Took Steroids Since High School

New Book Says A-Rod Took Steroids Since High School

Alex Rodriquez may have bulked up with steroids as early as high school - and was suspected of juicing all the while he's been playing for the New York Yankees, a bombshell of a new book reports. Although the slugger insists he dabbled in steroids...
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Funny story: Swine Flu Causes Mexico To Shut Down All Cockfights

Swine Flu Causes Mexico To Shut Down All Cockfights

MEXICO CITY - The president of Mexico Nacho Winslow has mandated that due to the swine flu epidemic all cockfights, legal or illegal will be immediately terminated. Winslow spoke with Mango Rio Grande, the director of the The Mexican Cockfighting...
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Funny story: Swine Flu Latest: Kissing Banned In Mexico

Swine Flu Latest: Kissing Banned In Mexico

There was pandemonium in Mexico today, when authorities in the capital, Mexico City, announced that, with immediate effect, kissing has been banned. The country has been identified as the epidemic epicentre of the Swine Flu outbreak catastrophe di...
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Funny story: Sneezy From Seven Dwarves Dies Of Swine Flu

Sneezy From Seven Dwarves Dies Of Swine Flu

The worldwide swine flu pandemic has claimed another victim with the death of the lovable Sneezy from the Seven Dwarves, according to media reports. "All the signs were there, I don't know how I don't spot it sooner," said Doc, one of the remainin...
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Funny story: Wild Swine Flu Theories Going Around The World

Wild Swine Flu Theories Going Around The World

Although most people are not panicking despite the Chicken Little approach adopted by virtually the entire world's media over swine flu and the World Health Organization's upgrade of the threat level to Defcon 5 or whatever, lots of theories are runn...
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Funny story: Price of Soap, Hand Sanitizer Rises

Price of Soap, Hand Sanitizer Rises

In the wake of the recent swine flu scare, many Americans have been rushing to their local supermarkets to purchase soap and hand sanitizer. The recent high demand for these products has caused the prices for these products to go up tremendously.
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Funny story: Kenyan Women go on a Sex strike!

Kenyan Women go on a Sex strike!

Kenyan women have gone on a sex strike demanding their men be like the Somali pirates. The move came after 5 women were abducted by Somali men along the Kenyan coastline near Somalia. "Those guys look really skinny but have really tough hands" sai...
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Funny story: H1N1: FDA fast-tracks generic knockoff of Tamiflu with "Tami-flew"

H1N1: FDA fast-tracks generic knockoff of Tamiflu with "Tami-flew"

Madison Avenue, New York - Much like Tamiflu, "Tami-flew" works best as a security blanket for panic-minded as like the brand name, its effectiveness against H1N1 (the so-called swine flu) has yet to be medically proven. However, that is not stopping...
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Funny story: Jack Nicholson Created The Swine Flu Pandemic?

Jack Nicholson Created The Swine Flu Pandemic?

The swine flu virus was created in a lab at UCLA in Southern California, the Chiang Mai (Thailand) Post has learned. The virus was then picked up by CIA operatives who transported it to an out of the way farm in rural Mexico where the pigs were infec...
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Funny story: Darling Decoded

Darling Decoded

After a week's detailed analysis, aided only by caffeine and barbiturates, it is now possible to bring you the unexpurgated, euphemism-free version of Alistair Darling's Budget speech: "Mr. Deputy Speaker, Honourable Members, and the scum in the public gallery, it is my sad duty to report that the nation is flat broke. Skint. Our finances are as sound as a council house roof. We have blown all...
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Funny story: Little Mexican Boy Blamed For Swine Flu Pandemic

Little Mexican Boy Blamed For Swine Flu Pandemic

DATELINE:JUAREZ-- The CDC and Homeland Security found the evil mastermind behind the Swine Flu outbreak in Mexico today. Juan de Pobre, aged 5, was arrested and taken to Gitmo for questioning. The little nino surrendered after a nine hour gun batt...
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Funny story: Swine Flu Health Warning Leaflet

Swine Flu Health Warning Leaflet

The UK Government's Regional Health Authorities have began sending out leaflets to householders throughout the UK relating to the impending Swine Flu Pandemic. The leaflets give comprehensive information regarding the Swine Flu. Below are just some of the recommendations given in the leaflet. DONT PANIC!!! (1) If you feel a tad under the weather it is with ABSOLUTE CERTAINTY that you h...
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Funny story: Dutch extreme right politician Geert Wilders invited by Obama to the Black House!

Dutch extreme right politician Geert Wilders invited by Obama to the Black House!

Geert Wilders the infamous Dutch extreme right politician who was refused entry into the mega-hypocritical UK has now been offered an official invitation by Obama to speak in front of the US senate. Obama feels that he was wrongly rejected by those t...
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Funny story: Obama Caught While Giving GM Some Head!

Obama Caught While Giving GM Some Head!

Washington, D.C. - Not since the days of Bill Clinton's cloakroom trysts has such a scandal rocked Washington. President Barrack Obama has been caught in a compromising position, giving GM some head. The financially troubled auto maker had recent...
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Funny story: Time-of-the-Month 100 names and shames Zac Effrontery

Time-of-the-Month 100 names and shames Zac Effrontery

New York - (Squalid Ass Mess): Time-of-the-Month magazine's eagerly awaited Top 100 Most Wannabe list has added teenage actor Zac Effrontery to its rankings. The 21 year-old High School Musical star was branded a deadbeat loser after two years of...
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Funny story: NATO expels Russian Plutonium-210 accomplices

NATO expels Russian Plutonium-210 accomplices

Brussels - (Rasputin Ass Mess): NATO military intelligence top brass has booted out two toxic Russian spooks after a radioactive con-trail from ex-KGB/Mossad turncoat Alexander Litvinenko RIP identified a crude cabal's attempt to seize EU snake oil a...
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Funny story: Dutch monarchy 'a train wreck'

Dutch monarchy 'a train wreck'

Apeldoorn, Holland - (Freaky Ass Mess): Dutch monarchy hoaxer Queen Beatrix is in a state of shock after police said an ominous Queen's Day parade car crash was 'an inside job'. Beatrix, 69, and her ragbag of sycophantic royal wannabes escaped unh...
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Funny story: Silk Purse Manufacturer Goes Under

Silk Purse Manufacturer Goes Under

Designer silk purse maker Louis Hamvuitton has called in the receivers after failing to secure supplies of suitable raw materials. Trading standards officers have confirmed that they can no longer make their products from sows' ears due to constrain...
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Funny story: Hawking to star in Terminator Prequel

Hawking to star in Terminator Prequel

Esteemed Cambridge Academic, Professor Stephen Hawking is to star in a Hollywood blockbuster playing a rogue Terminator. Hollywood movie Director Bernie Barnett explained that "Stephen will be starring in "The One That Got away". This prequel...
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Funny story: Government denies Swine fever masks cover-up

Government denies Swine fever masks cover-up

The government today vigorously denied claims that a mass issue of masks - ostensibly for the use of preventing the spread of swine fever - were in fact an attempt to cover-up the spread of panic amongst members of the government, which, it is claime...
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Funny story: Living Dinosaur found

Living Dinosaur found

A living member of the dinosaur family have been found in Pakistan and is pet to a 10 year old boy. The boy claims he found it as an egg in a berried cave near his village in rural Pakistan. He then placed it in an over to hatch and miraculously...
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Funny story: British Swine Flu Girl Thanked By Schoolfriends

British Swine Flu Girl Thanked By Schoolfriends

The British schoolgirl who, earlier this week, was diagnosed as having the Swine Flu virus, has been receiving cards and messages of thanks from many of her schoolfriends, who are glad of the extra time off from lessons that her illness has afforded...
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Funny story: Suicide Bomber: "I'm in it for the money and fame."

Suicide Bomber: "I'm in it for the money and fame."

During an interview with a suicide bomber we were told that 'suicide bombing is freedom of expression and that all men are free to express themselves'. On further questioning we were told that 'some men want to leave with a bang'. We were also...
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Funny story: Christian priest and Jewish rabbi caught having sex

Christian priest and Jewish rabbi caught having sex

A Christian priest and a Jewish rabbi we caught having sex inside a church. Both claimed that they had taken a vow of celibacy however Satan led them astray. They were actually having a debate on religion when both had a strong sexual urges findi...
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Funny story: Jesus Christ has returned

Jesus Christ has returned

A man claiming to be Jesus Christ has gathered large crowds in Jerusalem. This man is claiming to the the Messiah and that the 'End is Near'. He is asking to have a press conference with all the leaders of the World. He has asked all Jews, Christ...
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Funny story: End of times is here

End of times is here

Christian, Jew and Muslim scholars agree that the latest swine flu is the curse of God on mankind. 'Both the earthquakes and swine flu is proof that God is very angry with mankind' said a Jewish scholar. 'The end of times are here' said a Mus...
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Funny story: First Human Cloning Factory Built

First Human Cloning Factory Built

Scientists at CERN have defected and begun to build cloning machines. Because of their superior knowledge and supermotivation, the first cloning factory was built on the 30th of April, 2009, 30 seconds after the idea was conceived. "We're amazed...
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Funny story: Poll: Nine Out Of Ten Americans Fear Pineapples

Poll: Nine Out Of Ten Americans Fear Pineapples

Look out swine flu, there's a new paranoia sweeping the nation. Pineapples are now the most feared fruit on earth, surpassed only by the pomegranite, and are causing panic worldwide. Pineapples are normally docile creatures, but can have large outbursts of outrage, jabbing anyone nearby with their sharp spikes. They sometimes branch off and form clumps of wild pineapples, which should not be ap...
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Funny story: John McCain, the first hundred days

John McCain, the first hundred days

January 20 Watch on TV as that young punk Obama gets sworn in. They call me senile but he can't even get the oath right. Throw my glass of Metamucil at the screen. January 26 Al Gore called again wanting to commiserate over election loss. Boy, I hope I'm not that bitter eight years from now. Ask Cindy to order caller ID for our phone. February 2 Enjoy a break from work to wat...
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Funny story: Advisory from CRAP

Advisory from CRAP

Center for Responsible Appellation Policy RE: Erroneous and Misleading labeling of Influenza Outbreak It has come to the attention of the US Center for Responsible Appellation Policy (US CRAP) that the global porcine slander has become intolerable and reflects personal prejudice, not fact. Accordingly, new recommendations are being promulgated to more accurately reflect the source of this...
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Funny story: Melissa Rivers To Sue Donald Trump For Firing Her

Melissa Rivers To Sue Donald Trump For Firing Her

NEW YORK CITY - Melissa Rivers, the 41-year-old daughter of comedienne Joan Rivers was fired from "Celebrity Apprentice" by Donald Trump. Needless to say Melissa left, but she did not go easy. She walked out into the hall ranting and raving and de...
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Funny story: Swine Flu Epidemic Causes Vermont To Outlaw Handshaking

Swine Flu Epidemic Causes Vermont To Outlaw Handshaking

MONTPELIER, Vermont - The Vermont Senate reacting to an astounding statewide demand that the state do something to keep swine flu out of the state has just inacted Swine Flu Amendment 16-H. SFA 16-H strictly prohibits one individual from shaking t...
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Funny story: College to Add Pornography Concentration

College to Add Pornography Concentration

In a desperate effort to make money, a for-profit college Film and Photography college announced today that in addition to its usual photography and film making, it will now have a concentration in pornography. Like most for-profit schools, it has...
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Funny story: Police Protest Swine Flu

Police Protest Swine Flu

Law enforcement organizations around the world have herded together to denounce the association of the new worldwide influenza epidemic with pigs. Joining forces with the Pork Council, the originators of the new white meat ad campaign, police forces...
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Funny story: Angelina Jolie's father catches the swine flu

Angelina Jolie's father catches the swine flu

Angelina Jolie's father is in the hospital after contracting the notorious swine flu. His life long friend Elton John addressed the media outside the hospital. After being notified of her fathers condition, Angelina Jolie rushed to the hospital to...
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Funny story: Feminist in Afganistan infect the Taliban with swine flu

Feminist in Afganistan infect the Taliban with swine flu

Afganistan - An Afghan feminist has reportedly infected herself with the swine flu in Mexico and carried it back into the ranks of the Taliban. The woman whose name is yet known is in a Kabul hospital. One report tells that there may be as many as...
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Funny story: The Last Templar Speaks

The Last Templar Speaks

Washington DC: A Federal Communications Commission (FCC) panel was convened to hear testimony from the single holdout in the nation who has not upgraded his analog TV set to digital format. The FCC panel members were curious to know why Mr. Gates...
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Funny story: Swine Flu (H1N1): Man dies after taking counterfeit "Tamiflew" knockoff

Swine Flu (H1N1): Man dies after taking counterfeit "Tamiflew" knockoff

Los Angeles, California - With all the supply of Tamiflu being horded by the swine flu panic buying or kept on the shelf and out of the medicine cabinet due to price gauging, some people in desperation have turned to cheep medical counterfeit knockof...
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