Funny story: Britain's got Altnet - Simon Cowell's new show for dyslexics

Britain's got Altnet - Simon Cowell's new show for dyslexics

Simon Cowell, millionaire owner of incredibly, false-looking, implanted, Dulux-white teeth, who shot to fame and fortune by simply being a lucky bleeder in the right place at the right time, announced today that following on from his hit TV series &q...
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Funny story: Martians Warn Baseball Great

Martians Warn Baseball Great

ABC News has learned that, since landing on Mars, a message with strange characters has been taped to the external lens of one of the Phoenix Mars Lander's videocameras.
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Funny story: Olympic Stadium costs spiral out of control

Olympic Stadium costs spiral out of control

London 2012 officials have announced that the final cost of the Olympic Stadium could exceed one trillion (a 1 with many noughts after it) pounds, approximately 3,571.43 times the original estimated cost. Officials say the increase is primarily due t...
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Funny story: MPs vote to reestablish autocratic monarchy, public beheading

MPs vote to reestablish autocratic monarchy, public beheading

Britain is to become the world's newest dictatorship, ending centuries of contentious parliamentary rule and the farce of a purely ornamental monarchy.
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Funny story: Lassie To Become New American President

Lassie To Become New American President

In a surprise move, the White House today announced that Lassie will be the next US President.
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Funny story: Anger Over Sharon Stone's Quake Remarks

Anger Over Sharon Stone's Quake Remarks

There was much anger today over actress Sharon Stone's remarks that an earthquake was 'bad karma.' She made this claim after a tremor hit southern California yesterday, but refused to take it back.
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Funny story: Bush Declares War on Rocky Mountains

Bush Declares War on Rocky Mountains

President Bush announced today that these terrorist mountains caused tornadoes, hail and floods by launching leftist cold-hearted air to attack righteously-roaming warm air from the Republican Gulf of Mexico.
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Funny story: Kylie Is Not In The Top 40 Today

Kylie Is Not In The Top 40 Today

Singer and actress, Kylie Minogue, is yet again not in the top 40 today.
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Funny story: Space Station Crapper Crippled

Space Station Crapper Crippled

The crew of the International Space Station awoke to discover the toilet out-of-order this morning, requiring use of the "outhouse", otherwise known as the Soyuz escape capsule attached to the station.
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Funny story: British Man Escapes Death By Laser

British Man Escapes Death By Laser

A lucky British man escaped being cut in half by a giant laser while strapped to a metal table by a wealthy German evil genius. James Bond was captured and taken to a top-secret lair located inside an artificial volcano, where he was...
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Funny story: Can we fix it?

Can we fix it?

Jimmy Saville and Bob the Builder are currently in legal entanglements over who owns the copy-right to two words - Fix and it.
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Funny story: This Land Is My Land

This Land Is My Land

The anti-immigration militia group "Patriots Against Immigration and Naturalization" (PAIN) have released their version of the song "This Land is Our Land" called "This Land is My Land".
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Funny story: Isle of Man to add fourth leg to flag

Isle of Man to add fourth leg to flag

The Isle of Man has announced today that they will add another leg to their flag.
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Funny story: No fatalities in tube train crash - politicians blame Network Rail

No fatalities in tube train crash - politicians blame Network Rail

A major incident, earlier today, thankfully saw no casualties when an underground train from the Bakerloo Line ran aground off the coast at Ramsgate in Kent.
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Funny story: Intelligence Tests For American Presidents

Intelligence Tests For American Presidents

The FBI today announced that American Presidents will now have to undergo intelligence tests, before becoming the leader of the free world. This follows decades of Presidents with varying degrees of dumbness, and even outright senility, and the new m...
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Funny story: Cat's name change

Cat's name change

Following news that a Man in Finchley is being forced to change his Cat's name from David, a man in Nottingham has offered his name in exchange for the moniker of David.
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Funny story: Bush Shocked That McClellan Is Shocked

Bush Shocked That McClellan Is Shocked

In a statement today responding to Scott McClellan's claims that the former White House press secretary had been shocked to learn back in 2006 that President Bush had been having him fabricate tales for the American public's consumption, Pres...
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Funny story: Oil Prices At A 30-Year Low

Oil Prices At A 30-Year Low

Governments around the world breathed a collective sigh of relief this morning when, despite the price of oil reaching a record $140 per barrel, it was officially announced by OPEC that the size of barrels is now bigger than...
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Funny story: Knifed teen was not 'life and soul of the party' or 'loved by everyone'

Knifed teen was not 'life and soul of the party' or 'loved by everyone'

In an unusual turn of events, it was revealed that Dean Fenton, 17, of Peckham, who was stabbed to death last night in an apparent dispute outside a KFC, was not 'the life and soul of the party', 'loved by all who met him' or indeed &...
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Funny story: Bournemouth bans fire extinguishers as a danger to fires

Bournemouth bans fire extinguishers as a danger to fires

Very sensible risk assessors in Bournemouth - known as 'Wrinkly City' - have decided that fire extinguishers are to be banned from high rise flats in the city.
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Funny story: 24-hour drinking not being taught properly says Archbishop

24-hour drinking not being taught properly says Archbishop

In a scathing attack on the drinks industry, the Archbishop of Canterbury, Rowan Atkinson, riding high on the success of his new movie "Archbishop Bean", is one of several cross-religion senior clerics to slam 24-hour drinking.
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Funny story: NVQ in drug taking for professional criminals announced

NVQ in drug taking for professional criminals announced

Now that judges have deemed it fitting that thieves who steal to fund their drug, alcohol or gambling habits should be spared jail, Leicester University has announced an NVQ in drug taking, gambling and binge drinking.
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Funny story: John Bolton dismisses Hay-on-Wye arrest rumors

John Bolton dismisses Hay-on-Wye arrest rumors

Hay-on-Wye - (Spying Mess): Former Bush Administration under-secretary of state for arms proliferation John Bolton has laughed off suggestions he faces imminent arrest at a Hay-on-Wye literary festival lecture where he is due to talk about getting aw...
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Funny story: Lisa Nowak dissidents suspected behind trashing of ISS loo

Lisa Nowak dissidents suspected behind trashing of ISS loo

Outer Space - (Bodily Functions Mess): Sympathisers of former NASA astronut Capt Lisa Nowak are the main suspects behind the trashing of the International Space Station's only on-board lavatory according to reports today.
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Funny story: Putin fielding rent-a-mob at Chevron AGM

Putin fielding rent-a-mob at Chevron AGM

San Ramon, California - (Rabid Russian Mess): Russian Prime Minster Vladimir 'Mad Bad Vlad' Putin has planted over 1,000 rent-a-mob mercenaries to disrupt Chevron's annual stockholders' meeting in San Ramon today after a bitter decade...
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Funny story: Anger As ITV Mislead Viewers Again!

Anger As ITV Mislead Viewers Again!

ITV have today once again found themselves in hot water over claims they mislead viewers. The debacle centred around last Wednesday's supposedly live Champions League Final when in fact it was recorded 8 days ago and broadcast the next week.
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Funny story: UK sub captain 'high as a kite' on disastrous Russian Navy spying mission

UK sub captain 'high as a kite' on disastrous Russian Navy spying mission

Dead Sea - (Capt Marko Ramius Mess): The Israeli security/intelligence (sic) service has claimed that the captain of a UK submarine that crashed into a 100-tonne consignment of Russian cocaine on the Dead Sea bed was 'stoned and incapable' wh...
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Funny story: Get ready for National Stand Still Day

Get ready for National Stand Still Day

The Home Office has launched plans for a National Stand Still Day next month so it can properly count the number of foreign immigrants in the UK.
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Funny story: Gordon Brown aims to win Chelsea by-election

Gordon Brown aims to win Chelsea by-election

Prime Minister Gordon Brown believes the Labour party has a good chance of winning the job at Chelsea after the departure of Avram Grant.
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Funny story: Low fat food surplus conspiracy uncovered

Low fat food surplus conspiracy uncovered

Shoppers were dismayed to find that their favorite brands of yogurt, cheese and party dips were unavailable for days, then weeks at a time.
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Funny story: Signs of life found by Mars probe

Signs of life found by Mars probe

The Mars Phoenix lander has sent back historic pictures from the red planet that indicate life did once exist there.
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Funny story: Mugabe offers Food

Mugabe offers Food

After the recent wave of xenophobic attacks, food price riots and demonstrations in South Africa, Zimbabwean President, Robert Mugabe has come up with a novel solution.
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Funny story: Britain's Youngest Case Of Juvenile Dementia Reported

Britain's Youngest Case Of Juvenile Dementia Reported

A boy from Coventry has become the youngest-ever reported case of an affliction that is sweeping Britain, when he was diagnosed by his mum as suffering from Juvenile Dementia. Sharon Chavez, of the Burberry Estate in the city, said her 5-year-old...
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Funny story: High oil prices due to 'Magic Pixies'

High oil prices due to 'Magic Pixies'

The extraordinarily high global oil prices are the result of actions taken by Magic Pixies, Gordon Brown heard today. At a meeting with the UK's top Oil executives they explained how it wasn't their fault, Gordon Brown explained it wasn't...
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Funny story: Hull City To Become The 'New Bolton Wanderers'

Hull City To Become The 'New Bolton Wanderers'

Experts claim Premiership newboys Hull City are the 'new Bolton Wanderers' and bear all the hallmarks of the Trotters, being physical, gritty, resilient, and prone to booting the ball forward rather than pass...
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Funny story: FDA Warns Botox Causes Infection and Death

FDA Warns Botox Causes Infection and Death

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - The FDA has announced that after intensive investigations it has determined that Botox injections lead to infection and death.
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Funny story: Huge Flying Reptiles Ate Hillary

Huge Flying Reptiles Ate Hillary

With a name like T.clintonus rex, you'd expect to be safe from even the fiercest Paleolithic bullies, but it turns out that ancient, flying reptilian pundits have been snacking on Hillary, Bill and even young Chelsea Clinton with...
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Funny story: Cardiologist Sues Largest U.S. Fortune Cookie Company for Failure to Provide Fortunes!

Cardiologist Sues Largest U.S. Fortune Cookie Company for Failure to Provide Fortunes!

A San Francisco, California cardiologist is suing the major company supplying fortune cookies to 80% of the U.S. Chinese restaurants.
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Funny story: NY Times Reports: Wide Spread Interest in NCAA Women's Wrestling Federation!

NY Times Reports: Wide Spread Interest in NCAA Women's Wrestling Federation!

Just as women's sports have been declining in interest across the western world, the NY Times reports today that the CWWF, College Women's Wrestling Federation is arousing spectators.
View 'NY Times Reports: Wide Spread Interest in NCAA Women's Wrestling Federation!'
Funny story: NASA Drills on Mars!

NASA Drills on Mars!

The Bush administration has been rebuffed in its every attempt to rip into the earth and even the bottom of the sea in search of the black gold that has obsessed its every top official from W through Cheney to even former oil company legal eagle, Bus...
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Funny story: Miles and Miles of Cyrus and Enema after Enema of Emily, What! Son!!

Miles and Miles of Cyrus and Enema after Enema of Emily, What! Son!!

thespoof.com Entertainment and Gossip segment has announced its winning poem in reaction to the 2008 contributions to the column:...
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Funny story: Ronnie Love, Obama's Down Low!

Ronnie Love, Obama's Down Low!

What better handle for a Presidential Candies Back Door than Ronnie Love?...
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Funny story: Bill Clinton Sells Beer Goggles on eBay

Bill Clinton Sells Beer Goggles on eBay

Former president Bill Clinton put a few items up for sale on eBay today, including his infamous Beer Goggles. Experts say that the item will bring a huge price on the auction website due to their value to collectors.
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Funny story: Hyundai Announces Nerf Cars

Hyundai Announces Nerf Cars

Hyundai Motor America announced a breakthrough today that will promote safety and fuel economy. The Korean car maker will start selling Nerf cars in the second quarter of 2009.
View 'Hyundai Announces Nerf Cars'
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