Funny story: Beckham ordered to No 10 to explain offside rule

Beckham ordered to No 10 to explain offside rule

Drowning Street, London - (Bad Ass Mess): Ex-England football captain David Beckham was unexpectedly called in to 10 Downing Street on Tuesday night.
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Funny story: Mars Pathfinder probe seeks out signs of life on Clinton campaign trail

Mars Pathfinder probe seeks out signs of life on Clinton campaign trail

Point Conception, New Hampshire - Bill Clinton called in some old political favors and had the Jet Propulsion Laboratory (JPL) in Pasadena, California, transmit new instructions to the Pathfinder probe presently located on the surface of Mars to seek...
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Funny story: Andre lands up in playpen after tantrum

Andre lands up in playpen after tantrum

Jordan finally cracked with her spouse's childish behaviour and tantrums last week according to a reliable source.
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Funny story: Jamie Oliver gets his cock out and shows it to chicks in Snuff Movie

Jamie Oliver gets his cock out and shows it to chicks in Snuff Movie

Stud muffin super chef Jamie Oliver is to star in a controversial 'snuff' movie to be screened on Channel 4 TV this week. He is going to show people how little cocks are murdered in their shells just after they've been laid.
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Funny story: Tennis Ace Andy Murray Is Set To Have A Personality Bypass Operation

Tennis Ace Andy Murray Is Set To Have A Personality Bypass Operation

Sky News has announced that British Tennis Ace Andy Murray is likely to be out of the game for at least a month which means that he will miss the first Tennis Grand Slam of the season the Australian Open.
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Funny story: Men and Motors Channel Offers New "Ignore-Again" On Demand Player

Men and Motors Channel Offers New "Ignore-Again" On Demand Player

In line with current advances in media technology, the specialist cable channel Men and Motors is, from today, offering a new service online that allows viewers to ignore again the last 7 days of the channel's output.
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Funny story: Aggressive Australians ordered to take lessons in humility from England

Aggressive Australians ordered to take lessons in humility from England

The entire Australian cricket team has been ordered to take lessons in humility from their English counterparts in a shock ruling from the International Cricket Council.
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Funny story: For a Few Arguidos More

For a Few Arguidos More

Praia Da Iluzion - (Sad Ass Mess): This year's must-see smash-hit blockbuster movie is set to be the remake of the 1965 spaghetti western For A Few Arguidos More.
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Funny story: Jesus slams his "dead-beat dad" GOD on Rikki Lake Show

Jesus slams his "dead-beat dad" GOD on Rikki Lake Show

A pre-recorded episode of the often controversial Rikki Lake Show featuring Jesus Christ confronting God is due to air early next week.
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Funny story: Oil Prices Rise on Fears Jesus May Return!

Oil Prices Rise on Fears Jesus May Return!

Oil prices shot well over 100 dollars a barrel today on news that Jesus would return soon and that His Return would disrupt supply and distribution and create an unstable market.
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Funny story: World's Biggest TV Allows Busty British Actress To Work Again

World's Biggest TV Allows Busty British Actress To Work Again

Watching Fat Club will never be the same again after the world's biggest plasma television was unveiled yesterday. The whopping 150-inch Panasonic widescreen TV will enable viewers to watch everything in larger than life-size which is welcome rel...
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Funny story: Pentagon to replace Jesus with Thor, Zeus

Pentagon to replace Jesus with Thor, Zeus

Washington, DC - The Department of Defense is experimenting with replacing Jesus as an element of basic training in favor of more warlike deities, such as Thor and Zeus. "We have nothing against the Prince of Peace," said the religious consultant...
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Funny story: DLC Concedes Election!

DLC Concedes Election!

Washington DC - Seeking to address a growing rise in the popularity of the Democratic Party, the Democratic Leadership Council (DLC) announced today that it is conceding the 2008 election.
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Funny story: New strain Skunk cuts emissions by 2000%: study

New strain Skunk cuts emissions by 2000%: study

National Poisons Unit, Aldermaston - (Ludicrous Mess): A new strain of eco-friendly weed variant of super-strength quick-grow skunk cannabis has been found to have drastically lower CO2 emissions compared to average cannabis sativa products according...
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Funny story: A Little Late But...Happy 2008! or Happy 2008?

A Little Late But...Happy 2008! or Happy 2008?

(New York--NY) Someone asked me this New Year's Eve (Or to be accurate, I guess I should correctly say last New Year's Eve. We haven't had New Year's Eve 2008 yet.) what my resolution was? Maybe it was one too many Ketel One Koolers, but I said "not to die."...
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Funny story: More Humane Executions in Texas?

More Humane Executions in Texas?

Hanging Tree, TX (USA Today) - Based on the issues presented to the Supreme Court recently regarding the humanity of lethal injections some Texas legislators are proposing more humane forms of execution. Stating a long time, yet unwritten, policy reg...
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Funny story: Cardinal McShergar slams Obama's Irish kith and kin

Cardinal McShergar slams Obama's Irish kith and kin

County Louse, Eire - (Ludiscrous Ass Mess): Newly elevated to the Louse Archbishoprick, Cardinal Fergus McShergar has lost no time in slamming US Senator Bollox Obama's Irish cousins' gerrymandering activities for the Kleptocrat Arrivistes Ab...
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Funny story: DNA points to Dick Cheney in FBI terrorist hunt for 'DB Cooper'

DNA points to Dick Cheney in FBI terrorist hunt for 'DB Cooper'

Washington AC/DC - (Reuterus): A DNA breakthrough has led the FBI straight to Vice President Dick Cheney in the Agency's protracted investigation into the disappearance of '70s skyjacking terrorist Dan 'DB' Cooper.
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Funny story: Hollywood Internet and TV tabloids 'turn on' Dr. Phil

Hollywood Internet and TV tabloids 'turn on' Dr. Phil

Hollywood, California - Ironically the only one out of the lot in tensile town actually capable of helping Britney in her time of need of medical mental intervention, Dr. Phil has come under fire for his reaching out to Britney at Cedaer-Sinai Medica...
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Funny story: Hillary haunted by ghost of elections (erections) past

Hillary haunted by ghost of elections (erections) past

Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton struggled this morning with bags under her eyes to pour coffee and greet the day. Reporters say that the two-term New York Senator received a visit from the ghost of elections (erections) past during the night and could not get back to sleep afterwards.
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Funny story: The ABCs of the Bush years

The ABCs of the Bush years

A is for: Abramoff, autocracy, army, Afghanistan, anger, Abu Grhaib, anti-abortion, Anthrax, Armageddon, armor plate, AWOL B is...
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