Funny story: Victoria's Secret

Victoria's Secret

An unlikely double-act huddled in the corner of the post-olympic tea party reception held at the British Embassy in Beijing found Boris and Becks hatching a plan to ensure that the Brits finish on the podium of the 2012 table tennis event. David d...
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Funny story: Zookeeper Sacked For Trying To Hide In Snake

Zookeeper Sacked For Trying To Hide In Snake

A student zookeeper at a zoo in Venezuela has been sacked after he was discovered trying to hide inside a Burmese Python. Staff at the zoo, in Caracas, were alerted when they heard the man, Pedro Arteta, giggling. They pounced, and beat the snake...
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Funny story: Denver UFO rattles Obama amid paper's 'JFK Jr faked death' claims

Denver UFO rattles Obama amid paper's 'JFK Jr faked death' claims

Denver, Colorado - (Extraterrestrial Mess): A mystery UFO buzzed Denver's Pepsi Center today amid breaking headlines in a Californian celeb paper claiming John F Kennedy Junior faked his fatal 1999 airplane crash. The La FagHagSlagMag story broke...
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Funny story: New Comet Not-So-New After All

New Comet Not-So-New After All

Mount Palomar, California (IPP) - Astronomers have discovered a bright new comet which is being described as "not-so-new" after all. The comet was discovered in the constellation Ursa Major by the automated array system operating under very dark s...
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Funny story: Las Vegas Issues Odds on Hurricane Gustav

Las Vegas Issues Odds on Hurricane Gustav

Las Vegas, Nevada (IPP) - Odds makers at the Lost Wages Casino in Las Vegas are betting that New Orleans won't get it right when Hurricane Gustav, currently south of Haiti, approaches New Orleans as a category 4 or 5 hurricane in about six days. O...
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Funny story: Princess Eugenie Birthday Bash Mayhem

Princess Eugenie Birthday Bash Mayhem

Princess Eugenie, youngest daughter of Prince Andrew and the Fergie Beast, celebrated her sixteenth birthday last week with a party of such spectacular extravagance to have stirred the envy of Lucullus. The Pirates of the Caribbean theme birthday...
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Funny story: Princess Margaret's Objects de Amour Sell for a Hundred Times their Value

Princess Margaret's Objects de Amour Sell for a Hundred Times their Value

Personal items of erotica, once belonging to Princess Margaret, have already raised over £9 million on the first day of a controversial Christie's auction. Further lots owned by the Queen's late sister will be sold off by her children, Viscount Da...
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Funny story: Beijing Olympics hit by Organ Transplant Scandal

Beijing Olympics hit by Organ Transplant Scandal

The booming transplant industry involving organs harvested from executed convicts in Chinese prisons reached renewed scandalous proportions today with allegations that demand has far exceeded supply and the organs of convicted criminals are being rem...
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Funny story: Cornish Pasty Crimper

Cornish Pasty Crimper

Gary "I ain't afraid of no ghosts" Clitter, has finally found a safe haven after The Cornish Parliament gave the thumbs-up to Vietnam's favourite English Teacher and provided him a safe haven in Looe. The Stannary were apparently very pleased to h...
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Funny story: Hurricane Gustav Emits Mysterious Radio Signals

Hurricane Gustav Emits Mysterious Radio Signals

Miami, Florida (IPP) - The National Hurricane Center in Miami, Florida has received reports about a mysterious set of radio signals which seem to have originated from hurricane Gustav near Haiti. The signals were first picked up by the crew of a P...
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Funny story: Disabled Tortoise Saved from Rubbish Tip

Disabled Tortoise Saved from Rubbish Tip

A 30-year-old disabled tortoise (ingrown toenails and harelip) unwittingly sent to a landfill site with its owner's rubbish, has been found alive. Sheldrake, a greater-crested Galapagos tortoise, owned by Gladys Hawksbill of Margate in Kent, clim...
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Funny story: Obama/Biden hire UK's Neil Kinnock for top campaign plagiarism post

Obama/Biden hire UK's Neil Kinnock for top campaign plagiarism post

Denver, Colorado Beetle - (Up Yer Arse Mess): Former UK Labour Party gingernut tosser Neil Kinnock has been hired by US presidential wannabes Barrack Obama and Joe Biden to plagiarise for them ahead of their November 2008 dreamticket campaign. Kin...
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Funny story: Ant and Dec to Interview Royal Princes

Ant and Dec to Interview Royal Princes

It was announced by Clarence House this week that as part of the 30th anniversary celebrations for The Prince's Trust, HRH Prince Charles, and sons Wills and Harry (aka the Ginger Minger), will demean their Royal dignity to a fresh low in being inter...
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Funny story: Biden's got B.O.

Biden's got B.O.

Denver, Colorado - (Fetid Ass Mess): "The whole thing stinks to high heaven of yet another Ratzinger alien implant," Dave Skank, political editor of LA FagHagSlagMag, said today as Barack 'B.O.' Obama schmoozed his Opus Dei Veep in front of a credul...
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Funny story: North Atlantic Island Republic Defies IAEA Ruling

North Atlantic Island Republic Defies IAEA Ruling

The sacred islet of Rockall this week stands embroiled in a diplomatic row with the International Atomic Energy Agency over its refusal to cease enrichment of fissionable fuel for the Hall's Ledge nuclear power station reactor. The IAEA claim the...
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Funny story: Malaysian Man Deep Tongues King Cobra

Malaysian Man Deep Tongues King Cobra

Abdul Shahimi Stupidtwat, a Malaysian reptile halitosis consultant, set a new Guinness World Record today for kissing a poisonous snake 51 times in three minutes. The bizarre event, sponsored by Barmy Bastard Productions and Ripley's Believe It Or...
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Funny story: Black Child Cast as Monkey in School Play

Black Child Cast as Monkey in School Play

A seven-year-old boy with a highly developed sun tan has been withdrawn from a school play by his mother after he was cast as a monkey. Mrs. Lorraine Kong took her son, King, out of a junior stage production of the 2001 hit movie Planet of the Ape...
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Funny story: Download-only songs now being sold in record shops

Download-only songs now being sold in record shops

A download-only song from American rapper Bledd E Noize is being sold openly in shops across London, it was revealed today. The song, "Killing me softly with his Uzi ", despite being released in an exclusive MP3, download-only format, is now being...
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Funny story: Acorah - "Diana Told Me to Slap Fayed"

Acorah - "Diana Told Me to Slap Fayed"

Only days after returning to London following his assault on royal arse-licker Paul Burrell with a gateau worth $5,000, camp celebrity mystic Derek Acorah, who is often grammatically incorrect, has been at it again - this time in London. In sensa...
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Funny story: No Frills, No Air

No Frills, No Air

Cheapskate airline, Ryan NO Air deprived 168 passengers of oxygen today. The flight plunged to 8,000ft AND because passengers hadn't paid an oxygen supplement Ryan Scare boss; Paddy O'Sleasy ordered crew to cut the emergency air supply. A spoke...
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Funny story: Bush Passes Mantle to McCain in lead-up to White House race

Bush Passes Mantle to McCain in lead-up to White House race

US President George W. Bush threw his full support behind Republican White House candidate John McCain yesterday, saying he was prepared to pass the presidential baton to the veteran senator from Arizona. "I believe that Senator McCain is ready to t...
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Funny story: 2012 Olympic foreign athletics are learning to speak Urdu, not English

2012 Olympic foreign athletics are learning to speak Urdu, not English

Many foreign athletics are now preparing for the 2012 Olympics to be held in London by learning Urdu, and surprisingly not English. Urdu language classes are becoming increasingly popular and are springing up from China to Paraguay as foreign ath...
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Funny story: George Michael "Cocks Up" in Manchester

George Michael "Cocks Up" in Manchester

In the latest embarrassing chapter in the saga of George Michael's dropped bollocks, the swarthy '80s popster reportedly forgot that he was supposed to be performing at his farewell concert at London's Earls Court on Sunday and had to be dragged from...
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Funny story: Fox News reporter scalped by phony Indian at Democratic Convention protest

Fox News reporter scalped by phony Indian at Democratic Convention protest

Fox News reporter, Griff Jenkins, who was covering protests at the 2008 Democratic Convention, who had disappeared early that day was found this evening wandering aimlessly around the streets of Denver wearing only underwear and completely scalped.
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Funny story: Director of BAA admits it was all a mistake

Director of BAA admits it was all a mistake

The Director of BAA, the British Airports Authority, Mr Peter Flypast, has admitted that his company's ownership of several British airports including Heathrow, Gatwick and Edinburgh was all a big mistake. He said: "My wife, Mrs Flypast and I, wer...
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Funny story: John McCain Chooses Bigfoot As Running Mate

John McCain Chooses Bigfoot As Running Mate

Aug. 25, 2008 - In an attempt to deflect American voters' attention from the Democratic Party Convention, John McCain today announced his Vice Presidential running mate. With Barack Obama having named Joseph Biden two days ago, McCain named Bigfoot,...
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Funny story: Bigfoot Sighted in Wales

Bigfoot Sighted in Wales

Cardiff Wales - A rare UK sasquatch sighting reported in Cardiff has been called a hoax by local citizens. Sensitive to the famous Cardiff Giant hoax of the past century the report was immediately investigated and debunked. The reported sighing of...
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Funny story: Jack Daniels to Reissue Tee-Shirt to Identify Assholes

Jack Daniels to Reissue Tee-Shirt to Identify Assholes

Lynchburg Tennessee - Distiller Jack Daniels, under pressure from Conservative spokesman Rush Limbaugh, have agreed to reissue their famous traditional black Tee-shirt popularly worn by assholes until recently. Limbaugh and his right leaning group...
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