Funny story: Tube Suicide Bomb Man Jailed, or even Gaoled

Tube Suicide Bomb Man Jailed, or even Gaoled

A civil servant who claimed to be a drunken Muslim Scottish suicide bomber has been jailed.
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Funny story: Research reveals that 4% of Radio 1 listeners are totally deaf

Research reveals that 4% of Radio 1 listeners are totally deaf

Research has revealed that 4% of Radio 1's current listeners are totally deaf, while the other 96% are completely tone deaf.
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Funny story: David Blaine holds in his own ego on Oprah

David Blaine holds in his own ego on Oprah

Delusionist David Blaine, held his ego in check for a full seventeen minutes 4 seconds on the Oprah Winfrey show today.
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Funny story: Major Breakthrough in Pathology

Major Breakthrough in Pathology

SKOKIE, Illinois (AP) -- Scientists at Devonshire Elementary rejoiced today as newly discovered evidence pointed the way to a stunning pathological breakthrough. According to new research, the debilitating disease known as "Cooties" is now...
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Funny story: Story of Austrian man keeping daughter in cellar for 24 years reminds Vermont women to take muffins out of the oven.

Story of Austrian man keeping daughter in cellar for 24 years reminds Vermont women to take muffins out of the oven.

Cynthia Palmer, a stay at home mother from Vermont, was watching the television on Monday. She was watching the emerging story of the Austrian abuse scandal, which reminded her the she had left her blueberry muffins in the oven.
View 'Story of Austrian man keeping daughter in cellar for 24 years reminds Vermont women to take muffins out of the oven.'
Funny story: Drunken Mongolian Christmas party reveals eggnog to be a yak aphrodisiac.

Drunken Mongolian Christmas party reveals eggnog to be a yak aphrodisiac.

Feeding a yak eggnog has found to result in an almost immediate raging erection.
View 'Drunken Mongolian Christmas party reveals eggnog to be a yak aphrodisiac.'
Funny story: Aliens Finally Find What They're Looking For In Man's Anus

Aliens Finally Find What They're Looking For In Man's Anus

LOUISVILLE - Aliens from another galaxy announced today that they had finally found what they had been seeking for the last fifty years of human history.
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Funny story: Lesbos rejects lesbians, especially Rosie O'Donnell

Lesbos rejects lesbians, especially Rosie O'Donnell

A Greek court has been asked to draw the line between numerous annoying gay women on television and the natives of the Aegean Sea island of Lesbos.
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Funny story: Shares in Sharing Drop

Shares in Sharing Drop

The once popular business of sharing has met with stiff opposition from greedy bastards and is seriously in decline.
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Funny story: Myspace registration mandatory for Utah residents by 2011

Myspace registration mandatory for Utah residents by 2011

In what is sure to become a controversial new bill, the Utah State Senate passed a bill last Thursday requiring MySpace registration for all Utah residents by 2011. The bill is a sweeping attempt at cracking down on counterfeit driver's licenses...
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Funny story: New AA program encourages drinking to curtail sagging AA memberships

New AA program encourages drinking to curtail sagging AA memberships

Alcoholics Anonymous, the rehabilitation program founding in the 1930's to aid those with alcoholism, began testing an outreach pilot program this month to curb sagging membership rates.
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Funny story: Las Vegas loses title of 'Sin City' to West Jordan, Utah

Las Vegas loses title of 'Sin City' to West Jordan, Utah

It turns out that tourists heading to Las Vegas in search of a riotous and 'sinful' vacation may actually find better luck in Nevada's eastern neighbor.
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Funny story: Pizza Shed To Introduce New "Lard Lovers" Pizza

Pizza Shed To Introduce New "Lard Lovers" Pizza

Kokomo, Indiana - Lovers of Pizza Shed pizza were thrilled today when it was announced that the corporation would be introducing its new "Lard Lovers" pizza sometime in May.
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Funny story: Pregnant polygamy girls' ultrasounds show images of Jesus

Pregnant polygamy girls' ultrasounds show images of Jesus

Eldorado, Texas - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): One hundred pregnant under-eighteen year-olds taken from the Yearning For Zion polygamy nutters' hellhole have stunned doctors after ultrasound scans showed images of Jesus in their wombs.
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Funny story: Daniel Radcliffe Demands A Recount

Daniel Radcliffe Demands A Recount

The 2008 Rich List put Harry Potter star Daniel Radcliffe as the richest kid under 30 in the UK, and the 33rd richest in the world. But this was not good enough for good old Radders, and in a violent outburst Daniel asked for a recount.
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Funny story: McCain Health Plan: Walk It Off, Buddy!

McCain Health Plan: Walk It Off, Buddy!

Bethesda, MD - Republican Presidential Candidate Doctor John Sidney McCain announced his health care plan today.
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Funny story: Jeremiah Wright Speaks Out About Miley Cyrus

Jeremiah Wright Speaks Out About Miley Cyrus

The Reverend Jeremiah Wright spoke out again Tuesday night, this time on a different subject - Miley Cyrus. Wright said that there's nothing wrong with a young woman expressing herself in that manner, and that it's natural for men to find the...
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Funny story: Missing Brazilian balloonist padre spotted straddling Pink Floyd flying pig

Missing Brazilian balloonist padre spotted straddling Pink Floyd flying pig

Los Angeles, California - (Pigs Might Fly Mess): Missing Brazilian balloonist priest Reverend Adelir Antonio de Carli has been spotted straddling an errant 200ft giant inflatable rubber pig that managed to leg it from a Pink Floyd session at the Coac...
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Funny story: Eliot Spitzer hooker agency nets Brazilian footballer Ronaldo

Eliot Spitzer hooker agency nets Brazilian footballer Ronaldo

Rio De Janeiro, Brazil - (Reuterus & Ass Mess): NYPD investigators are cock-a-hoop after a sting op in the Eliot Spitzer hooker agency probe netted Brazilian footballer and AC/DC Milan star striker Ronaldo.
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Funny story: British Anagram Society is Extremely 'On A Deny' (Annoyed)

British Anagram Society is Extremely 'On A Deny' (Annoyed)

The British Anagram Society today issued a tumult aim (ultimatum) to the country's sorted stress crow (crossword setters) to stop taking anagrams so cop yell met (completely) for granted.
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Funny story: Disneyland Coming to Baghdad, To Offer Exciting Rides and Shooting Galleries

Disneyland Coming to Baghdad, To Offer Exciting Rides and Shooting Galleries

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) -- Disneyland will be coming to Baghdad soon, offering visitors a multi-million dollar entertainment complex on a 50 acre lot adjacent to the Green Zone.
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Funny story: Teen remanded over terrier charges

Teen remanded over terrier charges

An administrative cock-up by the West Yorkshire Police Force has led to the arrest of 19 year old Kenzie Mahoodie. The youth, who currently lives in Desbury, was arrested and later released on suspicion of possessing a Jack Russell, with explosive t...
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Funny story: Boy Loses Bus Ticket, Has To Walk Home

Boy Loses Bus Ticket, Has To Walk Home

A teenager who lost his bus ticket has had to walk home from a night out, and was nearly the victim of an unprovoked attack by a drunken mob of slags, according to reports.
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Funny story: 'Save the vultures' centres to breed drug-free lawyers

'Save the vultures' centres to breed drug-free lawyers

Vultures could be extinct in the wild within 10 years unless a drug blamed for their rapid demise is eliminated, scientists warn.
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Funny story: First ever speed camera that attempts to actually reduce speed is to be installed outside Leeds

First ever speed camera that attempts to actually reduce speed is to be installed outside Leeds

In what is seen as a revolutionary breakthrough by any council in the country, Leeds is to install a road-side speed camera in an attempt to actually reduce drivers' speed at an accident blackspot outside the city.
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Funny story: Condoleeza Rice Gives Bizarre News Conference

Condoleeza Rice Gives Bizarre News Conference

(Washington DC) Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice is perceived both inside and outside the Bush Administration as smart, savvy and sober. Those perceptions may change after a bizarre news conference she gave yesterday to reporters in front of the Wh...
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Funny story: Manchester City Opt For Jack Duckworth

Manchester City Opt For Jack Duckworth

Manchester City owner Thaksin Shinawatra has told fans that the days of the Sky Blues' team manager Sven Goran Erikkson are numbered at Maine Road, and that the man to replace him will be none ot...
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Funny story: Prince William's World (at War) Tour 2008

Prince William's World (at War) Tour 2008

Following his whirlwind helicopter tour of the UK, the media proclaimed 'Prince of Hearts' has decided to boost the morale of the troops by paying them a flying visit. The granny's favourite is going to fly past the Armed Forces camp in...
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Funny story: EEC extends "sell-by date" rules to non food items

EEC extends "sell-by date" rules to non food items

In a dramatic move aimed at harmonising sell-by and use-by dates on products other than food, the mandarins (sadly no use-by date on these particular fruits) of Brussels have imposed rules to cover an extended range of non-food products.
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Funny story: Great Britain's Princess Di Wakes up in the Shower Realizing the Last Ten Years was a Dream!

Great Britain's Princess Di Wakes up in the Shower Realizing the Last Ten Years was a Dream!

Much like that heralded American Television Program of years past, "Dallas", where one of the lead characters woke up in the shower and realized that he had dreamed the whole previous season, Great Britain's Princess Diana woke up in th...
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Funny story: Bush invokes God, sprinkles holy water on journalists who say 'recession'

Bush invokes God, sprinkles holy water on journalists who say 'recession'

With consumer confidence slipping and gasoline prices soaring, President Bush delivered an unusually dark assessment of the economy at yesterday's Rose Garden press conference, saying the nation was in "very difficult times, very di...
View 'Bush invokes God, sprinkles holy water on journalists who say 'recession''
Funny story: Man dies from South Park

Man dies from South Park

A man who was found in his apartment by a neighbour, had died of malnutrition. He sat atrophied, limbs hanging, eyes staring forward in death.
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Funny story: Dear Paraphernalia4Your Genitalia

Dear Paraphernalia4Your Genitalia

Dear P4YG, My husband and I, both devout Roman Catholics, recently read about a Catholic Kama Sutra. Is there such a thing? What do you know about it? Will it be going to press soon? Will there be a DVD?! Please answer really soon! Breathless in Brestlova...
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Funny story: Bu$h Can't Use Magic Wand

Bu$h Can't Use Magic Wand

In a very narrow-ranging news conference Tuesday, Pres. George W. Bu$h stated ". . . if there was a magic wand to wave, I'd be waving it, of course."...
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Funny story: Clinton Names Rev Wrighteous Her Very Own VIP!

Clinton Names Rev Wrighteous Her Very Own VIP!

Hillary Clinton, wife and first Lady to first Black President WJC, has shocked the party officials by naming a VIP before receiving the Democratic nomination for Presidential candidacy.
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Funny story: President Raps: "It's Hard Out There fo a Hoe Bush!"

President Raps: "It's Hard Out There fo a Hoe Bush!"

Worst Prez Eva, Hoemasta GWB has released a new album with the hit release: "It's Hard Out There fo a Hoe Bush!"...
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Funny story: China set to Execute its Executioners

China set to Execute its Executioners

GUANGZHOU, CHINA - In an effort to bolster its abysmal human rights record and clean up its image, China is set to put more than 200 of its executioners to death.
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Funny story: Hezbolla-Poppin Best Musical Comedy of 2008

Hezbolla-Poppin Best Musical Comedy of 2008

Former Shia guerrilla leader turned impresario Fade Fayed proudly raised his Tony award over his head and playfully aped happy shooting motions at the annual awards ceremony held last week in New York.
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Funny story: Mugabe: 'Let's do a best-of-seven like the NHL does.'

Mugabe: 'Let's do a best-of-seven like the NHL does.'

President Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe has asked his opposition in last months elections to consider a best-of-seven elections format to determine the African nation's next president.
View 'Mugabe: 'Let's do a best-of-seven like the NHL does.''
Funny story: Old Staples store to be razed by giant staple remover

Old Staples store to be razed by giant staple remover

The Staples Superstore in Cherry Hill, New Jersey recently relocated to a newer, larger store several miles down Route 73. The company claimed that the original site was much too small for the booming national office supply retailer.
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Funny story: Seemingly Unsinkable Obama Brown Broadsided by Jeremiad I.R. Wrighteous

Seemingly Unsinkable Obama Brown Broadsided by Jeremiad I.R. Wrighteous

Just when Barack thought it was safe to go back into the political waters, his spiritual leader and life guide, Jeremiad I.R. Wrighteous has released non-stop repeated 40 oz cans of malt whoop ass in four feverinos exemplifying the very intemperate r...
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Funny story: Kate Smith Rises from the Dead to Honor America!

Kate Smith Rises from the Dead to Honor America!

Yankee Stadium became the new Easter Garden as Kate Smith rose from the dead to sing God Bless America in honor of the poor souls who have been sent to their death by chicken hawks Bush, Cheney et al.
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Funny story: Steingrabber Conjoined Twins and Their Children's Crusade

Steingrabber Conjoined Twins and Their Children's Crusade

Hank and Hal the Steingrabber conjoined twins have been trying to launch the latest New York Yankee World Series effort like the desperate war wagers of the past.
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Funny story: Ad Agency Arrested By Portuguese Police

Ad Agency Arrested By Portuguese Police

The entire worldwide staff of advertising agency McCann Erickson has sensationally been arrested in dawn raids by elite Portuguese Special Forces following an anonymous tip-off by seven pissed journalists in a Praia da Luz tapas bar.
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Funny story: William Takes Flying Trip to Afghanistan

William Takes Flying Trip to Afghanistan

Prince William today visited lots of battle-hardened British soldiers in Afghanistan today, and instantly had their respect and loyalty.
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