Washington Toast - The war in Iraq has ended! This was sooner than expected due to events traced back to the fall of the Ottoman empire.
(Washington) - In a political effort to gain more power and buy more votes, politicians in Washington have proposed a 3-day workweek for all U.S. employees.
A noted Washington think tank, The Center for Human Beings, released a study recently which declared that Europeans are better than Americans.
Moscow (IP) - The Russian government has announced that they will turn the moon into a giant Sputnik in the greatest work of art ever attempted by man.
New York, New York - Yoko Ono, widow of slain Beatle John Lennon, claimed today that "my John" had forseen global warming.
Cape Canaveral, Florida (IP) - Space scientists were astounded today when the Pluto bound New Horizons space craft sent photos back to Earth of satellites orbiting the other planets that had been sent aloft by Haiti.
The Sporting Spoof tipster, 'the Macster', has been adopted by the England Rugby Team as their lucky mascot following pre-match assessments of their quarter-final and semi-final battles against much...
A study at the University of Springfield at Piermont (USAP) has conclusively shown that acupuncture can help the dead every bit as much as it does the living.
Washington, DC -- President George Bush met with reporters today to clear the air about his confusing military past.
The ongoing debate over global warming came to an unexpected and shocking end today.
Northern Rock chairman Matt Ridley has mysteriously stepped down from his job, sources at the beleaguered bank have announced. He cleared his desk this afternoon, and resigned with immediate effect.
Unable to outdo one another in terms of religious devotion in their individual appearances on the campaign trail, the major candidates of both parties will be coming together next month for an unprecedented piousness debate, or God-off.
Bloodyvostock - (Ass Messki): Russian President Vladimir Sputum has accused the US of harbouring "erotic" desires to penetrate him.
Washington D.C. -- The United States Bureau of Commerce released 2005 GDP figures today revealing the highs and lows of today's volatile economy.
Paris, France - (Fly Half Mess): The Puppet Monarch sealed the England team's Rugby World Cup fate with a hand- written Kiss of Death note which Princess Anus will hand over to Johnny Wilkinson just minutes before kick-off.
London - (Reuterus & Ass mess): George W Bush has been hiding something disgusting in London for the last 20 years according to Whitehall security/intelligence chiefs.
Old Bailey, London - (Ass Mess): Five boys convicted of killing a harmless middle aged man by pelting him with stones and rocks while he played cricket on the village green have been sentenced to two years exile in Iran.
Not Duff, she's alright, the other one - Clinton. The wife of former president William Clinton is presently on the rampage across the US in pursuit of becoming the first female Commander in Chief. Fair play to her I say but American voters should really consider basically telling her to piss off for the following reasons.
Presenter Jonathan Ross did the honourable thing today Friday 19th October 2007 by resigning and saving 2,500 jobs which where under threat at the BBC.
WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) -- Republican Presidential candidate Ron Paul is now the top candidate running for president and is headed for the GOP nomination, both CNN and Fox have finally admitted.
One of the world's leading scientists was entangled in a furious row last night after he claimed that Jews were more intelligent than the rest of us.
The former Lib-Dem leader has been called out of retirement after just one day to serve his country once more. It is hoped that he will make a better trainer than he was politician.
London, England -- Gary Numan was seen hanging around a local electronics store today, for what purpose few seem to know, including the shop owner.
"Well, I recognised him right away," stated storeowner, Tony Mason. "I know it's strange, but wh...
Boston, Massachusetts -- A surprising discovery into Mitt Romney's apparent flip-flop on various issues was made public despite Romney's protestations today. The shocking report revealed that the Romney campaign relies heavily on a cheap, albeit gol...
California (mn) - After hours trading on Google (GOOG) drove the shares of the Internet search firm up nearly 20% to $761.82. That's $123.19 change since markets closed this afternoon. The spike was driven on the late announcement of Google'...
New York (mn) - Marvel Comics announced this week that Captain America would be reborn with issue #34, just nine issues after the Sentinel of Libery was shot dead on court house steps in issue #25.
A forensic scientist studying the DNA of water in the English University of Cambridge has made some startling findings that may cause us to think twice before ever drinking tap water again.
An administrator at Mayberry Middle School was reported today with a strange growth on her face. Assistant Principal (AP) Dolly Testamilion was first reported to have a clef on her lip, but a closer look revealed something quite different.
New York, New York (IP) - Manager Joe Torres turned down an offer from the Yankees to work for another year.
Washington, D.C. -- The federal government released the results of an eight-month study into the digestibility of candy corn today.
Following recent reports of squirrels in the East End of London, forming together into collective farms, harvesting crops and exporting snails to France, animal experts are reporting an incredible development among the local crow population.
Migrant workers last year earned higher wages than their British counterparts, worked harder, offered much-needed skills, paid more in taxes than they used in public services, and contributed £10 billion to the nation's economic growth, a Home Of...