Funny story: Suspicious Odor Clears Capitol Building

Suspicious Odor Clears Capitol Building

WASHINGTON - The Capitol Building was evacuated Friday due to a "suspicious odor." Capitol police made the decision to "scram" the building at 10:15 AM after many so-called important people within the Capitol complained of a "...
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Funny story: Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan, Partners in Nicole Richie's Driving School

Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan, Partners in Nicole Richie's Driving School

Nicole Richie opened a driving school in response to driving north in the south bound traffic lanes of a Los Angeles freeway a few moths ago. Ms Richie had a rathe...
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Funny story: Uncle Sam Declares Tuesday Public Holiday -- Paris Release

Uncle Sam Declares Tuesday Public Holiday -- Paris Release

Paris Hilton will be released from jail next Tuesday, June 26, Sheriff's spokesman Doc Holiday announced today.
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Funny story: CIA's finest moments to be revealed

CIA's finest moments to be revealed

Washington DC - (Ass Mess): Sixty years of declassified CIA secrets will be revealed next week when the US spying agency pulls the wraps off its finest hours.
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Funny story: Paris Hilton announces new television series

Paris Hilton announces new television series

(Los Angeles, CA) Media whore Paris Hilton has announced her upcoming reality series "Bitches Behind Bars" to air on the FOX channel this Fall.
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Funny story: David Beckham scraps L.A deal and is on his way to Bolton!

David Beckham scraps L.A deal and is on his way to Bolton!

David Beckham is not going to L.A galaxy! In an exclusive interview with TheSpoof.com, Becks' agent told us he will instead be going to Bolton Wanderers FC, that the contract has been signed and every thing is in place.
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Funny story: Glastonbury downpour "first decent wash of the year for many"

Glastonbury downpour "first decent wash of the year for many"

Glastonbury - (Fragrant Press): Organisers of this year's Glastonbury Festival have said the relentless downpours have been a huge blessing in disguise and probably the closest that the majority of the 180,000 scrofulous long-haired hippies have...
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Funny story: Yahoo signs six Asians for mobile search

Yahoo signs six Asians for mobile search

Six mobile phone street urchins in Asia have agreed to use Yahoo's oneSearch mobile search engine.
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Funny story: Doctor Fanny and Britney's vagina

Doctor Fanny and Britney's vagina

Top gynaecologist Dr Fanny Hole has hit out at the ignorance shown by the critics of Britney Spears's 'vagina' pictures.
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Funny story: Idaho racist convention set to get underway

Idaho racist convention set to get underway

(Boise, ID) Hotels are anxiously preparing for the upcoming Arian Nation National Convention next month. Restaurants and retail stores are also gearing up with specials and new window displays.
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Funny story: Iran's Amadinejad Makes Nice To U.S.

Iran's Amadinejad Makes Nice To U.S.

(Tehran) - Anti-American radical Iranian president, Mahmoud Amadinejad, narrowly escaped serious injury yesterday when a launched U.S. made missile flew off course in Iraq, entered Iran, cruised through downtown Tehran, and flew right through Amadine...
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Funny story: Chastity Ring Teen promotes Chastity Belt

Chastity Ring Teen promotes Chastity Belt

A GIRL of 16, fighting a ban that forbids her from wearing a ring to school that symbolizes her commitment to chastity, has now withdrawn her High Court action after criticisms that the legal action is an wasteful challenge to human rights legislatio...
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Funny story: Blackstone Goes Public

Blackstone Goes Public

The private equity firm Blackstone has now gone public for 41 billion. With the movie Evan Almighty a disappointment at the box office on Friday, Americans had little else to do but bid up the price of Blackstone from 31 to 35 dollars.
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Funny story: Lachapelle stunned at Love's possible admission of guilt

Lachapelle stunned at Love's possible admission of guilt

At a recent Hollywood soiree, Courtney Love became the subject for a stage hypnotist. Love barked like a dog and danced a tasteful striptease, according to boyfriend David Lachapelle.
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Funny story: Mardi Gras legislation to enforce curfew for youth

Mardi Gras legislation to enforce curfew for youth

(New Orleans, LA) Mardi Gras has a long, rich history of being a celebration of hedonism. Unfortunately, one tradition has caused many headaches for police: flashing for beads.
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Funny story: Columbo New Tory Leader

Columbo New Tory Leader

In a shock move towards 'justice and fairness', the Conservatives have thrown out David Cameron and replaced him with the television detective Columbo. Mr Columbo takes over immediately, with Cameron taking over at the Department Of The North...
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Funny story: Tony Blair Appointment As Palestinian Envoy

Tony Blair Appointment As Palestinian Envoy

Washington Toast - Partnered with starting a war on false information a few miles away, and managing to turn that area of the world into a tinder box, George Bush is making plans to appoint good friend Tony Blair special envoy to oversee Palestinian...
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Funny story: Paris Hilton dating Ron Paul. Offered VP on Republican Ticket

Paris Hilton dating Ron Paul. Offered VP on Republican Ticket

Paris Hilton wants to be President of the United States of America. In an exclusive interview with this reporter yesterday in her scum-sucking putrid rat-infested jail cell, Paris was blunt: "Being President? Hot!"...
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Funny story: Man on Street refuses to join Brown's Cabinet

Man on Street refuses to join Brown's Cabinet

A man on the street told our reporter that he had refused to join Prime Minister in Waiting Gordon Brown's Cabinet.
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Funny story: Venezuela Praises U.S.A.

Venezuela Praises U.S.A.

(Caracus) - Venezuelan dictator, Hugo Chavez, changed his anti-American tune yesterday when a U.S. made missile was accidentally launched through his presidential bathroom window.
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Funny story: Bush Defecates on Constitution in Disturbing Late-night Ceremony

Bush Defecates on Constitution in Disturbing Late-night Ceremony

WASHINGTON - "Disturbing" is the best word this reporter can use to describe the incidents that took place at the White House over the Memorial Day weekend.
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Funny story: Nazi movie will end Cruise's career

Nazi movie will end Cruise's career

Hollywood - (Ass Mess): Tom Cruise has been warned that the $200 million he's borrowed from Merrill Lynch to make the Nazi movie "Valkyrie" for United Artists will end his career and personally bankrupt him.
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Funny story: Minister of Spiritual Inner Awareness bats for Paris & Nicole

Minister of Spiritual Inner Awareness bats for Paris & Nicole

Sally Kirkland, (63) American actress, nominated for the Academy Award for Best Actress in 1987 for Anna, has led a 'Free Paris' protest with six supporters outside of Lynwood jail. As a minister in the Church of The Movement of Spiritual Inner Awareness she also prayed for Nicole Richie.
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Funny story: Lewis Hamilton Wins Again

Lewis Hamilton Wins Again

Formula One sensation Lewis Hamilton has won again - this time at Royal Ascot.
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Funny story: No UK Papal visit for Ratzinger until God's Banker assassin behind bars

No UK Papal visit for Ratzinger until God's Banker assassin behind bars

Vatican - (Ass mess): "Holy Father we are completely and utterly f***ed," UK Prime Monster Tony Blair told the Pope today at his meeting at the Vatican.
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Funny story: Paris Hilton To Become Nun

Paris Hilton To Become Nun

(Los Angeles) - After a brief meeting with the pope, Hilton heiress Paris will shed her party girl image and become a nun.
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Funny story: Spice Girls reunion tour

Spice Girls reunion tour

The former girl group, the Spice Girls, have unfortunately been tempted out of retirement by the promise of £10 million each for a 25-date 'farewell' tour.
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Funny story: Millennium Dome To Reopen In Bid To Curb Smokers' Angst

Millennium Dome To Reopen In Bid To Curb Smokers' Angst

The Millennium Dome, the 'blot on the landscape' of the Greenwich peninsula, and the subject of many a 'bar room titter', has been earmarked for reopening on the eve of the Public Smoking Ban
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Funny story: Blair caves in to EU

Blair caves in to EU

Soon-to-be ex-Prime Minister, Tony Blair, has signed away the rights to his wife Cherie at the recent EU summit in Brussels.
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Funny story: Big Brother Seany Leaves In A Flood Of Tears

Big Brother Seany Leaves In A Flood Of Tears

Irishman Seany O'Kane last night became the second housemate to be evicted by the general public from Channel 4's Big Brother show.
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Funny story: QPR Congratulated In Chinese Takeaway Promotion Match Debacle

QPR Congratulated In Chinese Takeaway Promotion Match Debacle

Queens Park Rangers have been commended by the Football Association after exercising "considerable restraint" after enduring extreme intimidation during their 'friendly' match against the Ch...
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Funny story: Blair to convert to Islam

Blair to convert to Islam

Prime Minister Tony Blair is to convert to Islam once he leaves office, it has been announced. A spokesman said "Tony has always been interested in Islam and has many Moslem friends in other countries, such as President Mubarak of Egypt and more...
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Funny story: DVLA Allows Proxies To Take Driving Tests

DVLA Allows Proxies To Take Driving Tests

In light of the revelations today by The Driving Standards Agency (DSA) which says that tens of thousands of people are paying fraudsters to sit their driving test for them, the DVLA has introduced measures to allow "proxies" to take incomp...
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Funny story: Rick Hilton Buys LA Correctional Institute

Rick Hilton Buys LA Correctional Institute

According to knowledgeable insiders, Rick Hilton, grandson of famous hotelier Conrad Hilton and father of Paris Hilton, today closed a rush real estate deal that makes him sole owner of the LA Century Regional Detention Facility.
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Funny story: Canada to Build Fence Across Its Southern Border

Canada to Build Fence Across Its Southern Border

Due to the skyrocketing cost of healthcare, 46 million US citizens, who have no health insurance, are facing bankruptcy, destitution, and premature death. Now, thousands of desperate US citizens have begun sneaking over the border to take advantage...
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Funny story: Moro Islamic Liberation Front (MILF) decide to change name

Moro Islamic Liberation Front (MILF) decide to change name

Southern Philippines (Reuterus) - The Moro Islamic Liberation Front (or MILF), a Muslim separatist rebel group and breakaway faction of the Moro National Liberation Front (or MNLF), has voted to change their name.
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Funny story: Where do pens come from?

Where do pens come from?

I just checked my desk drawer. I must have over a hundred pens in there. They seem to proliferate. Sometimes I think they actually breed! Every time I turn around I have a new pen in my pocket. The odd thing is -- I haven't actually bought one in at least 20 years!...
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Funny story: Shevchenko Transfer Confirmed

Shevchenko Transfer Confirmed

Revealing the worst kept secret in world football, Chelsea this morning announced Andriy Shevchenko would not be returning to Stamford Bridge for the coming season, to be replaced by a shock signing from Asia. The surprising part of the deal is that...
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Funny story: Christensen or Depp to portray ghost of INXS lead singer Hutchence

Christensen or Depp to portray ghost of INXS lead singer Hutchence

HOLLYWOOD - The ghost of Mike L. Hutchence will reportedly be played by Hayd N. Christensen or John E. Depp in a rumored new film produced by Morg N. Freeman.
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Funny story: UNMOVIC move to disband

UNMOVIC move to disband

NEW YORK (WTF News) - The United Nations Monitoring, Verification and Inspection Commission (UNMOVIC for short), whose mandate was to disarm Iraq of its weapons of mass destruction, has officially been recommended by UK/US authorities to stand-down f...
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Funny story: Glastonbury Touts Make Record Profits

Glastonbury Touts Make Record Profits

Despite the efforts of festival organisers to stamp out the practise, Glastonbury has once again been a profitable weekend for the touts, with The Who and Girls Aloud among the worst hit.
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Funny story: Test-fest Plans Nixed

Test-fest Plans Nixed

Black Rock Desert - By order of the Commissioner of Major League Baseball ("Bud" Selig) the First Annual 'Burning Manhood' festival has been turned off as quickly as it was turned on.
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Funny story: Golf Ball Poaching on the Rise

Golf Ball Poaching on the Rise

THAILAND (UPI) - Recent statistics show that golf driving ranges and hazards provide good cover for a rapidly-growing problem known as golf ball poaching.
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Funny story: Canadian Pork Processing Plant Shutdowns Lead to Braunschweiger Shortage

Canadian Pork Processing Plant Shutdowns Lead to Braunschweiger Shortage

LOS ANGELES - Unseasonably high Braunschweiger prices throughout the region are being blamed on unexpected Canadian pork processors shutting down their plants for extended maintenance.
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Funny story: Potential Murderer Released Early

Potential Murderer Released Early

In an unprecented move, outgoing Home Secretary John Reid has granted early release to potential murderer Albert Toshack, 4, from Wirral.
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Funny story: John McCain Terrified of Ron Paul!

John McCain Terrified of Ron Paul!

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Iowa - John McCain is so terrified of Ron Paul that his senior adviser on the McCain Campaign in Iowa, Ed Failor Jr, excluded Ron Paul from the Iowa debates.
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