Funny story: Ex-fiance Paris Latsis asks for Hilton visitation order

Ex-fiance Paris Latsis asks for Hilton visitation order

Los Angeles - (Ass Mess): Greek shipping heir and former Paris Hilton fiance Paris Latsis is reported to have made an official request to visit his former betrothed in LA's Twin Towers jail just as soon as shrinks sign her off as stable enough to...
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Funny story: Paris toilet phobia blamed on swallowed stash

Paris toilet phobia blamed on swallowed stash

Twin Towers Jail, Los Angeles - (Ass Mess): Doctors monitoring incarcerated socialite Paris Hilton are investigating reports that her refusal to eat, drink or use the lavatory for five days is unconnected to any eating disorder or hygiene phobia but...
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Funny story: L.A. County Sherrif Defies Bush Order To Release Hilton

L.A. County Sherrif Defies Bush Order To Release Hilton

Los Angeles County Sheriff Andy Griffith has announced that he will defy President Bush's pardon of Paris Hilton.
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Funny story: Paris Hilton Says "I'm Learning And Growing" in Prison Statement

Paris Hilton Says "I'm Learning And Growing" in Prison Statement

In a statement released from the Los Angeles twin towers prison, Paris Hilton said that she is "learning and growing." She also said that she has decided not to appeal her sentence and will serve out the rest of her time.
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Funny story: Bumper sticker tagging supports students denied diplomas

Bumper sticker tagging supports students denied diplomas

(Galesburg, IL) A resurgance in youths tagging cars with bumper stickers has returned to show support for five students denied their diplomas because of a cheering audience.
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Funny story: U.S.D.A. Recalls 5.7 Million Pounds of Ground Beef

U.S.D.A. Recalls 5.7 Million Pounds of Ground Beef

The U.S.D.A. has issued a recall on 5.7 million pounds of beef sold in eleven western states during the months of March and April. Fourteen people were infected with the e-coli virus after eating hamburger meat from a western meat packing plant manu...
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Funny story: NY Cops hold Brit Nanny

NY Cops hold Brit Nanny

95-year-old great grandmother Vera Pennyworth from Dorset in England is the latest foreign tourist to fall foul of New York's stringent jay walking laws.
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Funny story: Diana's Bones to go Under the Hammer

Diana's Bones to go Under the Hammer

The late Diana Princess of Wales' body is to be exhumed and the bones auctioned off in an ironic bid to help the upkeep of her grave.
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Funny story: Bush goes Soprano in front of Pope; asks for a little 'favor' in Cuba; Vatican calls in Sicilians for 'professional' advice

Bush goes Soprano in front of Pope; asks for a little 'favor' in Cuba; Vatican calls in Sicilians for 'professional' advice

Vatican, Rome - Making advance preparations for the passing of Fidel Castro, the communist and island dictator, Bush, in a private audience with the Pope, asked if the Holy See would be interested in "interceding" on behalf the Cuban people...
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Funny story: Leaked State Department memo warns of Cuba instability after Castro's death

Leaked State Department memo warns of Cuba instability after Castro's death

Washington, D.C. - The State Department believes that immediately following, Fidel Castro, the Caribbean island dictator's passing, a title wave of millions of Cuban immigrants wanting to improve their lot in life will leave the island all at onc...
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Funny story: Hirst reveals reality plans

Hirst reveals reality plans

London, Sunday - Controversial artist Damien Hirst has revealed plans for a new reality TV show at the unveiling of his latest controversial masterpiece, a diamond human skull.
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Funny story: Paris Hilton bulimic?

Paris Hilton bulimic?

Twin Towers, Los Angeles - (Ass Mess): Shrinks at the Twin Towers jail psych ward have reported that Paris Hilton may be bulimic and could have carefully hidden her addition to self-purging for over a decade. The petulant heiress has spent two ni...
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Funny story: President Bush Pardons Paris Hilton

President Bush Pardons Paris Hilton

Breaking News! President George W. Bush has just announced that he is pardoning infamous hotel fortune heiress Paris Hilton.
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Funny story: Corrupt Bastards Club to Impose Eminent Domain On Intellectual Property Rights

Corrupt Bastards Club to Impose Eminent Domain On Intellectual Property Rights

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - The Corrupt Bastards Club voted overwhelmingly to impose Eminent Domain on intellectual property rights. It's not enough for them to take your property, they want your mind as well.
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Funny story: Giuliani Tries to Gain Black Vote

Giuliani Tries to Gain Black Vote

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - New York - Rudy Giuliani flitted about as he headed toward his Mercedes limousine in preparation to head to a New York slum to appeal to the "little people." He headed to an open-air crack cocaine market and thousand...
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Funny story: Paris Hilton Denied Razor And Wax In Prison

Paris Hilton Denied Razor And Wax In Prison

Paris Hilton has reportedly been denied razors (electric and blade) in her prison. She has also been denied access to hot wax and Brazilian Bikini Wax specialists. As her stay will be under 60 days (with good behaviour), she will also not in the ne...
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Funny story: Paris Hilton Feels Humiliated

Paris Hilton Feels Humiliated

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Los Angeles - Paris Hilton, after kicking, screaming, and whining all the way to jail said that she was extremely humiliated and that people should be paying attention to important things like the War in Iraq and the men and wo...
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Funny story: Afghanistan's national treasure traded for holiday ornaments and bits of tinsel

Afghanistan's national treasure traded for holiday ornaments and bits of tinsel

US and A - Afghanistan's Bactrian Collection, a hoard of more than 20,000 precious gold and culturally significant artifacts, has been turned over to the National Geographic Society and National Endowment for the Humanities in exchange for a half...
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Funny story: Cheney's pacemaker no longer requires replacement

Cheney's pacemaker no longer requires replacement

WASHINGTON - Vice President Dick Cheney's routine checkup on Friday revealed no new blockages in his circulatory system, and doctors said he no longer needs a new battery for a special pacemaker he has in his chest, a spokeswoman said.
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Funny story: Nicole Richie Enters Convent/Rehab

Nicole Richie Enters Convent/Rehab

Nicole Richie has signed up to enter the, Blessed Angels of Mercy, convent rehab. BAM as it's know to former patients, is probably the toughest rehab on the planet. BAM uses the, ruler across the knuckles, big wooden paddle across the backside me...
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Funny story: Paris Hilton's Vagina is #1

Paris Hilton's Vagina is #1

A survey by, Net Numbers, revealed Paris Hilton is the #1 search on the net for the past month straight. It's anticipated her popularity will only get stronger as the rest of her jail stay unfolds.
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Funny story: George Bush Declares War on Rhode Island

George Bush Declares War on Rhode Island

The Bush administration announced today it was formally declaring war on the State of Rhode Island. Rhode Island was the last state of the original 13 states to ratify the United States Constitution. Rhode Island, "the smallest state with the lo...
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Funny story: Google Maps captures American prison camps

Google Maps captures American prison camps

Google mainframes were attacked by hackers Sunday exposing unpublished satellite photos of FEMA prison camps in America.
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Funny story: Giuliani to Pick Up Key Endorsement from Death

Giuliani to Pick Up Key Endorsement from Death

The Seventh Circle of Hell Action News Reports- Rumors have begun to circulate that Death will reverse his tradition of supporting Democratic candidates and will in fact be endorsing Rudy Giuliani in his bid for the White House. Deat...
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50
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35
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24
11th
47
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37
13th
50
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45
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56
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34
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41
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54
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