Funny story: Chelsea Supporters Write New Chant for Manchester United

Chelsea Supporters Write New Chant for Manchester United

LONDON (Heewack News Network) -- A new season approaches for the English Premier League--and for Chelsea FC supporters, a change of heart and best wishes to their good friends at Manchester United.
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Funny story: Property prices plummet as Heather Mills moves into country des res

Property prices plummet as Heather Mills moves into country des res

Wessex, England - (Daftass Press): Property prices have slumped in the heart of the South East England stockbroker belt where Heather Mills has pitched up along with her retinue of bodyguards, domestic servants, macrobiotic vegan shamans and hired hi...
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Funny story: Drunken Tennessee pastor offers cops blow job to escape indecency rap

Drunken Tennessee pastor offers cops blow job to escape indecency rap

Washington County, Tennessee - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): A drunken fundamentalist pastor who spreads the word on evangelical Christian radio was arrested today after tempting highway partol officers with an offer of oral sex.
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Funny story: Brown announces existence of UFOs

Brown announces existence of UFOs

People around the world have long been spotting alleged UFOs in our skies. Prime Minister Gordon Brown announced today that the mysterious objects are in fact part of an international spy program.
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Funny story: U.N. Troops Sent To Wrong Place

U.N. Troops Sent To Wrong Place

(New York) - In a major logistical error 26,000 U.N. peacekeeping troops, instead of being deployed to the African region of Darfur, were sent to a local golf course in nearby Queens, New York.
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Funny story: Bush announces candidacy for third term

Bush announces candidacy for third term

Today the White House announced that President Bush would be seeking his party's nomination for a third term as President.
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Funny story: It's hard out there for a typist

It's hard out there for a typist

I work as a typist in a Manufacturing MNC, and am considered one of the best in this country. But you know what? It's just not worth it! You slog you arse, burn the midnight oil, work when the whole world is sleeping, all in order to become a typist. Then after you've become one, the stark reality hits you-kaboom- It just wasn't worth it!...
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Funny story: Alaska in turmoil as corruption probe digs deep beneath the political perma-frost

Alaska in turmoil as corruption probe digs deep beneath the political perma-frost

Anchorage, Alaska - (Ass Mess): Years of well-buried collusion, corruption, graft, embezzlement, bribery, witness-subornment and machiavellian shenanignas worthy of the Borgias are coming to light in the frozen wastes of oil-rich Alaska following a...
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Funny story: NRA award for 'best friend' King George as man shot in the back

NRA award for 'best friend' King George as man shot in the back

Memphis, Tennessee - (Rioters): The National Rifle Association is recommending its highest award for King George, a resident of Raleigh, near Memphis after a 21 year old man was accidentally shot in the back today.
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Funny story: Rumsfeld Investigated in Bird Flu Scam

Rumsfeld Investigated in Bird Flu Scam

Washington D.C. (IP) - Former Secretary of Offense Donald De Rumsfelt is being investigated for his role in a world wide scam designed to make billions of dollars in profits based on a phony bird flu scam. Washington DC Special Prosecutor Poindexte...
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Funny story: Fish Drowning Worldwide

Fish Drowning Worldwide

Atlantic Ocean (IP) - Scintist aboard the submersible craft with the very French sounding name of Voulez Vouz Couche Avec Un Poisson have discovered that fish everywhere are drowning. They believe that the fish suddenly realized that they had no nos...
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Funny story: Dick Cheney Accidentally Shoots Britney Spears

Dick Cheney Accidentally Shoots Britney Spears

(Washington, D.C.) Dick Cheney seems to have his eye on bigger game than long time Republican supporters like Harry Whittington, an alleged 911 call from the Cheney household late last evening claimed that the Vice President, while Tivo-ing a Britney...
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Funny story: Interview with Sir John Cleggs-Bennett. Part 1

Interview with Sir John Cleggs-Bennett. Part 1

Sir John Cleggs-Bennett (now deceased) was not your ordinary type of man. It is only because of his fairly recent death it's now possible to publish the transcripts of his interview with me. Just to put the importance of this event into context, this is the only interview he allowed to take place and be transcribed.
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Funny story: No penis on Wal-Mart's Jesus dolls

No penis on Wal-Mart's Jesus dolls

New York - (Ass Mess): "It was a commercial as well as ethical decision," a Wal-Mart spokesman asid today in reply to questions about just how life-like the retailer's Jesus dolls really are.
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Funny story: BA: the world's favorite price fixer fined £350 million

BA: the world's favorite price fixer fined £350 million

Heathrow Airport, London - (Disastrous Press): BA has been fined a total of £350 million for screwing over passengers with exorbitant fuel surcharges which they then lied about while paying its fatcat bosses outrageous productivity bonuses.
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Funny story: New DeLorean orders: Ford go back to drawing board

New DeLorean orders: Ford go back to drawing board

With the threat of the DeLorean going back into full production, some 25 years after the last one rolled off the line, Ford have today announced plans to reissue the Model T.
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Funny story: Manchester City Owner's Human Rights Abuses 'Weren't That Bad'

Manchester City Owner's Human Rights Abuses 'Weren't That Bad'

The lawyer of new Manchester City football club owner Thaksin Shinawatra has said that, although the ex-Thai Prime Minister has abused the Thai people's Human Rights, the degree of abuse...
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Funny story: Groundhog Day...It Could Be Nearer Than You Think

Groundhog Day...It Could Be Nearer Than You Think

Forget Christmas and put New Year on the back burner because if bonkers Brussels bureaucrats have their way then Europe will soon be stuck permanently in July.
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Funny story: Gordon Brown will not intervene in the ownership of Southampton FC

Gordon Brown will not intervene in the ownership of Southampton FC

Looney Labour Leader and newly promoted UK President Gordon Brown will not intervene in the ownership of football clubs despite fresh concerns over new Southampton owner Osama Bin Laden.
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Funny story: Flood waters receding; Ark not finished

Flood waters receding; Ark not finished

As is usual with large building projects in the UK, the Ark that is being built in Tewkesbury in response to the flooding is not yet ready for launch, and is already £15m over budget. The project was immediately put a week behind schedule when three...
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Funny story: Ker-Ching! As Fish-Flogging Fast Food Chain Is Squids In

Ker-Ching! As Fish-Flogging Fast Food Chain Is Squids In

Fish-flogging fast food chain, Harry Ramsden, is hoping to boost its fortunes with a new gourmet range and believes that it will have the squids ringing through its tills.
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Funny story: UN aid for United Kingdom

UN aid for United Kingdom

In an unexpected move today, the UN promised $250 trillion USD in aid for the "impoverished" United Kingdom today.
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Funny story: Breaking News - Bin Laden found

Breaking News - Bin Laden found

Osama Bin Laden was discovered today living in England and living a peaceful life as a North East entrepreneur.
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Funny story: HMV Plans Massive Fopp Clear-Out

HMV Plans Massive Fopp Clear-Out

HMV, the music and book retailer, has secured a deal to buy the Fopp brand and will shortly reopen all of its stores.
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Funny story: Rupert Murdoch buys Wall Street Journal, says next he'll buy England

Rupert Murdoch buys Wall Street Journal, says next he'll buy England

You can bet serious money - $1.00 even - that the news about the sale of The Wall Street Journal and the rest of Dow Jones & Company in today's spoof websites will be fully and ferociously reported, with a quarter given to Rupert Murdoch.
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Funny story: Cuban Bassist Israel 'Cachao' Lopez In Name War with Disney's Pixar Studios

Cuban Bassist Israel 'Cachao' Lopez In Name War with Disney's Pixar Studios

"That freakin' car Lightning McQueen thinks he can use my name as a catch-phrase. I can't believe it. Ka-Chow? I got your Ka-Chow right here McQueen! One phone call and I'll have you in a chop-shop so fast…" Cachao, an 88 year o...
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Funny story: TheSpoof.com writer goes on rampage

TheSpoof.com writer goes on rampage

Weirdvillie,MO - (Rooters) Jerrbear writer for the spoof news site TheSpoof.com has gone on a rampage today.
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Funny story: Volcano shoots sh*t up to three miles away

Volcano shoots sh*t up to three miles away

MANILA, Philippines (Rooters) -- A volcano in the central Philippines spewed sh*t everywhere early Tuesday, blanketing fields and villages as far as three miles away, but there was no immediate sign of a major eruption, scientists said.
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