There were 51 spoof news stories published in June 2003. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.

Funny story: Lonely-Hearts ads to become entirely acronyms

Lonely-Hearts ads to become entirely acronyms

Lonely-Hearts adverts that you may see at the back of any tabloid newspaper or magazine, are set to become even more cryptic. Many tabloid newspapers have released a statement to the effect that all adverts will become entirely acronym based, in orde...
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Funny story: Ghost Porn hits the net - it's everywhere!

Ghost Porn hits the net - it's everywhere!

Ghost pornography is the latest internet craze that's unlikely to go down well in your local church. But according to internet expert Mark Thomson, its popularity is rising: "Ghost porn is a fairly strange phenomena - if you'll excuse th...
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Funny story: Tennis Craze Hits UK Pubs

Tennis Craze Hits UK Pubs

As is usual at this time of year the tennis craze has hit the UK hard, with the Queens and Wimbledon tournaments making the brits literally drool whilst watching in an often comatose and inebriated state. Pubs have been quick to latch on to this craz...
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Funny story: Dusty Bin to become gay icon

Dusty Bin to become gay icon

3-2-1's most famous asset - the Bin - has been taken high upon the shoulders of self-proclaimed "gay people", and is set to become the next big thing amongst queers.
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Funny story: The real deal on food

The real deal on food

A.A. Gill is a damn liar. 'The Sunday Times' columnist has, for many years now, fooled the nation's broadsheet-buying public into thinking that he was a food critic. Fools! "Gill" (if, I very much doubt, that is his real name) can now be exposed as the fraud that he truly is. For while the words underneath his name may say 'Food Critic', have you ever actual...
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Funny story: SMS Blamed for New Spate of Illiteracy

SMS Blamed for New Spate of Illiteracy

In a study carried out in England and Wales, it has been found that children who send over ten text messages (txts) per day are producing increasingly poor work.
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Funny story: Home Office tighten security after Parker-Bowles break-in at Windsor

Home Office tighten security after Parker-Bowles break-in at Windsor

Home Secretary David Blunkett has apologised to the Royal Family and promised tighter security after last week's break in at Prince William's 21st birthday 'bash'. Invited guests at the party were shocked to see Camilla Parker-Bowles...
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Funny story: Tennis, it's a funny old game

Tennis, it's a funny old game

I was watching tennis last night on the telly, and I didn't quite understand what it was about. Two people just hitting a ball around, I mean come on! At least with football you have some kind of team action going on. But with tennis it's just like, what?!...
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Funny story: My White Plastic Chair

My White Plastic Chair

My White Plastic Chair by Phrank Phraser. I should be feeling guilty. I really should be hanging my sunburnt head in shame and pleading for forgiveness for having idled away so much precious time doing nothing. But strangely I’m not. And what’s more I don’t care.
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Funny story: Troops find Saddam's hidden stockpile!

Troops find Saddam's hidden stockpile!

The US and the UK today announced the finding of a massive stockpile of hidden Grecian 2000, hair dying products!...
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Funny story: I want to form a progressive rock band

I want to form a progressive rock band

How old are you? Are you young? Are you reasonably trendy? Can you play some sort of instrument? Do you know people similarly....afflicted? Fine. Then everything's set up for you. All you have to do now is find a song writer.
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Funny story: Saddam's 'Y' Front Shocker

Saddam's 'Y' Front Shocker

The Allies were shaken by intelligence reports suggesting that Saddam has made an audacious escape from Iraq by wearing a pair of ?Y' fronts.
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Funny story: Shroud of Turin - just a handkerchief!

Shroud of Turin - just a handkerchief!

Researchers at Oxford University have found evidence that the infamous 'Shroud of Turin', said to be the death-cloth of Jesus Christ, does indeed date back to the first century AD.
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Funny story: Girl Survives Bitch Attack

Girl Survives Bitch Attack

A young grammar school girl, Felicity Crockett, aged 13 and 3/4, survived a horrific bitch attack today. The young Welsh girl was assaulted by other girls her own age from her Grammar school in Yorkshire.
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Funny story: Computer giant to release new 'Dell-boy' PC

Computer giant to release new 'Dell-boy' PC

Computer Giant DELL are to release their new brand PC, the 'Dell-boy'. The machine is a 2.5Ghz P4, with a zirconia-encrusted gold case.
View 'Computer giant to release new 'Dell-boy' PC'
Funny story: School Underachiever 'Comes Good

School Underachiever 'Comes Good

School boy Callum Horrocks (7) was pronounced World Champion Thumb Wrestler at the Internation Thumb Wars (ITW), Blackpool UK.
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Funny story: Plutonium Sneaks into Windor Castle

Plutonium Sneaks into Windor Castle

There was public anger this afternoon after it was discovered that three tonnes of weapons-grade plutonium managed to sneak past Windsor Castle police officers, enter the Royal bedroom, and make love to the Queen.
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Funny story: Auction Channels Shorten Life Expectancy

Auction Channels Shorten Life Expectancy

Various health groups say TV shopping auction style channels should be banned on evidence which indicates they shorten life expectancies. Channels such as bid-up.tv and Auction-World.tv sell highly-marked up goods at knock down prices in an aucti...
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Funny story: Bring back Birds of a Feather!

Bring back Birds of a Feather!

Sometimes we all wake up in the morning and ask ourselves this question: "How do I fill the gap in my life that's been left gaping, by the departure of Birds of a Feather from our TV screens?" Well, I know I woke up this morning with exactly that question on my brain. Oh, how I would laugh at Dorien's constantly rancid sexual practises, Sharon's compulsive obses...
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Funny story: The state of the world

The state of the world

I don't want to start some cocksure diatribe about how everything is dumb except me. I don't want to stick my fingers in my ears and shout endless incantations about wishing death and disease on everyone I encounter. I don't want to go to work in a morning. But these are all things that I do end up doing.
View 'The state of the world'
Funny story: Big Brother Bosses Condemned

Big Brother Bosses Condemned

Bosses at Channel 4 have received hundreds of complaints by rejected entrants saying their selection process was far too discriminative and unfair.
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Funny story: Alien Tech-No-Logy

Alien Tech-No-Logy

If I was to say to you that aliens existed, you'd probably stop punching me in the face and kick me in the nuts. But for one small town in the north of England it seems alien technology is high on the agenda.
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Funny story: Tatu joined by young male!

Tatu joined by young male!

Controversial lesbian pop "duo" Tatu have surprisingly announced another addition to their band: a baby boy!...
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Funny story: Don McLean writes 47 minute song for new album

Don McLean writes 47 minute song for new album

Veteran musician, Don McLean - famous for recently murdered song 'American Pie' - has released plans to include a 47 minute song on his new Album: "Screw Madonna".
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Funny story: Blair offends royals with 'Alistair McGowen style' poses

Blair offends royals with 'Alistair McGowen style' poses

Beloved PM, Tony Blair, has today angered royals with his recent portrayal of Prince Charles on top TV show "Alastair McGowen's Big Impression".
View 'Blair offends royals with 'Alistair McGowen style' poses'
Funny story: Man finds joke in 'Rack of Wine'

Man finds joke in 'Rack of Wine'

The day was just like any other Tuesday, when this intrepid reporter came across the image as shown. For a second, maybe two, the image meant nothing to me - it was just a couple of bottles of wine.
View 'Man finds joke in 'Rack of Wine''
Funny story: Blunkett sacking shock

Blunkett sacking shock

Shock has spread throughout the political landscape tonight after the news that Tony Blair has sacked Home Secretary David Blunkett for "not knowing what people look like".
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Funny story: Women to come with warning

Women to come with warning

Health ministers today declared that in future all women would come with a warning.
View 'Women to come with warning'
Funny story: James Randi pays out $1million JREF Challenge prize to Uri Geller

James Randi pays out $1million JREF Challenge prize to Uri Geller

James Randi, head of the JREF Foundation, a foundation dedicated to debunking the paranormal, supernormal and other "ending in normal" things, has this week been forced to admit defeat.
View 'James Randi pays out $1million JREF Challenge prize to Uri Geller'
Funny story: Tennis stars - are they holograms?

Tennis stars - are they holograms?

The internet...it's a wonderful place where knowledge, wisdom and common-sense are thrown out of the window. But if we've learned anything, it's that real life sometimes is as crazy as Internet life. And that's certainly true...
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Funny story: Butcher jailed for whipping out beef in public place

Butcher jailed for whipping out beef in public place

Like many a butcher, Jeff Wade had often been criticised for his apron wearing, an affront to the many people who don't wear aprons and thought by many to be 'over-egging the pudding', clotheswise.
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Funny story: 'Bums!' says world's most expensive computer

'Bums!' says world's most expensive computer

Sources at Datcomp, the US's largest military and science computer manufacturer, have leaked reports of a large-scale blunder at their headquarters in New Mexico.
View ''Bums!' says world's most expensive computer'
Funny story: American Football to be renamed 'socca'

American Football to be renamed 'socca'

The NFL, American Football's controlling board, have stated that American Football is to be renamed 'socca'. To fit in with what they called 'the 21st Century way of being', the NFL have decided to rename the sport simply because...
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Funny story: 'Most pretentious band' awards hot up

'Most pretentious band' awards hot up

The first ever annual awards show for 'most pretentious band' is ready to announce it's candidates this week. Many tip Rock and Rap bands to top the awards list, including artists like P Diddy and bands like Limp Bizkit.
View ''Most pretentious band' awards hot up'
Funny story: Sports star re-writes history book

Sports star re-writes history book

A sports star who we're unable to name for legal reasons has been arrested for unlawfully re-writing a history book.
View 'Sports star re-writes history book'
Funny story: SETI@Home results accidentally deleted - no backup!

SETI@Home results accidentally deleted - no backup!

The SETI@Home project has been running on many a computer for the past 4 years, downloading peta-bytes of 'narrow band signals' to their computers 'searching for extra-terrestrial life'. However, the project's organisers have anno...
View 'SETI@Home results accidentally deleted - no backup!'
Funny story: Russian Steelworker Arrested

Russian Steelworker Arrested

The NYPD have detained a Russian holiday maker, Dimiti Gloopy (32), today for attempting to import steel illegally into the US. The offending article was a container of stainless-steel cutlery, which Mr Gloopy had allegedly concealed within his l...
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Funny story: Blind man says: 'stop licking my eyes!'

Blind man says: 'stop licking my eyes!'

A blind man in Turesca, Italy, is said to be suing family members following allegations that they would sneak into his room whilst asleep and lick his eyeballs.
View 'Blind man says: 'stop licking my eyes!''
Funny story: Women found to have larger knees than men

Women found to have larger knees than men

In the latest battle of the sexes, it has been found that most large legged women have bigger knees than most small legged men. The startling results, discovered by Research Group 'Kneetech' are said to be causing a stir.
View 'Women found to have larger knees than men'
Funny story: Hasselhoff to become ITN's latest newsreader

Hasselhoff to become ITN's latest newsreader

News company, ITN, have lured Knight-Rider star David Hasselhoff into a £2million deal to read the evening news. Hasselhoff is said to be 'extremely hungry.
View 'Hasselhoff to become ITN's latest newsreader'
Funny story: Elton John told to 'fuck off'

Elton John told to 'fuck off'

Somehow popular musical entertainer, Elton John, was today told to 'fuck off', by me.
View 'Elton John told to 'fuck off''
Funny story: Man claims woman 'nagged' him

Man claims woman 'nagged' him

A man in Essex has today announced that his girlfriend of 1 year has nagged him.
View 'Man claims woman 'nagged' him'
Funny story: Alice admits that 'wonderland' was "trippy as f**k"

Alice admits that 'wonderland' was "trippy as f**k"

Alice, star of famed children's book 'Alice in Wonderland', has today announced that her experience was 'trippy as f**k'. Alice's language has shocked many people, whilst the rest seem rather blase about the announcement.
View 'Alice admits that 'wonderland' was "trippy as f**k"'
Funny story: Rooney gives England coach Selection headache

Rooney gives England coach Selection headache

England's footballing child-wonderstar, Wayne Rooney, has been cautioned after giving Sven Goran Eriksson a pounding headache. The injury was bestowed on Eriksson by Rooney's insistence in playing his heavy-metal records (by a band called Sel...
View 'Rooney gives England coach Selection headache'
Funny story: Weetabix to be 'enhanced' with Viagra

Weetabix to be 'enhanced' with Viagra

Cereal favourite, Weetabix, is said to be launched within the next few months in a new variety: "Weetabix Ultra". This 'enhanced' version of the cereal is said to include small chunks of popular erectile tissue encourager, Viagra.
View 'Weetabix to be 'enhanced' with Viagra'
Funny story: The future is bright - but smelly!

The future is bright - but smelly!

Scientists at Caltech University, FL. have started research on small bacteria that will process or eat, faeces whilst still in the body. Microbiologist, Mark Thompson, explained:...
View 'The future is bright - but smelly!'
Funny story: Classroom investigation: Stress caused by hard times

Classroom investigation: Stress caused by hard times

Scientists this week announced plans to investigate the hypothesis that stress is caused by difficulties in peoples' lives.
View 'Classroom investigation: Stress caused by hard times'
Funny story: New 'Pop Idle' TV show

New 'Pop Idle' TV show

Contestants are now being head-hunted for a new television entertainment show 'Pop Idle'. The aim of the show is to pick the most able but least motivated out of a group of 15 to 25 year olds.
View 'New 'Pop Idle' TV show'
Funny story: 'Luckiest' man alive dies in horrid accident

'Luckiest' man alive dies in horrid accident

Dan 'Lucky' McLuck, died earlier this week in what can only be described as a shocking and horrible accident.
View ''Luckiest' man alive dies in horrid accident'
Funny story: Cherie Blair to change sex - revealed by husband's gaffe.

Cherie Blair to change sex - revealed by husband's gaffe.

Media personnel were shocked today as Tony Blair has announced that he announced: "I am 100% behind my wife's decision to change sex", during a press conference about the Gulf War II. Blair's gaffe caused shocked outbursts by those...
View 'Cherie Blair to change sex - revealed by husband's gaffe.'
Funny story: Killer dog ransacks baby shop

Killer dog ransacks baby shop

Lawyers from Mothercare today decided to take an injunction from canine "Bob" who they describe as a "killer dog". Bob, 6, has been visiting Mothercare since he was a pup. He would find his way in through a large letter box, and w...
View 'Killer dog ransacks baby shop'
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