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Health and Wellbeing

Join us for a fun and lively yoga class followed by medication. Beginners welcome.

written by Richard-Rasch, 03 September 2008
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In Response to BuckwheatsButt

I suffer from Alzheimers and I would like to point out that another good thing about having Alzheimers is that you get to meet new people every day.

written by Richard-Rasch, 03 September 2008
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Competence of TV doctor questioned

The competence of TV's Doctor Hilary has been called into question today after he told one caller "Hemorrhoids are relatively easy to treat, but they can be a real pain in the neck."

written by Richard-Rasch, 02 September 2008
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Police appeal for witnesses

Police are appealing for witnesses after a man was attacked in the early hours of the morning. The victim is said to have suffered 'at least two broken legs'.

written by Richard-Rasch, 02 September 2008
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Smokers

Give up smoking in one easy step. Each day avoid having your first fag. This will ensure you can't have your second, third, fourth...

written by Richard-Rasch, 02 September 2008
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Be a hit on the spoof!

Write an irreverent news story titled 'Harry Potter in Seven Dwarfs Sex Scandal', fill it with 'Frankie Howerd-esque' innuendo and awful puns. Mention where possible any 90s TV hasbeen.

written by Richard-Rasch, 02 September 2008
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Panic as Hyperinflation Reaches America

US citizens have been told to remain calm as hyperinflation reaches America. The government have assured everyone there is no need to panic - 28GG glamour model Jordan will return to Britain tomorrow.

written by Richard-Rasch, 02 September 2008
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Lizard For Sale

Lizard for sale. Needs terrarium. Friendly temperament. Eats cricketers.

written by Richard-Rasch, 02 September 2008
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Church bulletin misprint

Church choir in desperate need of new sinnners.

written by Richard-Rasch, 02 September 2008
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Testicular cancer awareness concert

Chris Moyles has been criticised for his insensitive opening of a concert to raise awareness of testicular cancer.
The radio one DJ opened the gig with the sound check "testes, testes, 1-2, 1-2."

written by Richard-Rasch, 02 September 2008
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'Back off' says Kerry Katona

Kerry Katona says being hounded by the media on a daily basis has caused her depression. The News of the World said they would like to apologize to the porky dumbass bitch.

written by Richard-Rasch, 02 September 2008
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Fatfighters meeting

This week's weigh-in will take place at the Salvation Army Hall at 6pm. Please use large double doors at the side of the property.

written by Richard-Rasch, 02 September 2008
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Muslims throw party for Brits

In a bid to strengthen their relationship with Brits, the Muslim community are planning to throw them a party. It will be an exciting evening of entertainment, fine-dining and gracious hostility.

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
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Jade Goody realises severity of cancer scare

"When I found out I had clerical cancer I thought they'd just take out my collar bone or somfink. I never fort it was anyfink serious...but now I realise it is - I might even need Chameleontherapy."

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
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Announcements - What's on

The Youth Amateur Dramatic Society will stage their production of Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet at the town hall at 7.30pm on Friday. Everyone is invited to attend this tragedy.

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
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Cabinet for sale

For sale: China cabinet. Extremely fragile.

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
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Weighwatchers

Lose pounds quickly. Call 0906 4444 4573 333 now for details. Calls cost £2.50 per min.

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
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Crap2Cash

Trade your unwanted gods for cash today.

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
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Job advert

Child-miner needed. Must be available for immediate start.

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
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Housekeeping services

Fed up of cleaning yourself? Let me do it for you! Experienced housekeeper. £7 per hour.

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
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Bed For Sale

King size bed. Mahogany. Ideal for antique lover.

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
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Handy Bathroom Tips

The bathroom can be a dangerous place. Avoid slipping in the bath by placing a rubber mat on the bottom.

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
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For Sale

Pine dressing table for a lady with wide legs and large drawers. £90 ono.

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
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Jobs

3 year old teacher required for pre-school day nursery. Experience essential.

written by Richard-Rasch, 01 September 2008
Showing page 1 (of 2 pages)


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