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Showing snippets written by Arthur Pint.
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Penal Reform
Mr Arthur Penis announced today that he has changed his name to end the years of torment and misery it has bought him. He will henceforth be known as 'Justin Side'.
Pit Bull(sh*t) Horror
UK consumers were today literally 'up in arms' as a leading anti-perspirant manufacturer inadvertently added starch to one of their under-arm products.
Competitors Kick Off in Health and Safety Row
This year's annual 'one-legged-man arse kicking competition' has been cancelled following concerns from local health and safety officials. Participants are said to be hopping mad at the decision.
UK-Wide Sex Strike
Ugly women throughout the UK were today reported as being "devastated" that no-one was particularly bothered that they are on a week-long sex strike. Threats to extend it to a second week seems to have prompted similar indifference amongst the male population.
Queen Pregnant
Buckingham Palace announced earlier today that Queen Elizabeth is expecting her fifth child. Its either that, or she's going to let out a cracking fart any time soon.
Bowling Balled
An ill-fated UK man was rushed to hospital after having sex with a bowling ball. As he withdrew his penis from a finger hole, he found that his right testicle was lodged in the thumb-hole. Poor chap.
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