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Showing snippets written by Ben Macnair.


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Nostalgia

Nostalgia is not what it used to be, as sales of rose tinted spectacles have fallen for the first time in years.

written by Ben Macnair, 14 September 2017
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Cakes

Teresa May is currently in talks with Channel Four about a presenting gig on The Great British Bake Off. She wants to give a strong and stable foundation to the show's soggy bottom.

written by Ben Macnair, 09 June 2017
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No, anyone but Boris

Boris Johnson was early seen on a zip-wire, heading into an open window at Buckingham Palace, to put his own ideas about a new government to the Queen.

written by Ben Macnair, 09 June 2017
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Fishing for tiddlers

There may be plenty more fish in the sea, but following the Ashley Madison leak, far fewer people are willing to get their tackle out.

written by Ben Macnair, 15 November 2015
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Yogurts

According to the Daily Mail, the forthcoming yogurt apocalypse will be started by the seventy third series of Great British Bake Off.

written by Ben Macnair, 06 November 2015
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Far Right

Alphabetically, the Daily Mail will always be on the far left of The Guardian, and The Independent.

written by Ben Macnair, 06 November 2015
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Cheggers

Keith Chegwin is to have a new show on Radio Three - Cheggers plays Dvorak.

written by Ben Macnair, 06 November 2015
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Mr Johnson, again

Now that the Labour leader election has been won, we can move onto more important things, like beating the conservatives says Boris Johnson.

written by Ben Macnair, 06 November 2015
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Top Trumps

When asked how much Zoe Ball might be paid if she accepted an offer to co-host Top Gear, her father Johnny said think of a number.

written by Ben Macnair, 06 November 2015
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Pressing matters

Ironically, he tends to wear shorts, so sales in the Jeremy Corbyn trouserpress are not likely to go up anytime soon.

written by Ben Macnair, 06 November 2015
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Missing Milliband Brother Found

Steve Milliband, the brother of Dave and Ed has been found. He is not to be confused with the popular 1970's beat combo.

written by Ben Macnair, 07 November 2010
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Boris Johnson has a lie in

London Major Boris Johnson has had a lie in. He is reading the Sunday Times, and having a lazy day. The Daily Mail are investigating.

written by Ben Macnair, 07 November 2010
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Simon Cowell, again

Robson and Jerome are to sue Simon Cowell for millions, claiming that they started his career. Millions of people will sue Robson and Jerome for unleashing their version of Unchained Melody.

written by Ben Macnair, 06 November 2010
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X-Factor

Simon Cowell has decided to leave the X-Factor, as he claims it is below his dignity............

written by Ben Macnair, 06 November 2010
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Jordon's New Book

Celebrity Katie Price launches a new book. It is called three marriages in ten years,the easy, stress free way. We would like to warn second husband Alex Reid that he should not get too comfortable.

written by Ben Macnair, 06 November 2010
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James Blunt

Pop singer James Blunt is said to be following a career in comedy, after appearing on Have I Got News For You. He is taking advice from Lempit Opik.

written by Ben Macnair, 05 November 2010
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Clegg

Nick Clegg, the wonderboy of the Conservative Party is set to play Prince Charming in Pantomime this Christmas. Boris Johnson has been offered a part in a new farce......The Conservative Party.

written by Ben Macnair, 05 November 2010
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A man has been released from Prison after a brief spell as a Kleptomaniac.

He is said to be taken something for it.

written by Ben Macnair, 28 November 2008
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F.A.R.T

The spokesman for the (real) Fight Against Red Tape still has not realised the childishness of their anacroym.

written by Ben Macnair, 03 October 2008
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Surprise naming

Dennis Hopper has named his latest child Space.

written by Ben Macnair, 20 September 2008
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Space Hoppers

Astronauts have taken a load of Space Hoppers into the furthest reaches of space. Due to the lack of gravity, they do not actually work.

written by Ben Macnair, 20 September 2008
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What's up Doc?

A cartoon Character died today, after having his parachute replaced by an Anvil. The Police have arrested a somewhat sarcastic rabbit.

written by Ben Macnair, 20 September 2008
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Tin Tin

Boy Detective Tin Tin has revealed that he was christened in a very echoey cave, and his name is actually just Tin.

written by Ben Macnair, 20 September 2008
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Good Life

Tom and Barbara Good, real-life inspiration for the chuckle fest The Good Life are set to sue for the BBC for the way in which they were portrayed.

written by Ben Macnair, 20 September 2008
Showing page 1 (of 7 pages)


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