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I do, I do, I do, I do.

A South African man who married four wives together says he intends to spread himself in four separate homes. Much like his wives, then.

written by Thompson & French, 27 May 2010
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German Chancellor

Angela Merkel has been re-elected as German Chancellor. Gordon Brown offered his congratulations and said one day he hopes to be elected, too.

written by Thompson & French, 12 October 2009
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I do, I do, I do, I do.

A South African man who married four wives together says he intends to spread himself in four separate homes. Much like his wives, then.

written by Thompson & French, 12 October 2009
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Knife crime stats

Doctors must now report both knife and gun injuries. Senior police chiefs are doubly pleased with the ruling as there's still no space on the forms for truncheons and tasers.

written by Thompson & French, 12 October 2009
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David Blunkett blind-sided over id cards

David Blunkett admitted to journalists in a pub that the trial ID card was badly designed, before being advised that he was holding a round beer mat.

written by Thompson & French, 07 August 2004
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Conservative Party Games

Tim Yeo has urged the Conservative Party to raise its game. Suggestions have included Brag and Scrabble though Michael Howard is known to favour anything that involves bats.

written by Thompson & French, 07 August 2004
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Michael Jackson pops out

Michael Jackson made an unexpected visit to a shopping mall and delighted fans. He denied it was just a publicity stunt and said that he often popped out for a nibble at the slightest invitation.

written by Thompson & French, 07 August 2004
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Religion & women again

The Pope said he will stand firm on women. At least until they stop wriggling about.

written by Thompson & French, 07 August 2004
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Vatican and feminism

The Pope condemned feminism as demeaning to women. He said a bunch of militant lezzers could never have the empathy and understanding that unmarried sado-masochistic men in dresses could produce.

written by Thompson & French, 07 August 2004
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German has words

Germany is holding a competition for the most beautiful German word. There are several thousand entries so far but the British bet for a winner is whichever one translates as Federal Superstate.

written by Thompson & French, 07 August 2004
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Footie News

The Chief Executive of the Football Association has resigned after his affair with Faria Alam. He said it was a mistake and that his ball control was about as good as England’s in Euro 2004.

written by Thompson & French, 07 August 2004
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