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Get Me Back In

A mum laughed so hard at a Michael McIntyre gig she went into labour! Unsurprisingly upon arrival the baby demanded to go back in

written by Backandtotheleft, 07 November 2015
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Merseyside Blindside

A Liverpool fan snuck into the Merseyside derby by pretending he was disabled. Don't know why there's outrage half of Liverpool are normally running a disability scam

written by Backandtotheleft, 07 November 2015
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Dire Dier

"Utility" player Eric Dier is in the England squad. They call him a "Utility" player because he plays like a toilet.

written by Backandtotheleft, 07 November 2015
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Missile Smile

Britain and France will work together in developing the next generation of missiles. Much like the old ones they'll primarily be used in hitting hospitals and schools by accident

written by Backandtotheleft, 07 November 2015
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Breakfast Time

Benefit fraud jumped to £1.3billion a year last year! Which is just enough to pay for Iain Duncan Smiths breakfast

written by Backandtotheleft, 07 November 2015
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Porn Peers

Peers in the House of Lords believe young people are under pressure to act like porn stars. Agreed. People are always trying to do plumbing with no qualifications

written by Backandtotheleft, 07 November 2015
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Eat The Rich

MPs want to bring back fox hunting. So they can get in practice for when they chase the greatest game of all. The poor

written by Backandtotheleft, 31 August 2015
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Bond Villain

Scientists have found sharks that live in a "active underground volcano" or as I call it "Bond villain HQ"

written by Backandtotheleft, 31 August 2015
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Robbie Apology

Robbie Williams has apologised for boozy Brits holidaying in Spain. So I'll take this chance to apologise for Robbie Williams

written by Backandtotheleft, 31 August 2015
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Different Directions

One Direction are to pursue solo projects. So instead of one terrible album were getting five. Hang on....lads get back together!

written by Backandtotheleft, 31 August 2015
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Arrested Development

Two drunk Man United fans were arrested on Wednesday. Sources say they were talking about winning the Champions league

written by Backandtotheleft, 31 August 2015
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Celebration Centre

The MOD have spent "£2million" on parties in the last year! Celebrating the success of Iraq, Libya and Afghanistan I presume

written by Backandtotheleft, 31 August 2015
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SNP P-Off

The SNP want to lower the retirement age in Scotland because their life expectancy is shorter. Same reasoning suggests we give drug addicts time off from work because their often so fucking high

written by Backandtotheleft, 12 April 2015
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Afford This

David Cameron has promised to double the amount of "cut price started homes" so expect a shanty town to be built on the outskirts of Leeds

written by Backandtotheleft, 11 March 2015
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Tory Toffs

The Tories say that the "North will not be left behind" as Britain prospers. Of course it won't. We'll be concreted over to make a car park for everyone in London's second cars

written by Backandtotheleft, 08 February 2015
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Stupid Kid Back Then

Experts are warning parents against the dangers of "Loom bands" as 4 children got them stuck up in their nose. Shouldn't we just be warning parents about the stupidity of their children?

written by Backandtotheleft, 08 February 2015
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Statistics

Deaths from heart disease are falling as more Brits commit suicide at a earlier age

written by Backandtotheleft, 08 February 2015
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The Grim Face Of Politics

Ed Miliband, Alex Salmond and Stephen Gault in a governmental coalition? The political equivalent of wanking with sandpaper

written by Backandtotheleft, 08 February 2015
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Kate In Sickness Fear

Princess Kate has been told to "stay away from work" due to her morning sickness. How will the economy cope without her smiling and waving when told?

written by Backandtotheleft, 02 October 2014
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Bus

Walking a mile a day cuts the risk of someone dying of cancer. But it also increases your chances of being hit by a bus

written by Backandtotheleft, 05 September 2014
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X-Factor Of The North

The X-Factor is back! With a Game Of Thrones style advert. Hopefully this means a revamp of the show and somebody might cut Mel B's head off

written by Backandtotheleft, 14 August 2014
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NHS Spite

British diplomats have spent £16K on cigars this year all while the NHS is having to perform operations with chip forks thanks to cutbacks

written by Backandtotheleft, 14 August 2014
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Whine About Wine

MPs will vote on whether or not wine bottles should have warning labels on them. Hopefully we'll be seeing vintage reds saying "Tastes like shit"

written by Backandtotheleft, 14 August 2014
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Fire Mad

A study has said that the long term inhalation of wood smoke can damage your IQ. Nonsense. Fire is red and good and hot and good. And good.

written by Backandtotheleft, 26 June 2014
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