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MDA ousts spokesperson Jerry Lewis, replaced with pictures of Lewis

The MDA has replaced Jerry Lewis with pictures of Lewis, fondly regaling audiences of the 2011 telethon with Lewis stories and telling them what Jerry would say had they not ordered him to job off.

written by Nash D. Plott, 05 September 2011
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German Banks Ink Deal with Transeuropa

The ferry to Belgium should be a lot safer, claims officials. German banks have already proved that they can float the entire country of Greece.

written by Nash D. Plott, 04 September 2011
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New Caledonian Cannibals Eat Clown

Cannibals ate a clown vacationing in New Caledonia. Officials learned of the incident when the cannibals got worried and went to a local clinic, claiming that the clown "tasted funny"

written by Nash D. Plott, 04 September 2011
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Talking Goldfish a Hoax

Investigations into claims of a talking goldfish in Topeka Kansas uncovered a hoax. Upon investigation the goldfish proved to be completely mute. The voice was in fact coming from the snail.

written by Nash D. Plott, 04 September 2011
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Amhadinhajad Announces Iranian Moon Mission

Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has announced an ambitious Iranian lunar program. The original movie set from the American lunar mission came up on Ebay, and Iran sniped it from the Chinese.

written by Nash D. Plott, 03 September 2011
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Casey Anthony Reveals all in New Book

In a new book co-authored by OJ Simpson, Florida mother Casey Anthony claims that her daughter Caylee was actually abducted by a dingo but that she lied our of fear that nobody would believe her.

written by Nash D. Plott, 03 September 2011
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Heather Mills Sues Waiter for Leg Slur

A waiter in Chatham was sued by Heather Mills for £100,000 of pain and humiliation. When Mills huffed down four desserts whe waiter quipped, "Got a hollow leg, luv?". Mills was manifestly unamused.

written by Nash D. Plott, 02 September 2011
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S&P Rates Willy Nelson at AAA credit rating; USA still at AA+

Standard & Poor's raised Willy Nelson's credit to AAA, making him suddenly more creditworthy than the United States of America. Said Willy, "Eat this, IRS.. and I'm still not going to shower"

written by Nash D. Plott, 02 September 2011
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American Military Policy switches to "Don't Look, Don't Listen"

"Don't ask, don't tell" is gone. American officials have announced a new more equitable policy based upon a combination of "Don't Look, Don't Listen" and "Keep it Down Over There"

written by Nash D. Plott, 01 September 2011
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Charlie Sheen Eaten by Trolls

Troubled actor Charlie Sheen was eaten by trolls as tried in vain to attract help. Workers at 911, who had received 53 calls from Sheen in the past 30 days, failed to take the call seriously.

written by Nash D. Plott, 01 September 2011
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Half of Canadian Navy Destroyed, Other Boat OK

The Canadian navy suffered a devastating loss when one of its two destroyers sank in the Persian Gulf. A spokesman attributed the accident to somebody leaving the toilet seat up during a storm.

written by Nash D. Plott, 01 September 2011
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