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Abu Hamza tattoo rejected as evidence in new york court.
The results of a recent body search were rejected by a New York court today. The Judge stated that a realistic buttock tattoo of geostratigist Zbigniew Brzezinski, does not constitute benign intent.
Pensioners cake tests positive for explosives
Chorlton Fineacre (86) of Solihull was arrested when a forensic team detected traces of explosives, and prescription sedatives in a seized lemon drizzle cake slice this morning.
Yeti floss synthetics implicated in sex dossier case.
Camble Goodtimes faces questioning today in Hull. Still defiant, he steadfastly stands by recent DNA results. Claiming no connection between Siberian toiletries, and recent harassment charge.
Helen Mirren face transplant for Queen
In an unusual move Her Majesty has legally purchased the the classic profile of beloved actress Helen Mirren. In a press release Mirren expressed excitement at resurrecting such a popular role.
Oral sextape scandal hits Royal couple. Chief Whip resigns
The now famous Royal Lug Nut Tapes have been traced back to Conservative party head quarters. The Right Honorable Simian Rench'Fister publicly defends the Chief Whip, and his right to a cycle path.
Channel 5 To Open Big Brother Style Assisted Suicide Clinics
In the battle for ratings Channel 5 have adopted a new approach. At the core of the programs format will be a terminal contestant based multiple choice/public phone vote system.
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