Spoof Snippets
Showing snippets written by Michael Balton.
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What Stinks Worse?
A. a disabled Carnival Cruise ship
B. a Sandy Alderson bullpen
New Perspectives On Primates
Some cultures consider monkey brains to be a delicacy.
Our culture considers monkey brains to be a Congress.
Against All Odds
An IKEA meatball won the third race at Belmont Park yesterday.
Baseball Bulletin
Big doings at New York's Citi Field tonight. The Mets are retiring Bernie Madoff's number. It's 162 million.
Rule of Three
Dick Clark...Richard Dawson...Who was Alex Trebek?
Nostalgia
Back to the days when the news was put on paper and the crooks were put in jail.
(Except for you, Richard Nixon. Hot down there, isn't it?)
Nostalgia
Back to the days when the news was put on paper and the crooks were put in jail.
(Except for you, Richard Nixon. Hot down there, isn't it?)
Memo to Jon Corzine:
You forgot to buckle up again, didn't you?
Herman Cain Reveals Secret Campaign Slogan
"Hold the pepperoni."
"I think I just spotted Snooki!"
"Since when do they allow dogs on this beach?"
You remember going to the beach...
It's like Facebook without shirts.
London Officials Test The Olympic Flame
With the Summer Olympics a year away, the city of London previewed a portion of the opening ceremonies last night. An enthusiastic crowd of 5,000 helped distribute the Olympic flame to 4 police cars.
Rupert Murdoch's Five Favorite Desserts
Alibi Pie
Half-Baked Excuses
Amnesia a la Mode
Cream-Filled Canards
And from Carvel... Fudgie the Truth
New economic stimulus scheme...
Schedule interest in dog years.
Diddy Changes His Name To 'Chuck Berry'
Purchases Naming Rights From Johnny B. Goode
Did you know?
It takes 40 gallons of sap to make one Weiner.
Economic Alert...
Bernanke gives cautiously optimistic 2nd quarter assessment: "I forgot to replace the batteries in my calculator."
US Bans Texting While Planking
And while you're at it, get that cell phone away from your head. It will fry your brain.
Giuliani Teams with Trump
Former New York Mayor Rudolph Giuliani and real estate mogul Donald Trump are developing a political puppet show together... "Trump and Rudy"
Congress Balances Budget With A $1.5 Trillion Groupon
"We've been waiting for this Deal of the Day for years now," said House Speaker John Boehner. "I even got a free pepperoni pizza for referring a friend."
Captured Videos Reveal…
Bin Laden Was Developing A BBQ Show For The Food Network:
"Death To The Unclean American Pigs"
Congress Agrees on Deficit Reduction Plan
Entire nation will appear on 'Wheel of Fortune.'
Rod Blagojevich Trades His Wife for a Jeep Grand Cherokee
"I couldn't resist," the former Illinois governor said. "They threw in free undercoating."
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