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Inbreeding Population Explosion Expected

Scientists blame infiltration of the Isle of Wight Festival by local residents promoting "Free Love"

written by Whitters, 13 June 2011
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Banker declares NO MORE!

A branch of popular bank MugsBank has admitted it has run out of money after every loan on its book failed to pay their installments last month. The Square Mile Branch manager blames bums and beggers.

written by Whitters, 27 October 2010
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British Rail to be Broken Up

Association of Train Operating Companies reveals that 80% of complaints are addressed to or refer to former railway incumbants. Government agrees to claim expenses to re-privatise so people realise.

written by Whitters, 27 October 2010
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Commonwealth Games Hit by Mystery Bug

Indian Authorities are at a loss as to why athletes have been falling ill with a mystery vomiting bug. Indian Government sources say they are only spiking food with laxatives.

written by Whitters, 09 October 2010
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BREAKING NEWS?

use a sledgehammer.

written by Whitters, 11 September 2010
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Blair cancels more book signings.

He advises police would be too stretched due to being busy arresting him for war crimes.

written by Whitters, 09 September 2010
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BREAKING: Runaway Train Reported Leaving London

A Runaway Train is currently out of control between Paddington and the turning for Heathrow. The Train Operator states for a change that the service will arrive at Reading "On Time"

written by Whitters, 03 September 2010
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Secret Reason For Baby

David & Samantha Cameron have held an interview with selected media. They confirm their new child was born now as "the country could be run better by a five year old". Next Election: 5 years then.

written by Whitters, 03 September 2010
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