Spoof Snippets
Showing snippets written by Cuff.
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Iconic Hollywood sign saved by Heffner
Soft Porn Czar Hugh Hefner donates funds to save the sign overlooking Tinseltown with a caveat: a y was added making the new symbol of glittz and glamour: HOLLYWOODY!
Bambino Crime Family Jailed
Egg throwing stereo stealing crime syndicate headed by seven y.o. Hoody Wank jailed as precaution. Held until after the general election after which they will be released to terrorize us
Famous Brit Flees Extradition From Art Scandal
Art Museum Curator Mr. Bean has fled to Somalia in order to flee extradition in the robbery of the famous American Painting 'Whistler's Mother'.
Sarkozy Issues Compromise on Burkas
French President Nicolas Sarkozi bows to public scrutiny on issue of Muslim women covering their faces in public. Sarkozy says now only the ugly women must wear veils.
T-shirts we would love to see
'The Democrat Congress went on a 3 trillion dollar shopping spree and all I got was this T-shirt which was made in China'
New Fire Regulations
All public facilities are required to replace expensive CO2 extinguishers with the more cost effective 2litre Coke bottles. Pepsi files suit immediately.
Clegg Declares Love Affair with America is Over!
PM hopeful cites the sudden rise of world wide opinion of the US is a direct result of the ended affair. Obama agrees saying that Britain isn't bending over and asking to be spanked like a dog anymore
Dyslectic Geneticist Creates New Species
DR. Dumbshitski of Genome Society tried to emulate success of sheep-pig which tastes like pork but grows wool. However, the pig-sheep he developed is hairless, has a curly tail and tastes like crap.
Food Fight in School Cafeteria Escalates
Servers at Obama Elementary served cheese sandwiches in response to food fight to no avail. Now students must read 12,567 page Health Care Bill in order to be served.
Wayward Pussy Banned From all Pubs in UK
High court in UK upheld ruling of 'loose' woman banned from any establishment selling booze. If anyone has seen her please contact our US editors immediately we want her back home straightaway.
Children Watching Too Much Television
World Health Organization states that children under the age of three years old are prone to Attention Deficit Disorder if they…uh…if they….uh…well whatever they said don't do it.
Danny Glover Arrest Update
Famous actor took a union bullet for the French today in a protest against the Suit Company Sodexo. Claims the deplorable conditions of working 40 hours a week are inhuman.
Christina Applegate Engagement
Spoof writer Ti Cuff officially issues day of mourning on the announcement that Christina is no longer a free woman. Such pain and suffering has not occurred since Jessica Alba tied the noose knot.
Eight Grader Aces Spelling Bee
Brainiac Jedd Nooman won the world championship spelling contest and a 100,000 scholarship for correctly spelling the 'Iceland glacier volcano' question: Eyjafjallajokull
Alex Reid Gets Starring Role
The producers of the smash hit 'Kick Ass' have signed Alex Reid to play in the sequel about life as a celebrity husband. Film is titled 'Kicked Ass'.
Obama Legacy Watch
Obama announces his plan to reform the derivative market. Hires Mr. Peabody and Sherman to take the way-back machine and stop Bill Clinton from allowing derivatives in the first place.
Obama Legacy Watch
Obama announces New Deal adjusted for inflation. FDR put America to work by having one guy digging a ditch and another fill it back in. Obama plans same concept with tear-rebuild of foreclosed houses
Latest Obama Math Confusion
By eliminating NASA Moon landing plan and Mars expedition Obama's regime claims over 2,500 jobs will be created. These must be additional clerks added at the unemployment office.
Meteor Shower Responsible for Judge Crabby's Stupidity
Life partner for Wis. District Judge Crabby claims fireball that nearly destroyed their love nest encouraged her to declare Prayer Day unconstitutional. 'If God really existed we would be dead'.
New age definitions
Definition of the world's laziest man is one that meets and marries a pregnant woman.
Katie Price Pregnancy Update
Katie announces she will call her new son Handsome Stranger; named after the real father
Primark Pulls Boys Swim Trunks Off Shelves
In addition to the seven year old girls padded bras Primark is pulling the companion 'sausage stuffed' boys trunks from shelves citing fair is fair in the sandbox.
NHS Declares Recall on Organs
Any patient receiving a transplanted organ in the past six months must return it to the hospital it was received in order to comply with the donors' wishes. NHS apologizes for the inconvenience.
Polish Plane Crash Investigation
The tragic death of Lech Kaczynski in Russian airplane reveals mechanical flaw in the design. Not only were the hamsters that run the turbines malnourished but the rubber band was made in China
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