Showing snippets written by Bill Licks.
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Simon Cowell at Grand National to promote new series of Britain's Got Talent
He spent the day dressed as a race marshall and was spotted by Beecher's Brook on the second lap of the race...
Flagging a dead horse
Cockney Curb Crawling guide to Yorkshire says 'The Brass Doors in Bradford are very tasty'
Local man Stephen Griffiths agrees they are the tastiest hookers in Britain
Dyslexic Crossbow Cannibal takes on 80's cereal advert catchphrase challenge..... and succeeds
Shreaded Whores - Bet You Can't Eat More Than Three
Crossbow Cannibal releases new book....
Shoots, Eats and Leaves : The Zero Tolerance Guide to Prostitution
I like Andrex Quilted toilet rolls and I like Charmin Ultra Soft. But which one's best?
There's only one way to find out....
Portsmouth FC announce new owner.
Avram Grant celebrates by putting on his best suit and splashing out on a new Thai.
A record 65 million quid paid for Sculpture
He'll go straight into the Manchester City team for the away trip to Hull on Saturday.
Simon Cowell too ill to judge Britains got talent
An irritating pain in the arse and a dribbling prick..... are left to watch the auditions on their own.
Egypt Thurs, Yemen Fri... There's a different destination everyday on your Middle East cruise of a lifetime.
Obama cancels Moon return project
He's a big fan of the BAFTA nominated sci-fi classic, starring Sam Rockwell, but the wife and kids wanted to watch Alvin And The Chipmunks 2 instead.
Jigsaw killer admits it's not the first victim
He previously took a sledge hammer to a Rubik's cube when he couldn't solve that either.
'Is it a pelanty?' asks Chris Waddle
'No it's a PENALTY you fuckwit' scream the viewers.
Andy Murray in tears after Grand Slam
Brutal Roger leaves him red and weeping after 2 hours of punishment.
Cameron promises 'no swingeing cuts' in first year of Tory Government
But he can't promise there won't be any whinging cu*ts in first year of Tory Government.
Bridge in Manchester Collapses
After learning of his ex fiances affair with John Terry, Wayne goes on a bender and passes out.
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