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Showing snippets written by Bill Licks.


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Simon Cowell at Grand National to promote new series of Britain's Got Talent

He spent the day dressed as a race marshall and was spotted by Beecher's Brook on the second lap of the race...

Flagging a dead horse

written by Bill Licks, 10 April 2011
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Cockney Curb Crawling guide to Yorkshire says 'The Brass Doors in Bradford are very tasty'

Local man Stephen Griffiths agrees they are the tastiest hookers in Britain

written by Bill Licks, 30 May 2010
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Dyslexic Crossbow Cannibal takes on 80's cereal advert catchphrase challenge..... and succeeds

Shreaded Whores - Bet You Can't Eat More Than Three

written by Bill Licks, 30 May 2010
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Crossbow Cannibal releases new book....

Shoots, Eats and Leaves : The Zero Tolerance Guide to Prostitution

written by Bill Licks, 30 May 2010
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I like Andrex Quilted toilet rolls and I like Charmin Ultra Soft. But which one's best?

There's only one way to find out....

SHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITE

written by Bill Licks, 06 February 2010
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Portsmouth FC announce new owner.

Avram Grant celebrates by putting on his best suit and splashing out on a new Thai.

written by Bill Licks, 04 February 2010
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A record 65 million quid paid for Sculpture

He'll go straight into the Manchester City team for the away trip to Hull on Saturday.

written by Bill Licks, 03 February 2010
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Simon Cowell too ill to judge Britains got talent

An irritating pain in the arse and a dribbling prick..... are left to watch the auditions on their own.

written by Bill Licks, 03 February 2010
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Jordan Weds

Egypt Thurs, Yemen Fri... There's a different destination everyday on your Middle East cruise of a lifetime.

written by Bill Licks, 03 February 2010
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Obama cancels Moon return project

He's a big fan of the BAFTA nominated sci-fi classic, starring Sam Rockwell, but the wife and kids wanted to watch Alvin And The Chipmunks 2 instead.

written by Bill Licks, 01 February 2010
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Jigsaw killer admits it's not the first victim

He previously took a sledge hammer to a Rubik's cube when he couldn't solve that either.

written by Bill Licks, 01 February 2010
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'Is it a pelanty?' asks Chris Waddle

'No it's a PENALTY you fuckwit' scream the viewers.

written by Bill Licks, 01 February 2010
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Andy Murray in tears after Grand Slam

Brutal Roger leaves him red and weeping after 2 hours of punishment.

written by Bill Licks, 31 January 2010
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Cameron promises 'no swingeing cuts' in first year of Tory Government

But he can't promise there won't be any whinging cu*ts in first year of Tory Government.

written by Bill Licks, 31 January 2010
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Bridge in Manchester Collapses

After learning of his ex fiances affair with John Terry, Wayne goes on a bender and passes out.

written by Bill Licks, 31 January 2010
Showing page 1 (of 1 pages)


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