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16 Members of "Living Chessboard Theater" Dead in Apparent Mass Suicide

Members left collective suicide note which recorded their agony with the declaration, "We were just pawns".

written by Agatha Bloom, 05 August 2009
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God Orders Contents "Shaken, Not Stirred"

Continental Airlines flight 128 happy to oblige.

written by Agatha Bloom, 05 August 2009
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Adam Lambert Withdraws Threat to "Suck Economy Dry"

Upon learning that "economy" is NOT the name of a well-publicized homosexual Egyptian man, Adam Lambert has withdrawn his threat to "suck it dry".

written by Agatha Bloom, 04 August 2009
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US Economy past expiration date

Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke is in hot water after being accused of ignoring the expiration date of the USD in the Mayan Long Form Calendar. He said: "We thought it was more of a suggestion".

written by Agatha Bloom, 03 August 2009
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