Spoof Snippets
Showing snippets written by Gail Farrelly.
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48 Million Americans Tuned in to Watch Obama's Speech on Wednesday
Within five minutes, 47.9 million had tuned out, giving their attention instead to texting or playing video games.
U. S. Senate Lets Federal Reserve Chairman Bernanke Keep His Job
One Senator shrugged and said, "We had no choice. With the unemployment rate so high, how could we add one more person to the ranks of the jobless?"
Astronomer Says Aliens May Not Be Friendly
Okay then, let's not ask them to be our friends on Facebook.
What's in a Name?
NASA says its Mars Rover will no longer rove. It will stay in one place.
Reports Say NASA's New Space Suit is Quite Slimming
Several celebrities will be wearing them to the Oscars award ceremony.
Female Bowler Wins on Men's Tour
A male chauvinist complains, "They've taken over bars, the office and outer space. I just knew the bowling tour would be next."
In the U.S., Truckers and Bus Drivers Are No Longer Allowed to Text While Driving
Others can continue to text while driving and cause as many accidents as they want.
To Split or Not to Split...
...That is the question, according to Brangelina.
Pernell Roberts, Adam Cartwright of "Bonanza," Dies
There's a buzz in the afterlife. Hop Sing, Cartwright cook, orders Chinese takeout for reunion dinner.
Jan. 27 Date Eagerly Awaited in the U.S.
You betcha it's because of Apple's long-awaited announcement of its latest creation and NOT because of Obama's State of the Union address.
I see London, I see France . . .
. . . I see Venus Williams' underpants.
In Middle of Air Flight, Passenger Tries to Open Plane Door
Subdued by fellow passengers, he was heard to scream, "Avon Calling."
Pope Says Church Should Use Many Options of New Technology to Spread Gospel
"Be my friend or burn in hell," he announces on Facebook.
White House Is Sure that Federal Reserve Chairman Bernanke Will Be Reconfirmed
Just as sure as it was that Democrat Martha Coakley would be elected MA Senator.
Bristol Palin Now Says Pre-marital Sex is a No-No
Um. . . What's that old saying about closing the barn door after the cows have escaped?
Over a million Lbs. of Salami Recalled for Possible Contamination
Super Bowl sandwiches put on hold.
Rep. Barney Frank Thinks Two Mortgage-Finance Giants should be abolished
"Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac just gotta go," he said. "This is the age of same-sex couples."
Little Green Martians Invade Indianapolis Airspace and Leave Skywritten Message
"Go Jets!"
Research shows Human COULD Run 40 MPH
Wait a minute. Already Conan O'Brien is running faster than that -- away from NBC.
Contents of First Live Tweet from Outer Space Revealed
"Got milk?"
It's a bird, It's a Plane. . .
. . . No. It's the first live tweet from outer space!
Spencer Pratt Says He's Not in Charge of Wife Heidi's Body
Right. That would be -- her plastic surgeon!
Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke Tries to Hang Onto His Job
"But I'm Time Magazine's Person of the Year," he protests. "Good, then work for them," a non-admirer suggests.
Who Will Protect Earth from Killer Asteroids?
A NASA spokesman says, "We're from the government, and we're here to help . . . ."
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