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Monet for Old Rope

The BBC has revealed that impressionist Claude Monet could do Frank Spencer and Bruce Forsyth so well, that he would often overdub them on radio appearances.

written by Candice Hitler, 09 October 2007
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Phone-in Scandal

If you think the BBC should cancel all phone in votes text YES to 27777 or NO to 56777. All profits will go towards a hoverpack for the Director General.

written by Candice Hitler, 09 October 2007
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Double Freak

The world's only human sized midget was revealed today at london's Leicester Square. The crowd went mild with anticipation.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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Brand Named

Jo Brand is officially human, scientists discovered today after years of extensive testing.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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Inbread

13 out of 12 bakers failed maths.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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International Weather Forecast

Temperature today will remain at a constant 2-27 degrees.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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Beagle 3 plans unveiled

Britain hopes to have another non-communicating dustbin lid on Mars by 2010.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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Going, going, gone

David Dickinson was accidentally sold for 250 pounds today after a mix up in an auction room whilst filming.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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Stealth Tax

Anybody found hiding in shadows or creeping quietly will be ordered to pay fifteen pounds as of today.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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Space Catastrophe

Apparently the Dogstar has exploded. Luckily it's not Sirius.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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David Cameron's recent weight loss

Maybe he hasn't 'eton' all the pies.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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Controversy In China

The Chinese government is dealing with over-population by shooting all old people at birth.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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Time Team

Time Team are still investigating why people buried their houses in times gone by. More info to follow.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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Cruel but Fair

3 people arrested for running underground 'ugly person' baiting ring. These illegal contests are known as 'Speed Dating'. If you have any information, or you're single and lonely, call 08764 767683525254 85 4384 3784

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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Number Crunching

Recent polls suggest that faith in statistics has fallen by 16%.

written by Candice Hitler, 08 October 2007
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