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Premier League start threatened by strike.
A strike by helicopter drivers on the minimum wage could force the delay of the first games of the multi-billion pound Premier League.
Comedy website advertiser offers tips on getting MBE and OBE
First tip: Write less spoof jokes about the Royal Family.
Half-carb bread goes on sale at middle class supermarket
Its only got half the slices.
Skin condition may force Cara Delevinge to quit
Quit what? Does she actually do anything, apart from appear in the newspapers joined at the hip to Rita Ora?
Youtube clips could be given age ratings to shield children
Good idea. Some of those cartoons are far too violent...
Shop assistant says Oprah Winfrey can't afford 25k handbag
Messager to Oprah: Please visit my ebay page, all the handbags are £25,000 this weekend only with free delivery and you can pay by paypal, cash or credit card...
Royal Baby name confirmed as George Alexander Louis
Isn't that the guy who reads the football results?
Killer put photo of wife's body on facebook
Police arrested him before he could upload to twitter, instagram and Craiglist.
Real Madrid step up the chase for Gareth Bale
A spokesman for the La Liga Club today confirmed that Real Madrid will formally change their name to Rhyl Madrid in an attempt to make the Welsh footballer feel at home in Spain.
Flash floods in West Yorkshire
No need to show off. Floods would have been enough.
Kate Middleton lets slip about royal baby...
When given a teddy bear as a present, kate said thanks I'll take that for my d...
So thats it then, the royal baby will be called DARREN!
Charles Saatchi never laid a finger on me, says ex-wife
No statement yet from another ex, Rihanna.
Britain slightly less racist than before says survey
With voters at the local elections switching from BNP to UKIP, the UK racist index dropped from 5% to 3% this week.
Minor scuffles at Thatcher protest in Trafalgar Square
It's what she would have wanted.
* Or was it miner scuffles?
Rolling Stones confirmed for Glastonberry
The gigs not till the summer - lets hope they make it!
Prince Harry to be new face of TV Burp.
Producers loved his friendly style when in Africa for Comic Relief and are keen on the continuity of the name 'Harry'.
New Pope to be decided
Cardinals down to shortlist of Harry Redknapp, Sylvio Berlusconi, Jose Mourinho, David Beckham and Mario Balotelli.
Lib Dems confident of victory in Rome by-election
Hell, forget the groping claims and speeding points - their on a roll!
Rooneys going nowhere says Ferguson
"He's locked in by basement" said the Scot
First day of Test match between New Zealand and England washout
Neer knew there were so many Man United fans in Dunedin.
Justin Bieber to receive counselling
Following a traumatic week in London where he turned up 2 hours late for a gig, was rushed to hospital & threatened a paparazzi, management are to have JB counselled by Britney Spears & Lindsay Lohan
The Times wins newspaper of the year
The actual newspaper of the year, not jut sub-category for phone or email hacking by a Murdoch newspaper.
Carlos Tevez arrested!
Accused of impersonating a footballer. And a supermodel.
Justin Bieber rushed to hospital after breathing problems
Shame the ambulance didn't turn up two hours late - see how he likes it!
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