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Sheridan not guilty of sexy ad
News of World private ad "Bi-Celtic swinger seeks transsexual leprechaun for nasal sex" not Tommy Sheridan.
Magi: Cheap repairs for cash in hand
Newly discovered scriptures indicate that the "Three Wise men from the East" were really Polish building workers looking for work repairing mangers and stables.
Where is Santa?
Anxiety mounts over whether Santa really lives in the Arctic. Observers fear he may be bipolar.
Cameron says AWAY WITH THE MANGER!
Crisis for the Nativity. David Cameron says creche is a tax burden and should be closed down. Holy Manger to be bulldozed to make way for high street banks.
Poop on the BBC
His Arseholiness the Poop's message on BBC's Thought of the Day tells priests this is the time for children, not male prostitutes. In case he didn't have a thought that day it was recorded in advance.
Lukashenko the Magnanimous
Belarus: the 7 other candidates for Presidency have been arrested and face imprisonment. The dictator Lukashenko promises he will beat to death the 21% of electorate who didn't vote for him.
Cher in trouble with French unions
After Burlesque, Cher is facing trouble on her French tour as protesters against the reduction of the age of retirement blockade her concerts saying they are nothing but cheap government propaganda.
No more Mary Poppins?
Childrens'Xmas TV may be be ruined this year after a close-up inspection of an up-skirt shot of Mary Poppins flying shows that she is a trany.
Iran attacts Assange
Iranian Pres. Ahmadinerjacket denounces Wikileaks as a "Hindu-Jewish plot," and warns Australia that it is well within reach of Persian missiles.
Demi's sex tape. Miley Cyrus speaks out
Miley Cyrus is said to be furious at being upstaged by Demi Lovato sex tapes. She says she will now do her own live webcam with Liam
Sandra Bullock and Demi Lovato
Sandra Bullock denies that she and Jesse James make a guest appearance in Demi Lovato's sex tapes. But she says she will continue with her plans to adopt Justin Bieber
Demi's uncle contacts Cosa Nostra
The Lovato clan is said to have contacted the New York families and taken out a contract with Rocco the Psycho to hunt down the source of rumored sex tapes.
The Governor of Arizona, Jan Brewer, has today called on his followers to join the campaign to exonerate Vlad The Impaler.
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