Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Julian Shure.Show all snippets.
Pete Doherty appears in court charged with cocaine
The Libertines front man, Pete Doherty, later appears in McDonald's fired up with crack.
Snow causes travel chaos
Google ramps up anti-piracy measures
Google goes after pirates, their 1000 man strong battleship was seen off the coast of Somalia.
Jordon thinks wikileak is buzzword for loo
Jordon tweets "FML OMG WTF i need 2 have a wikileak!"
Joe McElderry holds on to Queen
X FACTOR winner Joe McElderry was so nervous when he spoke to the Queen he called her your Royal Highness, rather than your Majesty, when he shook her hand he was so petrified he couldn't let go.
UK MPs call drunk limit
UK MPs call for drink-drive limit to be reduced to almost zero, 0.3 mph.
Ahmajinedad cancels trip
Ahmajinedad cancels visit to Saudi Arabia, because of an ongoing head problem. The Iranian President flew to New York for an operation at the Presbyterian Hospital, but was quickly air lifted to Miami
Turkey blames Israel for WikiLeaks, Cockatoo blames Desmond Tutu.
WikiLeaks pinpoints Assange
Julian Assange's hiding location to be revealed in the next WikiLeak disclosure, according to WikiLeaks.
Abdullah tells tale
In a new Wikileaks revelation Saudi King Abdullah sent this message to the US 'I've got the neck you've got the knife, everyone else can have the tail.'
Students laugh over Cameron slip
David Cameron cut himself, slipping on Ice. A group of Students were seen laughing at him.
written by Julian Shure, 01 December 2010
Wikileaks Royal family names
Wikileaks coins Royal names! 'The Dinner lady'-Queen 'That Old Bag'-Camilla 'The Alcoholic Prince'-Charles 'Dirty old man'-Philip 'Cedric'-Harry 'King Arthur?'-William.
written by Julian Shure, 01 December 2010
Charles likes Chum
'The Alcoholic Prince' is hooked on pedigree chum. King Charles Spaniel wins Crufts in 66 Wikileaks.
written by Julian Shure, 30 November 2010
Iran Stands Shoulder to Shoulder with USA
In a broadcasted message today on Iranian TV Ahmajinedad said "Iran has no greater ally than the USA on the war on wikileaks, other than, maybe, Saudi Arabia?"
written by Julian Shure, 29 November 2010
Harry's Plan comes together
William and Kate set the date, the date 66 years to the day that Hitler got married to Eva Braun. Harry celebrated by inviting William to a night of ceremony, where he asked him for the first born.
Fearless mice on the increase
A study was taken on mice to see how fearful they were, using a cat, 3 out of 10 weren't fearful, but they were the three blind mice.
Fry shocks with new book 'How to keep your Woman.'
Stephen Fry reveals to men what women really want, from a first hand experience he touches on subjects about tampons to knitting. Fry quotes 'if you really want to keep her, get yourself castrated!'
Cats with whiskers are more successful
A study taken on cats showed 80% that preferred to have whiskers could manoeuvre in the dark.
Bin Laden takes to North Korea
Osama Bin Laden was spotted on the North Korean border. He was seen desperately trying to tap misleading, inciting, false flag messages with a cheap morse code kit.
North Korea shows its love for Kim Jong-il
Kim waves at the same fans he waved at in 2001, the hysterical fans scream back, "I love you Kim!" The fans were dressed the same, but looking as young and supportive as they were in the 2001 video.
Bears on the loose!
Three armed bears are on the loose. The public has been warned not to shoot at them, but to phone Miss Locks from The Extra limbed Animal foundation.
written by Julian Shure, 27 November 2010
Vatican drops Glitter
Pope chooses theme song, Gary Glitters 'I'm The Leader Of The Gang' to appeal to younger members, the Vatican has dropped this for the 'Back Street Boys' down to controversy.
written by Julian Shure, 26 November 2010
Stephen Fry launches new book tomorrow
Stephen launches new book in Piccadilly Circus. 100 frustrated females camp outside to have the first signed copy. Germaine Greer was seen in a balaclava. The book is titled 'Sex after Menopause'
written by Julian Shure, 10 November 2010
David Cameron buzzes ahead with plan
David Cameron has gone ahead with his controversial plan to cut benefits. When asked what's next, he said, "state pensions, the NHS and coke," whilst trying to clear his nose.
written by Julian Shure, 08 November 2010