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Global Warming Explained

When Johnny Prescott jumps into his pool, the resultant shock waves cause the sea level to rise and flood Belgium. But it's another Champs. League spot for Everton anyway..

written by masterchev, 10 October 2010
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Classified Ad #1

For Sale: Copies of the Script Album, and clearly not any tiny Romanian immigrants wrapped in a box. Honest. Send details for N. Sarkozy. £10 ono

written by masterchev, 08 October 2010
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Cameron to release Sequel to Avatar

Davey C. set to release Avatar II. Location of Middlesborough set to double as the primitive dwellings. Cameron: "No scene changes required. It's perfect for the film!"

written by masterchev, 06 October 2010
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Tiger Woods 11 to feature massive revamp

Game set to feature USA actually winning the Ryder Cup rather than losing it to the Europeans.

written by masterchev, 06 October 2010
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Terror Alert System Changes

Rather than colours, terror scale measured by politicans. Medium Crisis is Nick Clegg. Big Crisis Gordon Brown. Huge crisis John Prescott. Safe doesn't exist.

written by masterchev, 05 October 2010
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Europe win Ryder Cup

Because sometimes, world wars don't come the same if you're playing golf.

written by masterchev, 04 October 2010
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Obstacles on the Sixth Hole

This hole is the most Welsh in the Ryder Cup: no fairway; sheep running riot and the flag replaced with rugby posts. Will need 12 shots (more than Wales will get in Euro 2012)

written by masterchev, 01 October 2010
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Obstacles on the Fifth Hole

This short par 3 is easily managable if you hit the green... if Lady Gaga didn't decide to dress up specifically for the event. And avoid Victoria Beckham with her new hat: that's not the flag.

written by masterchev, 01 October 2010
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Obstacles on the Fourth Hole

The fourth hole is covered with Obama enthusiasts. Recommended you take a bi. I mean a by.

written by masterchev, 01 October 2010
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Obstacles on the Third Hole

The third hole contains a variety of bunkers and thick patches of grass. Ideal for you Mr. Woods if you get the urge to find Nigella Lawson or Kate Thornton.

written by masterchev, 01 October 2010
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Obstacles on the Second Hole

The second hole, a Dog Leg Left, literally has a dog leg left on the playing field. Thought to be from nearby dumpster.

written by masterchev, 01 October 2010
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Obstacles on the First Hole. (1 of 18)

The first hole is 250 yards, and is littered with homeless Romanian people who were kicked out of France

written by masterchev, 01 October 2010
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Sarkozy opens "France World"

People must use "Park Tickets" to enter after Nicolas pissed off the EU.

written by masterchev, 01 October 2010
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Commonwealth hires monkeys as security

Fernando Torres, Wayne Rooney and Ashley Cole "delighted to be doing something productive"

written by masterchev, 29 September 2010
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Cyrus gets "Big Break"

Teen "sensation" Miley Cyrus was recently rewarded for years of ruining kids imaginations with a Burger King commercial. Miley "gutted" she's an extra.

written by masterchev, 27 September 2010
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Gordon Brown Stig Quote 3

Some people say that whenever he sees a pound coin on the street, he throws it down the drain to join the British treasury.

written by masterchev, 27 September 2010
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BBC aren't making massive budget cuts...

They said this morning as they announced that Chris Moyles and Jonathan Ross had been replaced by two guys from university.

written by masterchev, 27 September 2010
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Yakubu seen eating 7 Big Macs

Fans expect either a goal romp or a mini stroke.

written by masterchev, 26 September 2010
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Gordon Brown Stig quote No2

Some say that when he smiles, a child in London receives triple homework for coming to lessons.

written by masterchev, 25 September 2010
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Bend it like Beckham

Former England Captain's private life comes out after encounter with paps. Well it's a lot more detailed than his C.V. ever could be.

written by masterchev, 23 September 2010
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Woman takes on bear... and wins

Woman attacks bear with courgette. RSPCA searching for her after they settled their other annual case of "dog in a dumpster"

written by masterchev, 23 September 2010
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England Team Given Deli Go Ahead

Following speculation Capello won't let them eat at all to avenge losses at South Africa.

written by masterchev, 23 September 2010
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Gordon Brown Stig quotes No1

Some people say that when he fills up his car, he contemplates whether he's cheating on America.

written by masterchev, 23 September 2010
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George Bush stars in next season of Glee

Apparently, producers were looking for someone who'd been out of touch with the world for the past ten years.

written by masterchev, 22 September 2010
Showing page 2 (of 3 pages)


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