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Republicans Declare Economic Crisis "Over"
Reince Priebus, chairman of the Republican National Committee, declared the US economic crisis "over" today.
President Obama comes out: 'I'm proud to be a Tranny'
President Barack Obama announced today that he is transgender, confirming what many Republicans have suspected for years.
Obama to deploy 3,000 doctors to combat ISIL
The United States announced on Tuesday it will send 3,000 doctors to help combat the Islamic terrorist group, ISIL, as part of a ramped-up plan, including a major deployment in Syria.
President Obama Announces Strategy To Combat ISIL
President Barack Obama announced his specific plans today to combat the Islamic State militant group. He reiterated that the United States would never comment on strategy, tactics or timetables.
Toddler caught trying to break into White House
A toddler squeezed his way through the fence of the White House late Thursday night. The boy was just waterboarded, changed, fed and returned to his parents.
Massive cleanup after tropical storm Arthur misses New York
New York City residents mopped up Saturday after tropical storm Arthur missed New York, and doused cable news networks' celebrations.
President Obama Admits to Getting Payday Loans
A few days after Joe Biden one-upped 'dead broke' Hillary Clinton, Obama trumped them both by admitting that he visits a payday loan center at least twice a month.
UN: "USA refugee figure passes 150 million for first time"
UN spokesperson, Lotta Boolsheet, issued a report today stating that the number of US citizens forced to leave their homes has exceeded 150 million for the first time since Jimmy Carter was president.
Israel PM announces alliance with Al Qaida and Hezbollah
Israel Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu, announced today that Israel will enter an alliance with Hezbollah and Al Qaida to fight the United States and Iran.
Michael Sam traded to Packers
In an incredibly ironic twist, openly gay football player, Michael Sam, was traded by the St. Louis Rams to the Greenbay Packers.
Donald Sterling condemns North Korea's Obama 'monkey' insult
LA Clippers owner, Donald Sterling has condemned descriptions in North Korean state media of President Obama as a "crossbreed" and a "wicked black monkey".
Boston police destroy two poodles
Boston Metropolitan Police have blown up two unattended poodles found near the Boston Marathon's finish line.
Supreme Court recognizes Gays as 'third gender'
In a landmark judgment, the Supreme Court on Tuesday created the "third gender" status for gays. Earlier, they were forced to write male or female as their gender.
White House Bans "Doing It" in the Lincoln Bedroom
President Barack Obama has issued a statement, condemning the practice and has banned anyone from "doing it" in the Lincoln bedroom.
Panic spreads as magnitude-1.9 quake hits Manhattan
New York City's Mayor, Bill de Blasio, says that the stress toll has risen to more than 239,093 from a powerful magnitude-1.9 earthquake that struck off Manhattan earlier today.
Senate Democrats Put Themselves on Endangered Species List
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid introduced a bill in the US Senate this morning, assigning Democrats to the Endangered Species List.
Nevada to Lower Drinking Age to 12
Nevada Governor, Brian Sandoval, announced today that Nevada will lower the legal drinking age in Nevada from 21 to 12.
PBS bans 'upskirt' photos, closes Peeping Puppet loophole
PBS has finally banned puppets from secretly taking pictures or video under another person's clothing.
Pope Drops C-Bomb
Pope Francis droped the C-Bomb, when questioned by female reporter about F-Bomb
U.S. To Boycott Paralympics in Protest Over Oscar Pistorius Trial
US Presidential Spokesman, Jay Carney, announced today that the USA will boycott the Sochi Paralympics in protest over the trial of Oscar Pistorius, himself a paraplegic.
President Obama Declares War on Winter
President Obama declared war on winter this morning after Washington DC was hit with another terrible snow storm, dropping nearly four inches of snow on the capital city.
USA Womens' Curling Team Concedes 2018 Olympics
In an unprecedented move, the USA Womens' Curling Team has conceded the 2018 Olympics.
Obama Launches WebCam Program for the Disadvantaged
President Barack Obama on Thursday launched a public program to provide webcams to African-American and Latino young men and boys.
Duck Dynasty star dies of duck bite
Phil Robertson has died of a duck bite after refusing to seek medical attention after a duck bit his left testicle during the taping of a Duck Dynasty episode.
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