Showing snippets written by tlmedia.
Show all snippets.
Secret Details Of Clinton's North Korean Success
Monica Lewinsky was also on the trip. She made Kim Jung-Il so happy he'd give the US all of his nukes. Said Clinton,"He, he, that good ole girl is somthin', she really knows how to suck up to anyone."
What's That Glued Penis Guy's Name...
..."Did you say 'Seman'...oh come on now. What's that, 'Seaman'...really can't be, you're pulling my leg...oh 'Zieman', that's better, but it's German for 'Seman.' Poor guy just can't get a break!"
Obama Orders Conversational Latin Taught In All Schools
"Look," said Mr. Obama," with Latinos swelling the ranks of our population, it's only fair we learn how to talk with them. When told they speak Spanish not Latin Obama said, Is there a difference?"
Guinness Book Names Funniest Family Name In America
It belongs to Miriam and Homer Nuckenfutz of Sheeit, Iowa. They own the Nuckenfutz Ace Hardware Store, in town. Their slogan, "If We Don't Have It You Are Nuckenfutz."
Harris Poll On Procrastination A Disappointment
Of the 10 million people who requested to be included in the survey, only 5% have responded.
Tough Contest Rules In A Recession
"Valid where not prohibited, Limit 0 per customer
I'm Like So Unemployed, Ya Know
"Oooh, I can't get like a job, like ya know. Hey, like I have an idea, ya know. There's like this TV show, 'American Idle' & I could win like a million bucks. Oooh, like I'm so smart<p>
My Wife Just Jumped To Her Death...
And I'm so in grief...sob...sob...It was such a beautiful Rolex I'd just given her. If I knew, I'd bought a Timex. People can be so unappreciative. I'll get her and skip her funeral. Revenge is sweet
Pigs Can Fly
So what the big hubbub about "Swine Flew?"
Obama Breaks Another Law
I can't believe he'd have a couple of beers with the Harvard Prof. and the cop. Can't he read signs? "No alcoholic beverages allowed on the White House lawn. Oh...the arrogance of power!!!
The True Defination Of "Teutonic"
Too much Schweppes, not enough gin!
I Support The Youth In Asia. Yes I Do!
"Oh, did you say EUTHANASIA, never mind!
I Just Bought My My First Computer...
...and the box said there was a "mouse" inside. "Mouse? I don't want a rodent in my new PC," so a put some dCon inside. Haven't seen one yet! Hey, don't mess around with a genius!
Another Energy Saving Tip From "Dr. Green."
When washing dishes do a lot of small loads. Your machine will clean them in seconds, saving tons of water....Dr. Elmer Green, Dir. of Conservation, Acme Water Company. "You Save, We Make More Money."
If You Ever Come To Judas, NC.....
...don't trust a soul and they all play banjos.
I Have A Marriage Commitment Problem, And....
I was once married for 3 minutes so I had an attorney standing behind the pastor....no dummy here.
My Computer Weighed 175 Pounds...Until
I took it to my PC tech and he was really puzzled until he realized I has more than 23 million undeleted email messages.
Hey, mail can be heavy, so this is a word to the wise!
Obama Inducted Into "Guinesses Book Of World Records"
As the "Most Deluded Man In The World" for actually believing his Health Care Reform package could ever become a reality.
I Went To A New Psychiatrist.....
....Because I thought I was paranoid. "Nope," he said, "People really hate you and so do I." I bet all of you out there in "Spoofland" do too. Hey, I know where you live and I'll get you! See ya soon!
Woman Suing Employer For Sexual Harassement; Success In Doubt.
...She's a hooker!
A Tasty House Warming Treat
Wrap cat turds in coconut. It's a munchie the new homeowners will never forget
Scam Goes Terribly Wrong
(AP)Rome-An unidentified man shot his wife to death and then killed himself. The couple thought they could collect huge insurance settlements from large policies they held. Police say the plot failed.
Sarah Palin Endorses Waterboarding, Changes Mind
"Waterboarding is a great sport. Nothing wrong with riding the waves. We do it in Hawaii & California all the time." When told it was torture she said, "Never mind, I have a salmon to catch, ya know."
New Chinese Restaurant Opens, And....
The food is delicious and great service, but because the chef is 1/2 Chinese and 1/2 German you get a "craving for power" in 2 hours.
Send To A Friend
Send this site to a friend!
RSS & Feeds
The Spoof is proud to present all its stories as RSS Feeds.
Get Spoof News in your email inbox!