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Showing snippets written by Nate John Won.


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Fridge-magnet fury

The WHO claim that excessive use of fridge-magnets, can induce a magnetic effect on stored consumables.

written by Nate John Won, 05 August 2012
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Jesus Christ Superstar reject tells all

Performer Joshua Cohen today broke his silence about his rejection from the first round of TV's 'Superstar'. 'They said I looked too Jewish,' he claims.

written by Nate John Won, 05 August 2012
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Hawkins poses the ultimate question for mankind

At a Conference today, Prof. Dickie Hawkins posed a conundrum regarding the existence of God. 'If he's in control of everything,' he said, 'how is it that he allows a smug egotist like me to evolve?'

written by Nate John Won, 05 August 2012
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That natural look

The food biotech company Agri-corps have recently developed a range of mis-shapen vegetables, to meet with the demand for a natural look for food.

written by Nate John Won, 05 August 2012
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Green, Black and Blues

Warner movies reveal that the rugged look for Sirius Black in the Harry Potter film franchise was based upon the stylings of 1960s Fleetwood Mac blues frontman Peter Green.

written by Nate John Won, 05 August 2012
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A bee in the bonnet?

Shocking confessions were signed by several prominent car manufacturers today, stating that they had all captured honey-bees and used their skins to create pollen filters for air-conditioning units.

written by Nate John Won, 03 August 2012
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Automated Archers in Ambridge

The BBC have confirmed that the voices of several actors from The Archers are in fact generated by computers. 'It's a great pity,' report the BBC, 'but actors are getting more expensive to hire.

written by Nate John Won, 03 August 2012
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Nutty rodents, ratty students

At Whackinghamshire University, several students were set upon by gangs of grey squirrels and robbed of their crisps and nuts. Security guards have now been posted at the student shop.

written by Nate John Won, 03 August 2012
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Mockton hop to it

In an attempt to keep fit and to help the environment, residents of Lancashire village Mockton are bouncing for Britain with a month-long campaign to make use of space hoppers to get to work.

written by Nate John Won, 03 August 2012
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A Torchy Subject

The Olympic Electric Co. have taken offence at the 2012 Olympics Committee's insistence to the use of the existing brand name for the OEC's best-selling hand-held torch: the Olympic Torch.

written by Nate John Won, 03 August 2012
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All cleaned, ghostly-white

Newly-wed Sean O'Corn claims that new marital home is haunted by the ghost of a cleaner. 'It's eerie,' he says, 'I turn around, and everything's been tidied away.' Mrs. O'Corn made no comment.

written by Nate John Won, 02 August 2012
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Better late than never

Shelly the British entry for Olympic Snail racing team has taken the gold medal in a phenomenal finish. The team began this epic challenge back in Beijing, China, in the 2008 games.

written by Nate John Won, 02 August 2012
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Groovy retro-music system unearthed

Billy Booster, grandson of engineer Bertie Bandwyth, recently unearthed an early sound-system in the boot of an old Austin A40 - a record player, with a set of interchangeable jazz 78s. Groovy!"

written by Nate John Won, 02 August 2012
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Three-in-one

With the continuing trend of Christmas items being available from September, Santa Claus is due to switch on the spooky lights this year at the 'North-West' mall, simultaneously setting off fireworks.

written by Nate John Won, 02 August 2012
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Join the club

Fizzy French golfer Jean-Luc Ozade tried to pull a fast one today when he kicked his golf-ball into Hole 18. He claimed the move acceptable since he used his clubbed foot.

written by Nate John Won, 02 August 2012
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Hexidecimal hits for the old micro PCs

The data-loading sounds of 1980s microcomputers have hit the download charts. Old geeks are going crazy over the 'squeal' and 'snore' of games for the BBC, CBM64, and Spectrum48. Robot rock, man!

written by Nate John Won, 01 August 2012
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Sea food - and eat it!

The new seafood chess game Ships Mate! has hit supermarket shelves - this is an edible version of chess with prawns replacing pawns, and muscles, winkles and cockles for knights, bishops and castles.

written by Nate John Won, 01 August 2012
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A girl like Maria

After years of climbing mountains, fording streams, and following every by-way Austrian nun Maria von Trapp has finally found her dream. She is now going to collect every one of her favourite things.

written by Nate John Won, 01 August 2012
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Game for a laugh

Camp comedian Cecil Flowerdew got a nasty shock on 'Celebrity Country Life' this week - "I told the keeper I was game," said Flowerdew, "and he whipped out his 12-bore shotgun. I had to run for it."

written by Nate John Won, 01 August 2012
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New i-Poo

The Phony company have just launched the all new i-Poo which opens up like a lightweight book, and rests on one's lap while sitting on the lavatory. It is compatible with the Phony i-Shop application.

written by Nate John Won, 01 August 2012
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'All White?'

In response to the White party's declaration that the UK is overrun with 'foreigners', the Pre-Anglo-Celtic party suggested that perhaps only the direct descendants of the Beaker Folk should remain.

written by Nate John Won, 01 August 2012
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Hull - and back

Furniture removal man Peter Eyesore had a Narnia moment when he accidentally fell into a wardrobe in his van. His partner then drove off and Peter stepped out of the van in Humberside. What a day!

written by Nate John Won, 01 August 2012
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It's Only Money

The Duchy of Great Albion is to celebrate the end of its economic crisis with an almighty display of fireworks on 31st December 2012. 'We do have standards to uphold' declared a Blue party member.

written by Nate John Won, 29 July 2012
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Misunderstanding over multiple Boxing Day bookings

Ex-heavyweight Rocky Montayne, was set straight regarding the significance of Dec 26th by the WBF. 'I thought Boxing Day would be the best day to book up every venue in London,' claimed Montayne.

written by Nate John Won, 29 July 2012
Showing page 1 (of 4 pages)


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