Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Ben Macnair.
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CD find
Detectives working together with record shops have found the millions of albums sold by Shania Twain, Chris De Burgh, Cliff Richard, Mariah Carey, and Celine Dion in the lost city of Atlantis. Atlantisists were always suspected to have a piss poor taste in music.
written by Ben Macnair, 10 April 2008
Shoe Prices: Update
Following the news that a Centipede in Glamorgan is to complain about the price of shoes to his MP, a Millipede has now poked his nose in saying 'And you think you've got problems?'
written by Ben Macnair, 10 April 2008
Door-nail lives
In a shock revelation that will turn the world of cliche on its head, a living Door nail has been found in the Outer Hebrides.
written by Ben Macnair, 10 April 2008
Shoe Prices
A Centipede in Glamorgan has recently complained about the price of shoes to his MP.
written by Ben Macnair, 10 April 2008
U2, of there
Following news that U2 have signed away digital rights for the next 12 years, or something, they have also signed the Gettysberg Address, and the Magna Carta. They are now worthless, Bono said, cackling.
written by Ben Macnair, 31 March 2008
Bottler's new book
Talentless dullard Paul Burrell's new book 'You won't get it for free' is due out tomorrow. Pre-orders are said to be very slow.
written by Ben Macnair, 09 March 2008
A day in the sun
The editors of the Sun, The Express and The Daily Mail today realised that it is now more than 10 years ago, and it is time to let Princess Di rest in peace.
written by Ben Macnair, 08 March 2008
New Books
Sales of Gillian McKeith's new book 'Going through the motions' have rocketed in the past week. She is said to be flushed with success.
written by Ben Macnair, 28 February 2008
Barrymore to play Milligan; Grayson - C3PO
Following the news that the comedian Spike Milligan is to be portrayed by Michael Barrymore, we can exclusively reveal that Larry 'Shut that door' Grayson is to play the part of a young C3P0 in a new biopic about the early life of the camp protocol droid.
written by Ben Macnair, 22 January 2008
A Team
The Spoof can exclusively reveal that Mr T's name is in fact Herb.
written by Ben Macnair, 03 January 2008
Hogmanay
Pigs in Scotland are under Police protection, in preparation for this year's Hogmanay celebrations.
written by Ben Macnair, 31 December 2007
Hogmanay II
There was confusion in BBC today when it was revealed that Later with Jools Holland is in fact recorded earlier. The Hootenanies that go out on New Year's Eve are in fact recorded on New Year's day, the year before.
written by Ben Macnair, 31 December 2007
Wombling Free
In a bid to crack down on Council overspends, councillors for Wimbledon Common are to sack the lovable beasties known as Wombles, from their rubbish collecting ways.
written by Ben Macnair, 26 December 2007
Charlie Dimmock
TV Gardener Charlie Dimmock is to retire from Television, claiming that keeping up with Alan Titchmarsh is proving too much for her.
written by Ben Macnair, 19 December 2007
Woodworm Christmas Banquet
Chefs at Woodworms R Us have this week recommended Doors as a tasty treat, following last weeks serving suggestions of table and chairs.
written by Ben Macnair, 17 December 2007
Political Shock
A tory Politician has admitted he does not have all of the answers. He is not a quiz master...Loud hoots of laughter were heard from the back bench...
written by Ben Macnair, 17 December 2007
No Lady in Red, please
Middle of the Road philanthropist Chris De Burgh is to play a gig in Iran. A spokesman for the troubled country said: 'Have we not suffered enough?'
written by Ben Macnair, 17 December 2007
No News
In an empty room, nothing happened, but how do we know? That is the conundrum that you have to answer for yourself, reader.
written by Ben Macnair, 17 December 2007
Cat Hair
Cat Hair jackets are the new trend, for Cats, said a spokeman for Cat Hair Magazine.
written by Ben Macnair, 17 December 2007
Cluedo
Professor Plum in Cluedo does not like Plums. He likes Apricots, though.
written by Ben Macnair, 16 December 2007
Shaggy Dog Story
Shaggy, the wispily bearded character from TV documentary Scooby Doo has claimed that he does not like the way that he is portrayed in the programme. 'I am not some idiot whose only friends are two dogs, and three people who find him a nusiance' said the Cartoon nusiance, idiotically.
written by Ben Macnair, 16 December 2007
No more Robbie
Newspapers claim that Take That have closed the door on welcoming Robbie Williams back into the group. Comedian and Actor Robin Williams is more than welcome........
written by Ben Macnair, 16 December 2007
No Link
The Daily Mail has today admitted that nothing in the world is directly linked to its continued existence.
written by Ben Macnair, 16 December 2007
Books................
A man was killed in a library. Police found the suspect, he was booked. The Librarian said Sssssshhhhhhhhhhh, but it was all fine.
written by Ben Macnair, 16 December 2007
Showing page 3 (of 7 pages)