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10#13704#Jack Goff#40946.4589468#1#883009
National Tanning Salon Chain - Going Green
Sun Tan City, a tanning salon chain has installed solar voltaic panels on the roofs of all their salons. A spokesman says, "Now we are truly harnessing the power of the sun in our tanning machines."
10#13704#Jack Goff#40946.0090394#2#198096
The Invisible Man Sues Superman
The Invisible Man is suing Superman after he allegedly burned his clothes of with his laser eyes. The Invisible Man claims to suffer from emotional trauma after being left in public completely naked.
10#13704#Jack Goff#40945.8849421#3#526101
Nascar: DRIVE4COPD 300 - Race Cars To Be Replaced By Turtles
The 120 lap 300 mile race at Daytona is to be held 2/25/2012. Race completion and winner suspected to be announced sometime in 2014. Kyle Busch protested by crying and holding his breath.
10#13704#Jack Goff#40945.8735648#4#259006
Police To Start Using A New Less Than Less Lethal Weapon
Due to accusations of police brutality cops are now equipped with turkey feathers. Tests have shown that criminals if tickled submit to officers because they can't breath through their laughter.
10#13704#Jack Goff#40945.8623843#5#516265
Mentos And Diet Coke - Lockheed Martin Colaboration
F-22s are now going green. They will no longer contribute to climate change because their engines are being replaced with large Coke bottles. To throttle up the pilot releases mentos into the bottle.
10#13704#Jack Goff#40945.8532407#6#339451
Disney To Build A Roller Coaster To Mimic The US National Debt
Disney has hired Stengel Engineering to design a coaster to educate park visitors on the size of the National Debt. Skeptics say the ride won't be any fun being that it only goes and never comes down.
10#9766#Jaggedone#40945.8465162#7#600142
Iran ban The Simpsons!
Iran have banned The Simpsons because they're too western and pornographic, they prefer transmitting hours of live televised prayers from Mecca, it's healthier for the mind!
10#13629#radiogagger#40945.4866204#8#836681
Katy Perry's life may become Hollywood film.
Who will play Russel Brand? Adam Sandler maybe?
10#13629#radiogagger#40945.4838426#9#163243
Supreme Court joins Twitter
No news yet on the Diana Ross court
10#13357#Lyndon#40945.4613773#10#757390
Superbowl XLVI reminds folks that no one can read Roman numerals any more
In a country where XL can only be found on the tag of someone's shirt, another Superbowl came and went with fans everywhere wondering what the hell all those letters after "Superbowl" meant.
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