Early today the Nobel Prize Committee announced that it had made a big mistake telling Barrack Obama that he would be awarded the Peace prize. In reality, the Committee explained, it had voted to award the prize to Malia and Sasha Obama, both more in...
Swiss manufacturer Interim today defended its new nuclear powered ferris wheel against critics who said it was "dangerous" and a poor use of resources.
Interim engineers say competitors are just being "snarky" because the wheel goes "really fast,"...
At a press conference today, Treasury Secy Richard Geitner announced that there has been another setback in the acquisition of a dog by the Obama family.
Leading economists released figures today showing that the average cost of raising a dog from...
At a press conference today Oprah Winfrey thanked Rod Blagojevich for stating that he had thought of naming her to the vacated Senate seat in Illinois.
She said that while she was "flattered," she could really not afford the pay cut that an appoi...
A former literary agent for Paula Dean stated today that upon visiting the food writer, she found her currently living in a small trailer with a microwave oven, a pile of frozen food boxes, and a few empty take out containers.
Embarrassed, Dean tr...
Stymied by utterly flat car sales, Pford Motor Cars announced today that it has inked a deal with Donkin Doughnuts to present the first automatic coffee car.
After an initial programming by the owner, Pford's Special 2009 Coffee Torus model will a...
Frustrated by an inability to choose between a Portuguese Water Dog and a Goldendoodle, and concerned that not selecting a dog from a rescue could generate more criticism from animal rights and rescue groups, AND already criticized by breeders for no...
Actress and musician Brittany Spears' publicists announced today that she shall matriculate to Cambridge University next fall and commence the study of astrophysics.
Remarkably, at a private sitting recently, she achieved much better than average...
Today, SuperHealth Bakery released its new 700,000 grain muffin. CEO Tom Baker said "we have been working on this muffin for years." It has 700,000 different grains, so it took years just to collect them. It has 100,000 times anyone's daily recommend...
Jon Mottentot was meeting with an adjuster today to go through what remained of his parents' Leistercestershire home. For their fiftieth anniversary, he had contracted with an electronics firm to design and install a 4m television in their home.
In a constant effort to augment revenues and to solve a multitude of social problems, New Jersey officials today announced the implementation of a new "Syntax." "The way this works," the Governor proudly explained, "is that anytime some one makes a s...