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Funny story:  First "All-Straight" Saturday TV Show

First "All-Straight" Saturday TV Show

In a bold step, the BBC is going to experiment next Saturday night with an "all-straight" light entertainment show. After years of promoting homo stars, the Director General himself ordered the one-off show to highlight the fact that the Corporation...
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Funny story:  "Fred the Shred" to go on tour

"Fred the Shred" to go on tour

Sir Fred "The Shred" Goodwin, villain of the Royal Bank of Scotland collapse, is to go on a lecture tour of UK, it has been announced. Sir Fred, represented by Cliff Maxford, has lined up a series of 21 dates in British towns throughout June. The...
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Funny story:  "Porkomputer" causes moslem misery

"Porkomputer" causes moslem misery

The marketing of a computer which contains elements made from pork has angered some people in the Moslem community. The Tatyama p-01x has been on sale now for two months, and for reasons which the manufacturer has not revealed, has pork-fat as a...
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Funny story:  Tests show Clarkson is 'juvenile'

Tests show Clarkson is 'juvenile'

Tests on Jeremy Clarkson have revealed the perhaps unsurprising news that he has the brain of an eleven-year-old boy. Whilst he obviously is capable of fully-formed adult thought, doctors believe Clarkson suffers from 'Smart-Gillie Syndrome' whic...
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Funny story:  Tallahassee to get giant Aardvark

Tallahassee to get giant Aardvark

In an effort to boost the local economy, and in moves to rival the "Giant Baboon of Memphis", Tallahassee in Florida is to get it's own 300-foot-long aardvark. The aardvark was native to that part of North America before being wiped out by early sett...
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Funny story:  Jackson concerts now till 2018

Jackson concerts now till 2018

Michael Jackson has added another 300 concerts to his "This is It" 2009 UK tour, to take the total number to 2,900 nights lasting until October 2018. It is estimated that Jackson will be seen by 58 million people on this tour, almost the complete...
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Funny story:  UK paving slabs in euro madness

UK paving slabs in euro madness

In a move expected to cost £18million, EEC commissioners have announced that all Britain's paving slabs will have to be changed as they are all slightly undersized. The standard European regulation size is 45 x 45 centimetres, and the UK's are 40...
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Funny story:  Goody to be mounted and stuffed

Goody to be mounted and stuffed

Bill Oddie, the "unfunny Goody" and bird-watching depressive, is to be stuffed and mounted in a tableux featuring himself on a bike with differend species of birds, announced his agent today. The bearded twitterer has already chosen his final res...
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Funny story:  New homes plans for London

New homes plans for London

Boris Johnson, Mayor of London, has announced a massive building programme of 'prefabs', the post-war temporary housing solution, to allieviate London's chronic housing shortage. The prefabs are already built and are sitting on a site outside Pet...
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Funny story:  In-car microwave "perfectly safe"

In-car microwave "perfectly safe"

The selling of an in-car microwave oven from one of the biggest and best specialist retailer of consumer electronics, was declared "perfectly safe" by a team from a top driving and road safety organisation today. The Top-of-dashboard mounted unit...
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Funny story:  President Blair's first year reviewed

President Blair's first year reviewed

Brussels, April 9th, 2010 - EEC President and Middle East Peace Commisioner Sir Anthony Blair (Lord Blair of Sedgefield), PMF (USA), has had a distinguished first year as first President of the EEC. His brave move in granting amnesty for all asylum-s...
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Funny story:  New ITV show "disgusting"

New ITV show "disgusting"

The new ITV show "Celebrity Food Finders", in which a celebrity has to last a day on food found in bins or the street, is "disgusting" and below even ITV's level, says its chairman. B-lister comedian Joe Pasquale was shown rummaging through dustb...
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Funny story:  New study blurs future for millions

New study blurs future for millions

An exhaustive study carried out by experts from two British Universities over three years has shown that there is now only an 13% happiness difference on the Mallard-Roberts scale, comparing achievement/satisfaction/lifestyle. The respected measu...
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Funny story:  New study shows women talk longer

New study shows women talk longer

A two-year study by experts from the University of Dungeness, Kent, has shown that women talk about 18% more than they did ten years ago, a rise of 40% on the 1970's. The rise is being put down to the increased use of mobile phones, although Profe...
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Funny story:  America and UK in "food exchange" week

America and UK in "food exchange" week

The USA and UK are embarking on a "food exchange week" from today, to help citizens of each understand the other's way of life better. Exhibitions and tastings have been organised all over America and Britain. For example, how many British people...
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Funny story:  Kerry Katona still not ill, doctors say

Kerry Katona still not ill, doctors say

Photographers, journalists and ghoulsish observers keeping a vigil outside Kerry Katona's house (probably in Essex) have had another disappointing night after she appears to be not ill again. The bankrupt has-been 'star' of Iceland ads, an exampl...
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Funny story:  Pound rallies; Brown optimistic

Pound rallies; Brown optimistic

The British Pound rallied in the markets today, rising an impressive 8% against the Borneo wogga bean. There are now 244 wogga to the Pound. The GDP was still disappointing against most "major" currencies, but Gordon Brown was optimistic. Spe...
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Funny story:  "Brown Note" discovery brings relief

"Brown Note" discovery brings relief

The discovery of the perfect "brown note", a low musical note which causes listeners to soil themselves, has brought joy to military leaders. The note, which has been secretly worked on for 10 years, has been perfected by a team from, appropriate...
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Eminent Authority Opines on Hillary's Claim of Impoverishment

"Hillary Clinton claiming to be broke is like King Midas declaring himself to be homeless." M Voltaire

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