In a strange turn of irony, 'Pulp' front man Jarvis Cocker's set was interrupted by the ghost of Michael Jackson moonwalking across the stage - as he sang some dire dirges at Glastonbury today.
Jarvis 18 lbs famously mooned Michael Jackson at the...
Media demon Michael Jackson 50 is dead causing the world media to go into shock. Some tabloids speculate he died to get back into the limelight after the rise of Susan Boyle and the illnesses of Jade Goody, Farah Fawcett and Patrick Swayze. However t...
Micheal Jackson King of pop and the press's pop paedophile has finally kicked the bucket causing the press to be unprepared hence they are using the same hypocritical speech they cobbled together for fellow media demon Jade Goody.
Papers hurriedly...
In a bid not to be taken to court and thrown in the chokey or gaol - BNP leader Nick Griffin; no relation to Peter Griffin, but equally as corpulent has agreed to let all sorts of exotic people into his party, but has refused Russell Brand.
Nick...
After hounding Boyle for weeks and writing some pretty nasty stories about her- that would make the Kray Twins weep. The pernicious UK tabloids have used their power to attribute her exhaustion and temporary breakdown- soley to these facts "She did n...
Britains Got Talent, America's got Talent, X factor, American Idol and all talent shows know to man have banned the singing of the opera choon Nessun Dorma. After complaints from the snooty world of opera.
Nessun Dorma loosely translates into Eng...
Delusional butterface and body Davina McCall, 49 will grace the nations screen yet again for the next twelve weeks on her programme Big hook Nose and Big Brother.
Unlike fellow ageing reality screen presence Amanda Holden, 41 who admittedly did o...
Gordon Brown the puppet Prime Minister of Britain, last night checked into the 'Priory' Hospital for loony celebrities- in an adjoining room to Susan Boyle before he embarked on a week long training session with street dance 'effnik' group 'Diversit...
Former Atomic Kitten songster Kerry Katona,12, will be replacing Susan Boyle on the forth-coming 'Britain's Got Talent Tour'.
Simon Cowell Prime Minister of Britain who was at Downing Street this morning shouting at Gordon Brown in a disapproving...
After her success on BGT, Amanda Holden, 43 has proposed the idea to her friend Simon who seemed mildly interested, yet thoroughly opposed to the idea.
Amanda, 40 who is famous for marrying Les Dennis and turning him into a figure that now resemb...
Piers Morgan Mr La -de- da TV critic stated yesterday- if Susan Boyle did not win Britain's Got Talent, he was officially a big poo donut.
The Scottish singer proudly lost out to the twenty thousand person dance group 'Diversity'. The pundits...
Lovely little Hollie Steel, 10 (yes she is ten - Dave Solari on U-tube) has won the competition for the cutest crying child award of the BGT competition.
Hollie Steel 10, who is a cross between Lena Zavaroni and a Julie Andrews' clone, initially...
Amanda Holden, 47 has expressed her desire to appear nude to JUDGE the final of 'Britain's Got Talent'.
Les Dennis's former wife has tried on 300 frocks and has broken down in tears screaming "Nothing suits me".
An insider said " Amanda has b...
On the penultimate semi-final Amanda Holden, 43 age and 43 Botox injections was caught cutting up onions under her desk to evoke tears. An inside source said this is due to botox rendering her tear ducts redundant, but mainly because she is a heartl...
Susan Boyle the favourite to win Britain's Got Talent was said to have shocked members of the public by effin and blindin' after Piers Morgan said "Shaheen you are the best singer in the whole wide world and then some".
Onlookers who actually don'...
A children's watchdog charity has slammed 'Britain's Got Talent', due to the cruelty inflicted onto the younger contestants and Jamie Pugh - due to Amanda Holden.
Valerie Doolittle said " I am becoming more and more distressed with seeing childre...
Loopy- too- big- for- her- shoes Amanda Holden, 43 told a bum-rag newspaper she thought that pizza delivery driver Jamie Pugh had not been "genuine" during his performance of "Bring Him Home" from Les Miserables and said that she wished that she had...
Resident totty and not much else Amanda Holden 45, buzzed the Latvian siren belly dancer as she gyrated and bumped her way through a pointless routine on the first of the BGT semi-finals.
Amanda 45, who had made an effort to look nice was overcom...