The dearth of news emanating from Martin and Anne Shuttlecock's locally based address recently has led to a great deal of speculation.
Some observers assumed that the happily inept couple have gone into retirement, or at the very least, semi-retir...
Renowned spiritualist and pay per session medium, Carlos Decorum, revealed today that he was left in a distraught and extremely anxious state, following a seance at Carlisle's world renowned 'Cathedral Of The Dead Folk,' following an incident in whic...
Liverpool boss Brendan Rodgers was quick to jump to the defence of the Uruguayan striker at a press conference this lunchtime, ahead of the Merseyside derby, as a reporter accused Suarez of initiating the bloody Syrian uprising.
"That's a prepost...
South coast kebab, burger and pizza entrepreneur Ali Bullo today announced that the menu item known as the 'Big Jimmy' is to be discontinued with immediate effect from all of his conveniently located kebab and burger vans.
Market analysts speculat...
A local man has threatened to respond to what he described as "the ultimate insult" by performing in a You Tube skit - impersonating his own brother. And making him look a right 'twat'.
Martin Shuttlecock, a dashingly handsome and pioneering satir...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, announced today that Felix Baumgartner wasn't the only man on the planet pushing himself to the limits of human endurance, as Shuttlecock himself became involved in pushing personal boundaries to the limit.
As Felix...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, today made the controversial assertion that Childline mouthpiece, Esther Rantzen, knows more than she's letting on about the Jimmy Savile paedophile allegations, before going on to say that she appears to be in denial a...
Scarborough Borough Council today issued a statement to the effect that the late Jimmy Savile's grave has recently "substantially subsided."
The furore raised by recent allegations against the former BBC disc jockey and TV presenter has been parti...
The horrendous accident occurred at somewhere around nine am this morning in a warehouse on an industrial estate in Burnley, Lancashire, owned by Spoffco, a novelty greetings card company.
Alert employees immediately called the emergency services...
As if things aren't already bad enough in this septic isle, the devastating revelation that beleagured Britain faces an impending bacon shortage has left plucky Brits reeling.
Bacon, a staple ingredient in the 'Full English' and a much heralded bu...
The controversial and widely refuted claim was made by US historian, Paul Garfunkel yesterday. A history don at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, Garfunkel claims that the 'traditional' full English breakfast as we know it today, was actuall...
Grave concerns are being expressed by family and friends of Megan Stammers that a tearful reunion with her parents, Tracy and Martin, her stepfather, seems highly unlikely.
Those closest to 15 year old schoolgirl Megan - who eloped with her marrie...
Those plucky Brits have been warned this week to batten down the hatches and prepare themselves for prolonged outbreaks of mild weather.
Forecasters predict that the skies will probably be grey, and that gentle breezes will probably blow sporadic...
Notorious shed refugee, Martin Shuttlecock, who traditionally cuts and runs when the going gets tough, has apparently fled to the sanctuary of his garden shed again - for only the 345th time this year, after being mauled by way of a change by well in...
Following a much hyped probable negative reaction by Manchester United supporters against their Liverpool counterparts, over a tribute to the fallen 96 of Hillsborough, the media were left with nothing to report, as the Manchester United fan continge...
In an aside from legal wrangles in La Belle France, relating to a certain 'invasive photographic' orgy of unnecessary and quite pointless overexposure, which of course was lapped up by the French, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have been getting a...
At a press conference at Salford Lads Club today, a group of Manchester United supporters refused to promise to be on their best behaviour at Anfield, as Sunday's clash between the bitter rivals looms ever closer.
The rebuff comes amid press conce...
Following the furore surrounding the release by treacherous French ingrates, who for some reason fail to appreciate the sacrifices of D-Day and the Normandy landings, of intrusive intimate photographs taken by scumbag paparazzi of the Duchess Of Camb...