It has been announced (mostly by me) that in the next series of Strictly Come Dancing, to begin next year, a same-sex couple will feature. Bruce Forsyth, asked about the rumour, said "I'm staying tight lipped. And with all the queens round here that...
The Spoof has braced itself from a battering from Hurricane Earl. The hurricane, said to rate 5 stars on the spoofometer, is approaching fast from Eastern Europe and is rumoured to already have ruined Vladimir Putin's short break in Sochi.
Spoof l...
Doris Miliband, mother of David and Ed, has announced that she is to run for the Labour leadership. She told Mrs Grayson at number 76, and within a matter of minutes the whole town knew.
Doris Miliband is concerned that Labour members should have...
Two Lesbians have been forced out of an Anglican Church because their continued sexual activity was hitting the collection takings. St Muff's in Much Licking, Dorset, has banned the two Lesbians after a series of incidents.
The pair were caught be...
After the smiles came the cuts. And none bigger than the cut to the Olympic budget. The new Coalition Government has wasted no time in making cuts to public expenditure.
The Olympics were won at a considerable cost to the nation. Now George Osbour...
French President Nicolas Sarkozy is said to have repeatedly threatened to pull out unless a woman screamed like a whore. French civil servants have admitted that he also wanted her to dress like a Greek goddess and pretend to be sinking.
Jean-Luc...
Woking Crown Court heard today that Edward Terry admitted being the father of a footballer. Terry, 56, admitted supplying the world with a center half and is expected to be found guilty. He faces a maximum sentence of seven years as a season ticket h...
Jack Straw has been sensationally ruled out of the Labour leadership race on the grounds that he is a useless politician and nobody in their right mind will vote for him.
Straw consulted his wife over breakfast and was informed that she would neve...
A slug was said to be in a critical condition following eating an Australian after being challenged to a dare by a garden snail.
The slug contracted the little known disease Twat Lugworm following eating a twenty one year old from Sydney. New Sout...
The United States of America has been given the green light to be the eighteenth nation to join the Euro. As soon as Estonia has surrendered its sovereignty and become a toady to European capital, it will be the turn of the USA.
President Obama ha...
David 'Dave' Cameron has announced that Nick Clegg is going to fag for him at 10 Downing Street. Prime Minister Cameron is looking forward to having Clegg warm his crumpets over the fire.
Cameron, an Old Etonian and a member of the legendary Bulli...
Former children's TV presenter Johnny Ball has admitted being "so high" when he presented BBC1's Think Again that he "could hardly talk".
Speaking on a special documentary, 'A Load of Balls' the star said "Sometimes I was just so high. The adrenal...
Satan has become the new Prime Minister of Heaven, after forming a coalition with Nick Clegg's Liberal Democrats. God has resigned as Prime Minister and an election for leader of the forces of good will follow in July.
Satan was delighted to becom...
Michael Jackson is sensationally still alive. We can reveal that he is pretending to be his old friend 'Dave' Cameron. Observers have noted Cameron's rather high pitched vocal delivery and the fact that he is being followed around by a monkey called...
The National Socialists are expected to form a Government in the Reichstag over the next few days. Adolf Cameron has succeeded in his negotiations with the more moderate Nick Von Luddendorf, who has been offered an honorary position in the Government...
Pope Benedict XVI has announced plans for a final solution in his bid to purify the Church. In a radical move, the Pope plans to gas all members of the clergy who are found guilty of being paedophiles.
"Zis ist der final solution, ja? But it worke...
South African rubber producers are said to be "shit scared" of the impending arrival of the England World Cup Squad. Spokesman Thabo M'Johnnie said "We just don't know if we will be able to keep up with the demand. John Terry and Ashley Cole on the l...
The British Public have decided to form their own Government, following the protracted discussions of the 'professional' politicians.
Mrs Eileen Morris of number 17 Salcombe Avenue decided to pop round to see the Queen earlier today. "I said 'Yoo...