Hillary Clinton decided that if she isn't going to win the Presidency (Dictatorship) of the USA she will cut off "little Hill" and send it around the world on tour.
Finally a solution to stop the "TERRIS" crisis plaguing the United States. According to the guy that lives behind the rubbish bins, out back down the pub, Headsonpikes Inc. is running a contest offering a free trip to an underground, nucle...
To help the worldwide food crisis brought on by President Bush, hundreds of barrels of manatee vomit made into loaves were shipped in to the hideously disgusting African port of Ngumbobzuti Zhambouti on cargo ships this week.
"You can't even make a risotto?" Gordon Ramsey shouts at the UN Food Crisis Management Meeting today. "Shut it down, shut the kitchen down."...
Scientists and loafers, slackers, and losers at the Invisible Box University have determined that the most dangerous job in the world is a mime. A mime is more than 25 times more likely to die on the job than a crab fisherman or a test pilot.
It...
Expert economics professor Elmereesha Eelsniffer at Stanford University in California just finished a study. So says a flying chimp that nearly broke the windshield of my car on the way into OZ today. The study was an economical feasibility study to...
The entire Bush Mob and staff left town today and began gathering up all the children in the United States.
Snug Harbor, FL - Thousands of senior citizens, elderly folks, old farts, and just plain "Age-Challenged" are coming back to their nursing homes, assisted living facilities, and their houses wasted off their asses and then dying - according...
Democratic Republic of The Congo - Children affected by war in eastern Democratic Republic of Congo face starvation, says the UN food agency.
A plane carrying Hillary Clinton just ditched in the Atlantic Ocean this evening on the way back to New York from Indianapolis Indiana according to an invisible man in my garage who sits on a flaming rope.
A giant talking penis is making comments wherever it goes and getting on the news right and left and some people are calling for it to finally be circumcised once and for all.
Health experts in New York and Florida have discovered what makes people who move to Florida just as obnoxious as they were up in New York. One would think they would move down here and retire and have nothing to do but enjoy retirement and the nice...
Keeping the church (you praying) and the state (state highways) separate is the reason for the season.
In order to make the country safer, U.S. Vice President Dick Chain and a few of his comrades from the orifices of Der Homeland Security are now handing out death sentences for all people at airports wearing hats.
Lobbyists from the U.S. National Edumacation System finally got the Federal Government to pass another unconstitutional pea-brained law. This one is supposed to help stupid teachers keep from being embarrassed when trying to prounounce some of the ri...
Iliterrate teachers at the Untied States Teacher's Convection yesterday determined somehow that kids are stupider than they are.
Presidential Candidate John Q. McCain said he never said anything about getting rid of Texas. He restated he was trying to say we will have no more taxes. He blames the media for getting his words wrong and insists that he didn't "misspeak&q...
Vienna AUSTRIA, (TS) Josef Pretzl, the Austrian man who fathered seven children with his daughter while keeping her locked up in a subterranean dungeon as a sex slave for 24 years, will plead insanity to avoid a prison sentence.