Her Majesty the Queen's speech to parliament today has achieved the impossible - all members of the House who were in attendance remained awake.
Her Royal Majesty opened her speech with a plea to Wrigley's, the chewing gum manufacturer, not to lay...
The world had responded excitingly to the news that David Miliband has quit the heady world of politics to join International Rescue.
At a press conference this morning held on Tracy Island, former astronaut, Jeff Tracy, head of the Tracy family,...
The outgoing Chief Rabbi of the UK, Lord Dr Jonathan Sachs, has made a magnanimous offer to the College of Cardinals in the Vatican by offering to become the new Pope.
His office said that he made the offer for a number of reasons, some practical...
In a shock announcement by the Vatican today, it has been confirmed that Simon Cowell, the mastermind behind popular talent shows such as "Britain's Got Morons" and "£X-Factor" is being drafted in to bring some life to the process for choosing a new...
Despite facing possible closure as a result of government stupidity, Sheffield's Don Valley Stadium has shown its mettle by coming out fighting in order to save Nick Clegg.
A spokesman for the stadium, Donald Valley (no relation) said that while t...
Although fans of Pink Floyd may be very "uncomfortably numb" with the news, One Direction and Little Mix, X-factor winners who have been noted for their extraordinary lack of any real talent, will be getting together to not play any instruments and n...
The President of the Palestinian Authority, Mahmoud Abbas, is now up in arms over spam texts, although, it must be added that on this occasion, it's not firearms.
Palestinians throughout Gaza are being inundated with unwanted spam text messages ur...
The new Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby, was today confirmed in the position only because others being considered as candidates were eliminated from the running due to various factors.
Saintly Simon Cowell was eliminated from the running at...
Popular singing sensation and "Britain's Got Premium Rate Phone Lines" runner-up Susan Boyle (known as SuBo to her friends or "Mad Scottish Woman" to her detractors), has thrown her weight - thought to be approaching 14 stone - into the foray regardi...
The final shortlist for the soon to be vacant Archbishop of Canterbury position was announced today by a group of men in fancy dress and funny hats, although these were later revealed to be their religious uniforms worn for special occasions and to s...
Abu "Hook" Hanza, the radical terrorist, has challenged the Government for keeping him in Belmarsh prison for the past number of years, and has said that he should be released immediately prior to any sort of extradition.
He claims that he was pla...
There was uproar, mayhem and general chaos in government circles today when the chief whip accused some officials surrounding the leader's home of being "plebs".
Gaius Julius Caesar, leader of the Roman Empire and creator of the Julian calendar an...
There was shock, horror, more shock and even more horror in the UK as a film charting the adventures of a man who married a 7 year-old girl was premiered in Tehran today.
Titled "Prophet or Lolitas", the film consists of an incredibly flimsy scrip...
In a break from tradition, and in order to not have to rely on the paparazzi taking unofficial photographs, Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge, has gone public herself with previously unpublished photographs of her tits and pussy.
Prince William, the...
Prime Minister David Cameron has today announced the new members of his cabinet. Out go the old, and in come the, er, old, into jobs they know nothing about, mainly to afford them a substantial increase in salary and pension contributions between now...
Prime Minister David Cameron has today confirmed his cabinet reshuffle.
At a press conference early this morning, attend mainly by members of the press, Mr Cameron confirmed that his old cabinet had been effectively "thrown out the window of numbe...
There was shock and horror on the faces of both the Sir Richard Branson/Stagecoach consortium and the First Group when it was decided by the government that they were now not awarding the east coast mainline rail franchise to either of them.
It wa...
It was announced this morning that London football club Tottenham Hotspur is to offer degree courses, the first time a sporting club has entered the foray into third level education.
Famous not only for it's iconic stadium at White Hart Lane, it i...