The Los Angeles Police Department confirmed today the identity to be that of Different Strokes star Gary Coleman, 42, and is considering his death an intercranial hemorrhage.
For days local residence thought Gary Coleman was actually the fecal rem...
Local sales representative John Brewster was witnessed, by his daughter, giving an extra 10% on top of the already 100% that he had just given.
Brewster was washing his car this morning like usual when he had given it his all.
"I just had nothi...
The National Basketball Association Commissioner, David Stern, announced today the 2008-2009 season will be cut short and the Larry O'Brien trophy will be given to the Los Angeles Lakers.
To make up the loss to fans and players alike the rest of t...
Local man caves to mounting testimony from friends and admits he has used his cell phone while shitting but maintains it was only for texting and never while talking.
Jeff Blake found himself cornered in the last seat of the bar with some of his...
Joe the plumber has voiced his disappointment at what has turned out to be his "15 minutes of fame" to a local radio station in his hometown.
"Yeah, I was hoping for something more exciting," said Joe from his home.
Joe's "15 minutes" came as h...
Presidential candidate John McCain has endorsed Barack Obama in what many are calling an ill-fated strategy in his quest for the White House.
"I think the American people will respond to my sincerity," said McCain, "and will approve of my willing...
In a surprise resurfacing of an organization many considered dead, the Ku Klux Klan held a press conference at which Klan members preceded to kick the shit out of four nonminority members of the press to everyone's surprise.
"To revitalize a once...
High anticipation turns to bitterness as much-hyped Hurricane Gustav crawls ashore New Orleans an anemic category 3, leading many to write off this year's hurricane season.
"All of us in the sporting world had high anticipation for Gustav," said R...
In a reaction to public outcry Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig announced today at a news conference that the league office is looking into a ban on player's latest congratulatory trend of scrotum sack cupping.
"We are looking into the...
The makers of the BlackBerry smart phones have just released the latest addition of their market dominating device.
"We call this latest version BlackerBerry," said a spokesman for the company. "Because as we all know the blacker the berry the swe...
A secret recording was leaked of Pope Benedict's private meeting with clergy who were involved in the sex abuse scandal that threatened and tarnished the whole of Catholicism.
During his historic visit to New York City over the weekend, Pope Benedict XVI added to the Vatican's official list of sinners to a huge crowd at Madison Square Garden.
The United States Government has announced that its military will be handing out hand-held lie detectors to "accurately access" situations when dealing with members of the Taliban and Al Qieda.
The New York Knicks announced today that they will not be completing the season.
The MLB announced today major changes to America's favorite past time.
At a recent charity event our President and Commander-In-Chief was seized by hours of stunned silence after Bonzo the clown made a coin disappear then, seemingly, reappear behind Bush's ear.
New York Mayor Micheal Bloomberg today said "fuck it" and announced that he had an extramarital affair.
The Los Angeles Lakers announced today that the team will be changing their names after the final game of the 2007-2008 season.
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