SOUTH POLE, Antartica - With the news of a major oil repositories discovered in Victoria Land, Antartica, the U.S. military has been put in motion.
Hollywood, CA, U.S.A. - The dream boy of thousands of women has finally lost his virginity to none other than Paris Hilton. William Hung, a huge Ricky Martin fan and admired contestant for American Idol spent "the night in Paris" la...
Washington, D.C. - United States President George W. Bush threw a party today in honour of the U.S. led war in Iraq.
Beverly Hills, CA - Singer and actress (?!) Courtney Love, who recently completed an on-line law degree, decided to represent herself in court this week and promptly fired herself.
Los Angeles, CA - Scientists at U.C.L.A. have just announced a revolutionary approach to treating baldness - called Elective Decapitation.
Arlington, VA - With the failture of any of the Robots designed for the DARPA Challenge to actual complete the course, the military think tank has decided to try another competition for the "Specially Challenged Robot".
New York , N.Y. - Britney Spears' launch of her own cosmetics line through Elizabeth Arden will be limited to make-up for clowns.
SOUL, South Korea - Former heavyweight champion boxer Mike Tyson is running for the Presidency of South Korea. He's meaner than anyone in their National Assembly and he's ready to fight.
NEWARK, N.J. - Vancouver Canucks hockey player (and "goon") Todd Bertuzzi, having been suspended from the National Hockey League has been given a new op-po-toonity. He's going t...
Los Angeles, CA. - John Kerry has announced his running mate for the 2004 election - Pee Wee Herman.
Washington, D.C. - John Ashcroft, the religious and "crooning" U.S. Attorney General has surprised friends and family today with the announcement that he will auction his gall stone on ePay.
BAGHDAD, Iraq - With just hours to go before the official signing of the new Iraqi constitution, and a few missiles flying overhead to keep everyone "on their toes", some American school teachers have requested the experimental use o...
Beacon Minimum Security Correctional Facility, New York - Excitement is growing in one of New York State's only all female correctional facilities, as inmates request Martha Stewart as their own special cellmates.
Cape Canaveral, FL., U.S.A. - Scientists from N.A.S.A. made an unexpected discovery today when a unmanned space probe retrieved evidence that the planet Saturn may actually be an alcoholic's paradise.
Los Angelos, CA - Jimmy Walker, once known the World over as "J.J." on the 70s hit TV series Good Times has confessed that he has been acting as a secret body double for former Haitian ruler Jean-Bertand Aristide.
Modesto, CA. - Defense attorneys have asked that jury selection be halted amidst difficulties finding anyone sympathetic to Scott Peterson.
McDonalds Corp., Global HQ - Eager to cash in on the low-carb, macrobiotic and other dietary crazes sweeping the fast food marketplace, restaurant giant McDonalds corporation has announced that it will phase out Super sized products and introduce Mi...
HARVARD UNIVERSITY, Cambridge, Mass. - A select group of professors of linguistics from one of the world's most prestigious Universities have gone on strike, leaving several thousand students speechless.