Scientist's today came up with the startling revelation that the moon is definitely made of cheese.
This week beings the biggest sporting event since the "pass the parcel world championships" in August. Sources say that a record number of alcohol and drugs will be consumed throughout this prestigious event including Jim Bowen's favour...
It was discovered today that the much disputed actual height of former comic and chimney sweep Ronnie Corbett is seven feet.
Today it was announced by the government that it is to cut all normal electricity supplies and instead have old men lined up on a hill in the Yorkshire dales girating simultaneously with conductors attached to their groins.
It was controversially announced today that fat former pop star and prize pig herder Rick Waller will become the new James Bond.
Today outside a shop somewhere near the sleepy town of Kunt in Germany, Northern Ireland people witnessed shocking scenes of brutal savagery as about twenty boozed up midgets waited for a nun to come out of "gangreen gary's" tattoo parl...
Last night Harold hernia 65 apparently broke his neck whilst munching on his favourite evening snack "Herbert's Bulgarian Beans" all was going swimmingly until Harold took his last bite of the rich in iron snack.
Today in rather strange circumstances ex PM Tony Blair was found squatting in an abandoned flat...
The whole of Britain woke up today in shock as the news that 90 year old hag, Mrs Mavis Crapfield, opened a tin of condensed cream of mushroom soup to find what was later discovered as Marlon Brando's hip bone.
Today it was announced that Simon Cowell's production company will make a new show entitled "Idol Bastard Idol", where wannabe contestants fight it out to be crowned worlds most idol bastard.
Today at half past Bernard, in the sleepy welsh town of Rackett begins the month long tradition of the great onion kicking festival.
Today, it was announced that deputy PM and happy shopper lard spokesman John Prescott was named "World's Fattest Northerner", beating Cyril Smith, Chubby Brown and a capsized blue whale found near Barnsley.
Last week, our reporter Dolph Harris went to the sleepy town of Catshite in Liverpool to find out whether or not the strange sightings of an apparent 2 ton black and white spotted chicken grazing in some fat blokes shed was real.