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Funny story: Cheat Lewis Hamilton in drug shame

Cheat Lewis Hamilton in drug shame

Lewis Hamilton, lying cheat, has been caught up in another cheating storm. It is believed that the FIA are looking into allegations that he injected the illegal substance Nandrolone... into his McLaren. The drug Nandrolone, used widely by stars li...
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Funny story: England to change "three lions" badge

England to change "three lions" badge

In a farcical attempt to steal more money from fans, the FA have decided to change the iconic three lions badge. Instead of the three lions, there will be a tiger, a cheetah and a leopard. All whom are vicious enemies of the lions. Disgusting. A c...
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Funny story: Alan Shearer resigns/sacked...

Alan Shearer resigns/sacked...

Alan Shearer, balding, has been sacked... or did he resign. The decision came a couple of minutes after Shearer's press conference, where the board are believed to be unimpressed by his constant fidgeting and annoying body shifting in his chair. T...
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Funny story: Benitez claims he is not balding

Benitez claims he is not balding

The useless manager of Liverpool FC, Rafael Benitez, has once again proved his idiocy by, this time, claiming he is not on the verge of baldness. The thinning manager (and by thinning I categorically do NOT mean his torso) is known for his tenden...
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Funny story: Rooney wants to play for Brazil

Rooney wants to play for Brazil

Unfortunately what Wayne Rooney does not understand, is the basic grasp of common sense. He was born in England, everyone he is related to was born and raised in England, he was already played some 40 games for England, thus making him ineligible for...
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Funny story: Kuyt is better than Messi

Kuyt is better than Messi

This is the incredible view of "Fat Spanish Waiter" Rafael "ranting" Benitez. "Fat" Rafa claims that Dirk Kuyt, the poor Dutch "winger?", has better skill on the ball, is faster and generally better looking than "that midget Messi". "That midget" is...
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Funny story: McCain claims he "assed" Britney Spears

McCain claims he "assed" Britney Spears

John McCain, the Presidential candidate, has claimed to have "assed" Britney Spears. It seems by McCain to be an attempt to seem "less old" and less "abnormal" The revelation comes in the same week Liverpool Manager Rafa Benitez also claimed to "ass...
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Funny story: Benitez claims he is tanned

Benitez claims he is tanned

In what seems to be another bizarre attempt in seeming "normal", Rafael Benitez, the fat manager of Liverpool FC, has claimed that he has a tan. The incredibly white and bald manager, in what is seen by critics to be an attempt to seem "normal",...
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Funny story: Benitez: I watch porn

Benitez: I watch porn

In what seems to be another bizarre attempt by Rafa Benitez, the fat Liverpool Manager, to seem "normal", weird fuck Rafa has claimed to watch porn on a regular basis. Rafa, fat, claims that a regular night for him would be cosy-ing up next to the...
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Funny story: Formula One to have 100m sprint

Formula One to have 100m sprint

Formula One looks set to try and replicate the most popular track and field event, the 100m. Formula One bosses are quietly confident that the World Record 9.69secs by Usain Bolt can be broken by one of the Formula one cars, in what would be seen...
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Funny story: Liverpool and Chelsea to groundshare

Liverpool and Chelsea to groundshare

In an attempt to solve the ridiculous stadium problems at Liverpool and Chelsea, both clubs have agreed to share a ground between themselves. It was initially thought that Liverpool and Everton would share a ground, but that seems to have been a...
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Funny story: Federer: "Nadal is shit and he smells"

Federer: "Nadal is shit and he smells"

In his own words, Roger Federer, today revealed his true feelings and his bitter resentment towards Rafael Nadal, his biggest rival. On speaking about Rafeal Nadal, the world number one, Roger said the following regarding his feelings on being nu...
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Funny story: Britney: I want to lick Judi Dench

Britney: I want to lick Judi Dench

Ever since her infamous kiss with Madonna, Britney Spears is said to have longed for another passionate moment with an aged woman. According to her mother, who also recently wrote about her daughter's troubled early years, Britney has developed a...
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Funny story: Benitez to learn English

Benitez to learn English

In what seems to be a bizarre attempt by him to appear more appealing to the English Public, Rafael Benitez has finally decided to learn the English language. The change in heart came after the Everton game whereby Benitez claimed to not understa...
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Funny story: Dead man confirmed dead

Dead man confirmed dead

In a shock twist, a man who was pronounced dead has been confirmed to be dead. The dead man's family had hoped the man would come back to life, perhaps witnessing him on TV after 8 years, or suddenly find him to have lost his memory and appear at a p...
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Funny story: Dustin Hoffman to star as Michael Jordan in biographical film

Dustin Hoffman to star as Michael Jordan in biographical film

It has been announced that veteran actor Dustin Hoffman, 62, will play Michael Jordan, in the legendary basketball player's biographical film. White Dustin Hoffman, who stands at 5ft 5in, was seen as a ridiculous appointment purely due to his hai...
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Funny story: Havoc as BBC Website freezes for 7 seconds

Havoc as BBC Website freezes for 7 seconds

Life seemed so normal at 12.36pm and 20 seconds, but at 12.37pm and 21 seconds the world was turned upside down when the BBC Website froze. Chaos and rioting ensued in the streets of Britain, the biggest since a traffic light froze for 22 seconds at...
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Breaking News...

Simpsons Show to Kill Off Bart Simpson

"You could say the whole Bart concept was getting old, but actually we just couldn't take Nancy Cartwright's Scamatology ravings any longer" spoke the show's producers.
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